r/BPD • u/Equal-Cauliflower139 • 1d ago

Partner/Friend Post What do you wish your parents/carers did differently when you were a teenager?

I’m a step-parent of a newly diagnosed teen with emerging BPD. I’d love any advice that you can share about things your parents/caregivers did that helped when you were younger. Also, are there things you recommend we avoid? Thank you in advance!

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u/MidwestMeadows00 1d ago

Unfortunately, I think a lot of us had parents that possibly caused or added to the personality disorder. As a parent myself, I would say just BE THERE. Be present. Allow the child to express everything with no boundaries (if they say they feel this way or that way- don’t invalidate their feelings even if it seems to not make sense.) Remind them frequently how happy you are when they are around. Be patient as they learn to regulate these very deep and strong emotions. It’s so hard to control the talking back, snappiness and anger so be patient as they learn to express that in a more regulated way as well. I STILL snap on my loved ones. Good luck! You being here asking for advice is already a great sign!