For context, it’s my birthday on Saturday. My 2 friends and I planned a girls weekend at the lake with a cool air bnb. Today I received this text. I’m already so tired and have enough going on idek what to do lol.

Im not sure if im overreacting because I GET it, the restaurant is hard to get into. But I feel like because this is something we planned weeks ago, that this would come first…

I don’t even care to blur out my friends names lol they suck im so upset

posting on throwaway I’m 25 (f) and she is 26 (f) as the texts say, we met in our first year of college and we have been friends ever since

she met her boyfriend in march of this year so they have been dating for a few months. I’ve met him about 4 times at this stage

this all happened at a party that was being thrown for a different friend of ours yesterday because he got back from travelling around Asia

the conversation is exactly what i said it was in the texts. He asked me about my degree because his sister is starting the same one soon. The entire conversation was just about this and we didn’t talk about anything else

this has never happened with any of her boyfriends so i’m worried that maybe i was being a bit inappropriate but it honestly didn’t feel like i was. AIO?

Some background- My ex-wife (33F) and I (33M) got divorced when we were 24.. 9 years ago. Since then, she has remarried and been with her new husband for almost 6 years. One of my daughters (11F) recently got into learning how to play the guitar and because I have multiple, I gave her one of mine so she can practice when she is at her mom’s house. The guitar has a lot of sentimental value to me. Ive played it at some of my friends weddings, at a good friends funeral, and a lot of other memories as well- including playing it for my daughter when she was an infant to get her to fall asleep. That being said, I found it kind of fitting for her to take over that guitar and start playing it herself now that she’s taken an interest in it- then today this happened. After our text convo, I called my ex wife and learned she sold it for $350 and bought a guitar for about $150. She’s always been the money hungry type and I can’t help but feel like she took advantage of an opportunity to make a quick $200. She started crying on the phone, calling me an insensitive asshole, and said she didn’t like seeing it in the house because it made her too emotional. The thing is too, my daughter was honored to get that guitar and I know she wasn’t complaining or calling it a “hand me down”. I’m not trying to be insensitive to how she’s feeling, but I also feel like she’s using that as an excuse. Even if she was feeling any sort of way about it, why not talk to me about it first or give me an opportunity to get the guitar back and get my daughter a different one before taking matters into her own hands? AIO or was she out of line?

These messages are between me(f15) and my child’s father mom.

I always had somewhat of good relationship with his mom she was known as my best friend’s mom before my BFs mom and she was honestly the one that pushed us to date oddly enough lol and she was there for me when my mom started to relapse and stepped in and help me prepare for the baby so these messages kinda hurt because I feel like she doesn’t care what her son did and I honestly saw her as a second mom so I value her opinion a lot .. but she just wants me back with him.. in these messages I didn’t even touch on the stuff about I already forgave him for …so to see her minimizing what he did I’m just made me sad and more alone…but I’ve been extra sensitive since having so I’m not sure if I’m overreacting or is she genuinely wants to help AIO?

Okay guys here we go. So I (with passion) HATE everything about the Joe Rogan podcast. My husband listens to it almost every day. We were on FaceTime and I told him the BIGGEST reason I dislike it is because of the way he views women. I mentioned (as an example) the time he had Joey Diaz on his podcast and Diaz said he made women give him blowjobs to get stage time in the comedy club, to which Rogan started belly laughing and clapping to. This is the conversation that transpired because I got off FaceTime visibly upset by his remarks, including that I was “wasting my time and energy talking about it” because it didn’t make a difference to him. Mind you, I have what I would consider a very open minded, progressive husband, so his stance on this is ACTUALLY pissing me off. AIO, is he, or are we both too deep in the trenches? Send help.

Okay i know this sounds silly but I 22 (F) met this guy 22 (M) and I really liked him. We ended up talking for a while and keeping it very PG but one night one thing let to another and I spent the night. We have previous history because we did talk in the past but it didn’t work out due to lack of emotional intelligence somewhat on both ends. So at the time we ending up sleeping together i was already on edge because I didn’t fully trust him to take care of me the way I needed and the way he said he would. Since this was the second time around of us talking I wanted to make him wait and to basically start over but as you see us sleeping together was not part of the plan and that also made me feel a bit uneasy. Either way the next morning we were laying in bed and I asked him if he was an eater because I want to know the person I’m sleeping with will take care of me at LEAST in bed. But this man said “I’m not putting my mouth where another 🥷s d**k had been” in the moment I didn’t react but when i reflected on this I was just thinking to myself how disrespectful that comment was? He made me feel like he thinks I’ve been sleeping around recently when I’ve even told him I’m really not out there like that. He’s also made small comments that upon reflecting feed into this narrative as well. I ended things with him and he has not contacted me so all of this to ask am I overreacting for ending things with him because of his remark and the situation?

So I had been dating my ex for about a year at this point. He was great in a lot of ways, but he has one super annoying habit — he makes little digs about my cooking. It’s not mean-spirited (according to him), but it adds up. Like if I make pasta, he’ll say,“This is good, but my mom’s sauce is thicker.” Or if I bake something, he’ll joke, “Not bad, but I’d give it a 7/10.” It sounds small, but after hearing it every week for months, it started to really bug me.

So last weekend, he invited some friends over for dinner. I cooked a full meal — homemade lasagna, garlic bread, salad, the works. Everyone complimented the food and said it was amazing. When he made his usual “critique” at the table (he said the sauce could’ve been less salty), I smiled and said, “Oh don’t worry guys, he’s just bitter because I actually found out his mom buys her ‘famous’ pasta sauce in a jar.”

The table went silent, then his friends started laughing. He turned red and barely spoke the rest of the night. Later, he told me I embarrassed him in front of his friends and crossed the line. I told him maybe now he knows how it feels.

So… Am I overreacting? Or was this fair game?

So basically I (25M) have been with my gf (23F) for about 8 months now and her birthday was coming up. I wanted to do something really special because things have been going great and I'm pretty serious about her.

I saved up for weeks and got her this gorgeous tennis bracelet - like the real deal, not some cheap knockoff. Cost me $1300 which is honestly a lot for me but I thought she was worth it. I was so excited to surprise her.

When I gave it to her at dinner, her reaction was... underwhelming? She said "oh wow, thank you" but didn't seem that excited. No big smile, no "omg I love it," just kinda polite? She put it on but then took it off before we even left the restaurant saying it felt "too fancy" for everyday wear.

The next day I asked if she liked it and she was like "it's beautiful but you didn't need to spend so much money on me." Then she mentioned how she would've preferred concert tickets to see her favorite band or even just a nice dinner together.

I was honestly hurt. Like, I put so much thought and money into this gift and she basically said she'd rather have something cheaper? It felt like she didn't appreciate the gesture or understand how much it meant to me to give her something special.

We got into this whole argument where she said I was being materialistic and I said she was being ungrateful. Things escalated and I ended up breaking up with her right there.

Now I'm wondering if I overreacted?

AIO here? Should I have handled this differently?

I, F(22) met this guy (M22) from hinge. We’ve been talking for a couple months. have not met yet as he’s been out of state. He recently came back to the state I live in and just a few hours before this message, we were dating about scheduling a date. Then he sends this??? Im honestly so confused and feeling like I need to distance myself. It seems he doesn’t see the issue and I’m not sure how to explain it to him. Or is it just me who thinks it’s weird he’s trying to pass me off to his friend, while continually saying he is interested in me???

I (23) broke up with my girlfriend because she (22) texted a guy secretly on my birthday and tried hiding it from me. We were sitting at our friends party next to each other and she showed me a text from her mom and I saw a name I’ve never recognized before and so I brought it up right away. She was stuck and paused and said a friend she met at her local park a couple years back and he messaged her cup pong to catch up. I looked through the chat and saw she had been texting him on and off for 2 years with a lot of deleted chat. To make it worse the chat history started all the way in 2023. I asked why she still had the messages and she said she deleted them but they came back when she got her new iPhone. All those details were really it for me and made me end the relationship. I’m just thinking, there’s NO WAY I’m overreacting/the asshole here right?

A few weeks ago I was sexually assaulted by a guy. When I told my parents they didn’t believe me. They brushed it off and acted like I was exaggerating.

Fast forward to recently, the same man raped my sister. Instead of supporting her, my parents blamed her. They kicked her out of their house, told her she was “embarrassing the family,” and she’s been living with me ever since.

They didn’t go with her to the police station or the hospital. I was the one who sat with her in the hospital for nine hours while she went through everything. My parents didn’t care, and after it was all over my mom had the nerve to ask her if the guy gave her any diseases.

It gets worse. My mom told my sister she should get a hysterectomy because of what happened, like this is somehow her fault. They’re so focused on appearances that they’re punishing her instead of protecting her.

Now because my sister is living with me, my parents are threatening me too. They’ve said they’ll call the police on me and even go after my business to make me regret helping her.

I am angry, disgusted, and honestly heartbroken. My sister has already been through hell, and instead of helping, our parents have turned their backs on both of us.

Yes, I called this guy out on social media (with my sister’s permission) because I refuse to stay quiet about what he did. My parents told me to delete it “or else,” as if protecting his reputation was more important than supporting their own daughters.

Also, I am 28, own home and my sister is 30 and was living with my parents.

Am I overreacting for wanting to cut them off completely?

This morning I got home after a long night shift and parked my car right in front of my house, like I normally do. A few minutes later my neighbor came outside and started yelling at me, saying that spot “belongs” to him because he’s always parked his truck there. He told me I was selfish and inconsiderate for taking it.

I tried to explain calmly that it’s public street parking and that I wasn’t blocking his driveway or taking extra space. He kept insisting that I should leave it open for him because it’s “understood” on our street. I was so drained that I just walked inside without arguing, but now it’s really bothering me.

I don’t want to have bad blood with him, but it feels unfair that I can’t park in front of my own home without being yelled at. Am I overreacting for feeling upset, or is he the one being unreasonable?

For some background information I have a summer house is the same city where my sister and her family lives. Me and my sister have a good relationship but I’m not that close with her kids. Anyway a few days before I left my summer house a cat gave birth in some bushes and abandoned her litter so me and my helper took them in. Yesterday I left the summer house but since the kittens were so young my helper decided to stay with them until they could walk. Today after I came back from work I opened my phone and saw a video took through the kitchen window my helper sent of my sister and her 3 year old daughter on my porch holding the newborn kittens. If they were just holding them I wouldn’t mind but my sisters daughter was aggressively holding a kitten up by its neck and my sister was laughing and recording. Along with the video was a frantic voice message my helper sent saying that they took one of the kittens. I was about to call my sister when I saw that she had sent videos on the family group chat of her daughter holding down the kitten with her leg while she put her shoes on and everyone in the group was replying with laughing emojis. I was very upset at that point so I just freaked out in the group chat. I admit that was irrational but I get so upset when animals are getting hurt. Everyone saw the messages I had sent and a few of my aunts replied that she’s just a kid and the cat doesn’t feel anything. Just as I was reading the messages my helper sent a picture of the kitten my sister took laying dead. She said that one of my sisters older kids dropped it off while it was still alive but a few minutes later it died. The animal abuse laws in my country are very strict so I didn’t call the police. Instead I texted my sister I don’t want to see her kids ever again and shut my personal phone off. AIO?

My ex boyfriend 20M has contacted me 18F numerous times since we broke up in 2022. This time he made a new phone number to message me because I blocked him on everything else. He dumped me originally and has tried to contact me nearly 5 times to try and get me back. I’ve reported him to the police awhile ago and even after I threatened to report this convo to the police, he continued to message me. It seems I warded him off by telling him I had sex with my current boyfriend whom I’ve been with for 8 months (wooowww so surprising) because I know he has jealousy issues. Is this considered harassment on his end? AIO?

I (f19) have a. cousin (m17). Every summer our whole family gathers in one house and it’s always very exciting. We go swimming, hiking, fishing, wattch movies, just enjoying the last weeks of summer. My cousin and I have always been close. We’re almost the same age, have the same hobbies, and honestly I’ve always thought of him as one of my closest friends.

This year we were hyped because on monday we planned a trip to an amusement park, just two of us. It’s pretty far away, last year we couldn’t go, so we’d been looking forward to it for months.

And than this crap happened.

At family dinner his mom (my aunt) made some dumb, harsh joke about him not having a girlfriend and spending all day in his room. He looked embarrassed, so I tried to cheer him up and said I don’t really chase relationships either, and that it’s not a big deal.

And he just snapped. He started ranting about how women have it so much easier when it comes to dating, attention, validation, etc. Everyone else went dead silent. I tried to respond, but he cut me off, looked me right in the face, and called me a foid.

That word made my blood boil. I know exactly what it means, I know what kinds of communities use it, and I find it absolutely disgusting.

So I told him flat out that I’m not going to the amusement park with him on Monday. If he can’t even show me basic respect and thinks it’s fine to insult me just for being a woman, then I’m not going to sit next to him on rides like nothing happened. He didn’t apologize. He said he “won’t take it back.”

Now I’m stuck wondering did I overreact? Was I too harsh with canceling our plans? Or was I right to draw a line after he said something like that Oof.

Edit on second day: I'll be trying to respond to the comments through the day, thank you all for your thoughts here. Response to financial questions in top comment.

So my wife (34F) and I (32M) have been struggling financially since the beginning of this year. Some decisions were made that have put us in a fair bit of debt, and it’s been hard to stay afloat and knock the debt down.

Since February and for the second time ever, I’ve been working two full time remote jobs as a software engineer to make enough to cover our expenses and save / clear debt. Total yearly combined was around $280k before taxes, but when paying down the debts and such we’d often end up nearly net 0 at the end of the month, which was frustrating. I’m not a big spender, but my wife has a bit of a shopping therapy habit.

I was told last Friday the 22nd that the 29th (tomorrow) would be my last for my second job, as the project was ending early and they’d be terminating my contract (unfortunately they have that right). So I’ve been scrambling to find a replacement on such short notice, knowing that my main job barely covers rent and daycare as it is.

Recently, my wife wanted to help out as a short term boost by returning some of her Nordstrom clothing. I was against this (as I always have when she’s suggested it) as I don’t like the idea of her doing that. She’d been replying that it was fine, she didn’t wear those items really ever anyway, and it would help. I believed her, so I acquiesced and dropped it.

Now, I am catching flak day after day for not making enough income to provide my family with the lifestyle they need. The text exchange above happened this evening as I was putting our boys to bed (I am the one to take care of them when they’re home, play with them, bath them, and put them to bed; she struggles with this and doesn’t like to do it).

I get a lot of shit frequently for years that I haven’t bought us a house yet. Even though we’ve lived in the San Jose (house? Yeah right) and Seattle (1.5mil only half as bad as SJ) since 2019.

My income is always seen as inadequate even when it’s been over 250k, mostly because I don’t work for a company like Google yet and don’t get stock money. It’s frustrating as hell when she knows the situation through and through.

She’s now pissed at me for using the word “deceived”, saying she doesn’t deserve to have me say that after all the sacrifices she’s made.

So I ask, was I wrong to feel deceived when she told me it was fine that she returned the clothes, but then came back and used it against me in this argument?

Throwaway because my husband knows my main account.

TL;DR: Husband and his family pushed me into having a wedding I didn’t want, I ended up planning and paying for most of it, and the day was filled with hurtful comments and speeches that excluded me. Two years later, I still feel upset and haunted by it, and I’m wondering if I’m overreacting.

My husband (early 30s M) and I (early 30s F) got married two years ago. For context: I really didn’t want a wedding. I made this clear, but my husband and his family insisted I didn’t have a choice - we had to have one. He’s American, I immigrated here a long time ago.

Even though it was the last thing I wanted, I went along with it since it was so important to them. What I wasn’t expecting was:

• That I’d end up planning most all of it.
• That I’d cover most of the cost (apparently because “the bride’s side pays” in American culture, which I hadn’t realized was something people still enforced)
  • We didn't have a rehearsal dinner or any of the other typical events.

The result: it felt less like my wedding and more like a big party for his family and friends. They had a great time. For me, it was honestly a nightmare that still upsets me years later.

Here are the main things that still stick with me:

1. Some of his relatives I met for the first time made comments like: “Wow, you speak English better than I thought” (I don’t even have an accent) and “Are you guys not getting married in a church because of your citizenship status?” (?? I grew up Christian, and I’m a U.S. citizen).
2. One of his grandparents gave a prayer that focused almost entirely on my ethnic background instead of our marriage or us as a couple.
3. I didn’t want speeches from my friends, but some of his friends gave them—and every single one only talked about how great he is, not about us as a couple. I told my husband later that it made me feel invisible and hurt, but he brushed it off as a “cultural difference” and said speeches in the U.S. aren’t usually about the couple. (That hasn’t been my experience, but I dropped it.)

I know for many people their wedding day is one of the happiest memories of their lives. For me, it’s the opposite; it makes me cry whenever I think about it.

My husband and I have argued about it many times, and I’m at the point where I feel like maybe I’m overreacting or need professional help to get past it.

So… am I being unreasonable for still being this upset two years later?

EDIT: Thanks so much to everyone who responded — your input has really helped validate my thoughts and given me a much-needed sanity check. I did want to clear up a few things that have come up in the discussion:

1. We do have a strong marriage, and he treats me with respect. For most of our relationship, it's been a challenge navigating boundaries with family but things have improved a lot over the last year.
2. When it comes to conflict, we’re usually able to work through things in a really healthy way. The challenge is that this particular issue is much harder for me to move past. He’s made efforts to make it up to me where he can, but I still struggle with it mentally. Things will feel fine for a while, but whenever I think back to our wedding, I find myself spiraling and feeling upset all over again.
3. Regarding the planning of the day, I do understand that in many cases the bride takes the lead since the groom often doesn’t care about the details. In our situation, though, it was hurtful that it felt like I was expected to both pay for and plan a big event I didn’t even want. In a way, it felt like being forced to dig my own grave.
4. To clarify, I had met his friends and most of his family before the wedding. There were just a few relatives I hadn’t met until that day, and unfortunately, some of them were the ones who made the comments I mentioned earlier. As for his friends, I’ve known them throughout our entire relationship and have formed my own friendships with them, so it wasn’t that they didn’t know me.

I truly appreciate everyone who’s taken the time to respond.

Throwaway account. Might be long, sorry.

I (M41) been with my gf (F36) for just over two years. In those two years we've learned a lot about each other and grew significantly together. We both have had our share of bad relationships, I myself had just gotten out of a toxic 16 year marriage.

The one thing we promised each other early in the relationship is to be as open and honest about everything as we can. Through several conversations we've discovered a lot of our problems in the past have stemmed from this and we don't want them to repeat. For the most part I feel we've done a pretty decent job at this. We've gotten each other to open up about things that were bothering us and we worked them out. In the end they turned out to be not as bad as we thought they'd be and through that we learned a little more, and loved and appreciated each other a lot more.

As I'm typing this I'm realizing the answer to my own question is to just address the issue and talk about it. But here's my hang up, and I've been stewing over this for a while now. This issue is porn. A lot of relationships have had major issues with porn. A big part of the issues with my last marriage was that I was being accused of being addicted to porn. I'm not. But that's not what we're here for...

We've had this discussion. We are both comfortable with each other occasionally watching it, we've even watched it together several times, awkwardly, and decided it's best to just keep it a private thing. We've talked about what we're into, what excites us and gets us going. We've dived into some of the weirder stuff and had a few good laughs at it. We go to the "adult" shops and buy toys, lubes, even those questionable enhancement pills just for fun.

The long and short (heh) of it is that we're pretty comfortable with each other, both sexually and of course normally. We consider each other our best friend. I've never had a relationship where I've been more open or comfortable with everything before, it's bizarre how I've gone so long and have never felt the way I do now.

I hope that give a good idea of our relationship, now onto the issue. The other day we were lying in bed, we had just woken up from a fun night before and we're recapping some of the details. One of the topics was funny halloween costumes. We start looking at some stuff on Amazon on her phone, and she then gets up to go use the bathroom. Now I know what you're thinking and no we don't snoop through each other's phones, we both know each other's passwords and let the other have full access to them whenever. We have nothing to hide. BUT! I remember having this costume conversation before so I go to pull up some webpages we've already checked out. I open up the history and start scrolling down pretty fast. Of course I see the porn pages but think nothing of them as I try to find what I'm trying to find.

Once I find it I see a few other hits nearby but this time actually see what it says: cuck

Yep the OTHER c-word. Now again I don't think to much of this until I start scrolling back up and start seeing it more and more only this time with other searches mixed in: interracial, BBC, cheating wife that kind of stuff. And it's A LOT. Like every day a lot.

Now back when we first got together and were discussing things like this and our history of relationships, I confided in her that I've been cheated on a few times and she knows that I have some serious issues with it. She also confided in me that she had cheated on her partner as well so I know she has a history of it. Also this scenario never came up when we spoke about our porn likes.

So now my thought process is my girlfriend, whom I had the best experience with, gets off on idea of me watching her cheat on me... This of course only open the floodgates to other thoughts of not being good enough, is this what she really wants, and worst of all, has this happened?

The thing that gets me is that this was so hidden. We've tried so hard to keep open lines of communication. We've made it a priority to be open and honest with each other and we know how each other feels about certain things. She's made comments that just seeing me interact with other women, even in total innocence, makes her jealous and her thinking of being with anyone else makes her feel sick. Now whether that's true or not, the meaning behind it only enhances my feeling over the whole issue.

So, AIO? Or do I just need to chill out and let freaks freak?

Edit: While I may not respond, I am reading and appreciate everyone's replies. Thanks for everyone's insight.

I was in the area the other night and decided to drop by my friend’s place unannounced just to say hi. We’ve been close for a long time, so it didn’t feel like a big deal. She had just finished making dinner and the whole place smelled amazing so I naturally said "that smells good!" She offered me a plate, and I figured why not. I wasn’t planning on eating there, but since she offered, I said yes. Honestly, if she hadn’t, I would’ve been totally fine just hanging out while she ate.

We sat down, had dinner, and the night felt super normal. We talked, caught up, nothing out of the ordinary. Then the next day I get a Venmo request from her for $12. At first I laughed because I thought it was a joke, but it turns out she was dead serious. She told me groceries are too expensive now, which I get, but it still felt really weird to basically get billed for a casual dinner at a friend’s house.

It caught me totally off guard and now I’m wondering if I’m making a big deal out of nothing or if it really is out of line to charge a friend like that.

I (22f) told my boyfriend (22m) he needs to go back to his parents house since he wants to be babied so badly. He feels I’m being mean. To give a lot of context he has lived in my home for exactly a year now, before that he had his own apartment he let go as we agreed to live together and split costs. About 2 months into living together he called me from work and said he wanted to quit. I responded with “please don’t until you have another job under you. I don’t want to and will not take care of you”. He swore up and down I wouldn’t be, quit his job, and now has been unemployed for 10 going on 11 months. Since then I have paid for all food and groceries, every single house bill, entertainment, 🌲 bill, nicotine..if it costs money I’m paying for it. He’s pitched in 50/50 for groceries maybe 3 times. Now in this year span I have gained custody of my 14 year old sibling, giving me more to take care of emotionally and financially. I’ve told him over and over to get a job. I’m starting to struggle with money, I need support etc Eventually I got to the point where I felt worn to the seams and have not been as nice as I used to be, I don’t want the same affection or intimacy, and I snap on him over “little things”. The little things being stuff like me coming home from work and things are dirty, it’s evident he’s done absolutely nothing all day and he’s sitting on his game. Every. Single. Day. Since I am working and paying for our everything we made an agreement that he would cook (dinner) and clean. It takes a max of 30 minutes a day to keep the house tip top shape as I keep my home clean to begin with. I wanted him to cook dinner and clean the kitchen afterwards essentially. Without fail he would cook and leave left overs, ingredients, and condiments on the counters to spoil. So often we got flies…Groceries I’m single handily working for and paying for. I mean I don’t understand how he doesn’t get why that’s so frustrating.. anyways very recently I had a car issue. I was using his car to get to and from work for a couple of weeks, well one night a repo man got me.. he had not been paying his car payment little to my knowledge. Leaving me with no work for over a week and a half. You might wonder how’s he going to pay for his car if he’s unemployed? Well a few years back he had an interaction with an officer that led to a HANDSOME settlement. I questioned why would he not be paying if he has the money and he said he just “forgot to switch info over for payment and didn’t get notifications because I don’t have a phone” and he will “just get a car off of marketplace no big deal” well that obviously pissed me to the moon but also had me thinking why has he NEVER pulled out a few bucks to help support himself or better yet help me support him? Especially if he can just go grab a car so easily right…So one night after getting home from a long shift I got dishes out of the room, cleaned up, got the hair out and unclogged my bathroom sink he shaved in,and took the dogs who haven’t been out in too long outside I told him “you need to go back to your f*ing parents house since you want to be babied sooo badly! I’m done being your mommy! And you won’t even take care of yourself it’s not fair my brother and I are losing out on things because I’m trying to be your mommy too!” He thought that was really mean and uncalled for… am I overreacting? I genuinely don’t believe so but I kinda feel bad. I know it’s like well you’re stupid for doing it but I’m the type that had to take care of their family their whole life and if I don’t I feel immense guilt. Oldest surviving daughter of a throwed off family If you will. Also the type to make things happen no matter what even if I gotta pay a few extra bucks.. but it’s biting me in the behind in my adult relationships.

My roommate and I agreed at the start of the semester that we’d each buy our own groceries and label what’s ours to avoid confusion. I usually do my grocery run on Sundays, and by mid-week, half of my stuff is gone…snacks, milk, even leftovers from dinner.

I’ve brought it up twice, and she keeps saying “Oh, I thought you didn’t mind” or “I’ll replace it,” but she never actually does. It’s not even about the money at this point. It just feels disrespectful because I meal prep and plan things out for the week.

I’m debating locking up my food, but I don’t want to be that roommate. Am I overreacting, or is this as annoying as it feels?

I 27(F) caught my husband 27(M) messaging girls with explicit content on Reddit multiple times over the last few months.

He apologised the first time and said he was just trying to see what Reddit is all about and said he wouldn’t do it again and I tried to understand.

A few weeks later, he did it again and hid the messages. I somehow found the conversations he had with 3 different girls. We had a huge fight, I said I’ll leave. He apologised and deleted his account and said he’d never do it again. I forgave him again.

After this, I kept asking him if he was doing something similar again, and tried to reassure him that even if there is something, we can work it out as long as he comes and talks to me about it and I don’t have to find it in his account again. 2 months later, when I asked again, he admitted that he talked to a few people but was just trying to make new friends. I believed him and we moved on.

Even though I believed him and was supportive, I couldn’t shake this bad feeling that I had. So I logged into his account through his email a few days later. There I found another message that he had sent to a girl calling her pretty along with some messages to some other people (according to him the innocent attempts at making friends). All of these account were again of girls with explicit accounts. He deleted the app after talking to them so I wouldn’t see them. These conversations spanned over a few days.

I confronted him but he says it’s not cheating. He is apologising again and told me that he had deleted the account for good this time.

AIO for thinking it is still cheating because he’s out there calling other girls pretty and hiding it from me?

I work 7on/7offs for work. Our youngest is starting school. I told him I’m going to be so bored, and he tried to throw in the fact he’s gonna put up cameras. I gave him a weird look, but didn’t say anything because if I disagree it’s “suspicious”. He already put up a porch camera, which I think is great but it’s already caused issues. We live in an apartment and there have been multiple occasions where he thinks it’s “sus” because some guy walked by. I don’t have access to the footage. But he will show me and be like “weird this Camery was parked in front of our apartment, and left 15 minutes before I got home”. We have an extra door cam that’s been laying around he wanted to put on our back door, and I have this sneaky feeling he’ll try to put it in the house. I might actually take the leap and leave him if he try’s. AIO to this comment.

Edit/update Tried to stand up for myself this morning. After waking to argue, he tried to “snuggle” me by lifting my leg and putting his (clothed) erection between my legs! I got mad and moved over, and told him sometime I like to not be touched sexually, he proceeded to say it wasn’t sexual and then said that he’ll just “not be attracted to me anymore then.” I think I’ll be contacting a dv hotline anonymously the next time I safely can….. I really want out. I know it’s small but I haven’t stood up for myself in a long while…. Felt nice.

I was visiting a friend I’ve known for over 20 years, when he did something almost surreal. His gf was there. My young daughter was there, too. We were settling in to chat and eat pizza, discussing maybe watching a child-friendly movie, when he casually asked me how my job was going and I mentioned that I had just gotten a raise. He said that’s great news, then dismissed himself without explanation and went into the other room. While we waited for his return, his gf started painting my daughter’s nails, which my daughter loves. A minute later my friend re-enters the living room holding a book. “Hey I’m really looking forward to your opinion on this novel I just bought. Just read the first page aloud I really want your take on it.” He hands me the book, I open it and … it’s in French.” He knows I can’t read French. He has known me for 20+ years. He knows Spanish is the only language I ever studied, in middle school decades ago. He also knows that it has always bothered me that I didn’t study French. This man, in front of my daughter, has asked me to read aloud a book that he knows I cannot read, in a language that he also knows I regret never learning. I looked up confused. “Dude. This is in French.” Then my friend in exaggerated dramatic style says, “You can’t read it? Oh I’m sorry I thought you were literate in French…. My bad. I didn’t mean to embarrass you.” As I began to grasp what a colossal ahole he was being, my instinct was to stand up, take my daughter’s hand and just walk out, but she was having too much fun getting her nails done. I didn’t want to disappoint her. Mind you, my friend never said “just pranking you bro.” No, he kept up the facade the entire evening pretending to be shocked I couldn’t read French. His gf gave him disapproving looks now and then as if to say to him, “Cut the sh*t,” but he ignored her. My daughter was too young to fully grasp the situation and way too focused on her nails. It occurs to me that my mention of getting a raise may have triggered him to do this, but that response isn’t really what friends are supposed to do. I haven’t spoken to him since that day. The friendship now just feels extremely weird.

First pic is from last month. Second pic is from today.

I sent my 3 year old semi-non verbal autistic son (Niko) to his father’s house (Ex) so he can spend a few days with him. I say semi-nonverbal because even though he’s talking more than he did last year, he’s still not fully communicating his wants and needs.

He had long hair, growing since he was born. It was his comfort. He played with it to stim and calm down. I’ve had his hair in a pony tail before and he didn’t like the fact he couldn’t feel his hair easily. I figured since it’s a comfort to him, we won’t cut his hair until he can tell us he wants it cut. (I did that with all my kids. Didn’t cut their hair except trims until they told me they wanted it cut.)

I normally take him to a local hairdresser that is amazing with him and he sits still with her and lets her cut his bangs. Today, Ex says that his step sister can cut his hair. I figured since I have verbally told him MULTIPLE TIMES and even a message to only trim the bangs, I shouldn’t have had to remind him again. I should have, considering ex’s mother has made multiple comments about how Niko looks like a girl and he needs his hair short so people will know he’s a boy. 🙄

I’m at work and I get those messages. I’m fucking livid. I know in the grand scheme of things it’s just hair, but it’s not about the hair. It’s the fact that he didn’t care if his son flipped out over a shaved head, he was doing what mommy wanted. He didn’t even consider that his son’s hair was a comfort for him. It’s about the fact that oh maybe I wanted to be there for his first official haircut. It’s the fact that my wishes weren’t respected and now my trust is completely broken with that family. I already had problems with them, mainly Ex not stepping up and being a father in any way (that’s a long story in itself) and his fucking mommy dearest always being there to clean up his messes and make excuses.

I know I’m the fucking idiot that procreated with this useless man, don’t need to remind me.