r/CrazyFuckingVideos • u/Soloflow786 • 5d ago
Imagine having to travel 8ft just to see a part of your own body...
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u/Donkeybrother 5d ago
Beautiful creature but I wouldn't want one for a pet .
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u/Individual_Cow7365 5d ago
When I was a kid, my dad worked with a guy that had a huge python. I can't remember how big, but when I was out, it would move the furniture around. At the end, they could no longer contain it in his cage and he just had a whole room to itself. One day, it wrapped him up and he couldn't get out, his wife tried to help, but she couldn't get it off, luckily the neighbor was outside and got there real quick. They 3 got him off just in time. He donated it to the zoo the very next day.
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u/PineBones 5d ago
I’ve got a Burmese python with his own room. He’s sweet like a puppy and has never hurt any of us. He also doesn’t even strike at his food when we feed him we just gently place it near his mouth and he’ll slowly take the food away. Regardless of all this we still keep vinegar and rubbing alcohol nearby in a spray bottle in case of any bites a quick spray should get him to release. We have a Kukri knife for emergencies and we never handle him alone. He’s never given us anywhere near a reason to use anything on him but we can’t just act like he’s not capable of killing us.
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u/Individual_Cow7365 5d ago
I agree. This all happened back in the late 80s/early 90s. I don't remember all the details. But I do know ow that he had the snake for a very long time and he never had any reason to fear it until that day.
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u/rxuz 5d ago
Fuck everything about that, if we were friends I'm never coming to hang at your place
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u/PineBones 5d ago
This is my cats house anyway. They don’t like visitors
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u/PineBones 5d ago
I do the same thing lol it’s not like “playing” to them they’re kinda just existing and experiencing the world. It definitely gets them used to being touched so when he’s taken to schools or libraries with kids he just could not give a shit at all about being touched. It also helps that we’ve raised him since he could fit in the palm of our hand l
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u/Uncommonality 4d ago
Those are good precautions. Humans are mammals, snakes are reptiles - we're a different kind of being, our psychologies are largely incomprehensible to the other party. Coexistence is definitely possible, but on top of the reptile/mammal divide, snakes are not domesticated. You could probably unconditionally trust a snake if humans had selectively bred its species to like us for 30.000 years (like we did with dogs), but we haven't, so security should never be neglected
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u/Upstairs-Fly3528 5d ago
Don’t get me wrong but what’s the point of owing a pet when you’re always this cautious.
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u/PineBones 5d ago
I got him as a dumb teen but since then he’s taught us respect and responsibility. He’s changed the direction of my partners and my life. She brings our reptiles to school or library events to teach kids about them. Having our pet reptiles and rescuing/rehabing others has helped my partner realize she wants to be a vet so she left her career and started veterinary school. Only good things and knowledge has come from owning them we’ve never had issues other than this one female snake we have. She tries to bite you through the glass and will keep trying until her nose is bloody.
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u/Toystavi 5d ago
Would you ask someone the same thing if they had a horse or a donkey? They can also kill you if you do the wrong thing. You have to be cautious to not get kicked as that can be very dangerous. Riding safely requires both training and safety gear.
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u/Lawd_Fawkwad 5d ago
Those are not at all equivalent.
Horses and donkeys are domesticated animals that have been bred to trust humans innately, even most "wild horses" are just feral.
A horse can kill you just like a dog can ; it's extremely rare and goes against its biological programming so it won't happen unless there's extreme abuse or or some underlying health condition.
Pythons, hippos or alligator on the other hand are not domesticated and they do not have instincts that tell them to trust humans and not harm them. If you raise it from birth it may trust you, but you're operating in a dynamic where it sees you as a survival tool and as a peer rather than as a master.
Keeping an undomesticated animal as a pet is a huge and stupid risk, and if you look at the nutters who keep tigers and lions as pets you'll find dozens of cases of handles who said their fluffy murder machine was "a cuddly puppy" until it took their hand off.
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u/911MemeEmergency 5d ago
Yeah but they are still much smarter and more emotionally intelligent than reptiles you know. Plus they are useful of you lead any sort of farming life, especially in rough terrains where cars can't maneuver.
I mean the more I think of your analogy the wilder it seems to me, you are comparing what has been the actual "man's best friend" for millennia (sorry dogs), to fucking snakes.
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u/popey123 5d ago edited 5d ago
You know, and i'm not saying it in a rude way but you and your python are not special.
You are at best important enough for it's survival so it doesn't kill you yet30
u/PineBones 5d ago
Why do you think I keep a kukri knife in case I need to cut his head off? I’m well aware of this. I’m not going around saying they’re perfectly safe. They are definitely not and will eat your children or kill your if your arent safe.
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u/qtstance 5d ago
My sister's boyfriend had one that wrapped around the toilet and squeezed it till it exploded, the toilet that is.
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u/Y0___0Y 5d ago
Snakes have a weakness. Rubbing liquor in their eyes causes them to release if they try to eat you.
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u/ssyl6119 5d ago
Why did i think this was a woman wearing leggings that matched the snake 😅
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u/EverydayImBufffering 5d ago
For a moment, I was wondering why a woman slapping her own leg is a crazy fucking video.
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u/Cold_Efficiency_7302 5d ago
I was confused by how long and thick the legs were, then I realised there was a similar looking snake thing
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u/R12Labs 5d ago
People like this project traits and emotions onto animals that don't have them. Like the grizzly man. I wonder why.
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u/medic-in-a-dress 5d ago
Exactly. I really love snakes and think they make good pets but they do not love you. At best they tolerate you.
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u/ZeShapyra 5d ago
Yeah as someone who keeps snakes, these dang tubes do not exibit a lot..well any emotion, mainly fear if they get spooked, but they are cutie patooties
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u/SquirrelTomahawk 5d ago
dogs love everyone
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u/224th 5d ago
this^ yall remember that lady who got mauled by her chimpanzee?
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u/SeaworthinessIll2517 5d ago
no, that chimp had emotions and expressed them pretty clearly
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u/Acurseddragon 5d ago
The one that had her face ripped off and her friend who were visiting called emergency? Yups. Humans are weird.
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u/satansboyussy 5d ago
Worse, it was the friend (not the owner) who came by the house to help get the chimp back inside and got her face and hands ripped off. It was the chimps owner on the 911 call. Imagine you come over to a friends house, step out of your car, and immediately get your face ripped off by an angry chimp while the person who called you over there can only stand and watch.
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u/trotski94 5d ago
But different - at least with other mammals we have a chance of understanding their emotions, for the most part it’s been proven a lot of mammals can learn interpret human body language, but reptiles are so detached from our evolution that it’s like trying to communicate with an alien, there’s zero common ground.
We can probably understand a chimp to an extent, but only to the extent you can understand or trust a psychotic schizophrenic
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u/WeenisPeiner 5d ago
That chimp was given Xanax before to help calm it down. Which apparently has the opposite effect on chimps.
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u/bad-and-buttery 4d ago
I doubt that it’s the opposite effect. Xanax lowers inhibition and makes humans do crazy shit too.
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u/Greenman8907 5d ago
It’s your best friend until it isn’t.
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u/_0iii0_ 5d ago
Until you not feed them for some weeks
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u/Rulebookboy1234567 5d ago
my roommate has fed this same snake like hundreds of times over her life. she just bit him the other day 'cause he smelled like food.
its called "reptile brain" for a reason. there is very little going on up there.
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u/buzz8588 5d ago
You can hear a baby in the background, makes for a quick snack
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u/Fickle_Builder_2685 5d ago
Relax it's not a pitbull
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u/WhyIsItAlwaysADP 5d ago
Bruh, your snake doesn't have human emotions, no matter how much you want it to. You'd better keep him well fed, bud.
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u/Starfighterle 5d ago
Kinda cute. If I could be 100% sure it won’t strangle me at night I would love to have one
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u/Historical_Koala977 5d ago
FYI: You can’t
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u/PineBones 5d ago
My Burmese python has his own room. We lock it down like a prison though since I have cats too.
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u/Historical_Koala977 5d ago
Rightfully so. If I can be indefensible food to an animal it gets locked up
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u/PineBones 5d ago
Yeah they’re a giant muscle noodle with a mouth. They’re insanely strong. He’s wrapped around me with his tail before and even though he was just holding onto me while he was climbing a shelf his grip was insanely strong and I couldn’t get him off of me. Just had to wait til he passed by. After that we don’t put him over our shoulders anymore because he can easily accidentally kill us just by holding onto our neck and squeezing with 1% of his power
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u/Bandag5150 5d ago
That motherfucker will choke you out in a heartbeat. You would be safer having a pack of pit bulls with a pork chop tied around your neck
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u/SixGunZen 4d ago
Why does this idiot think a snake likes to be stroked and petted. Get a dog, idiot. Might wanna get rid of the snake first though.
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u/VooDooDolly717 5d ago
Imagine having to travel 8 feet thru his body when he sh!ts you out....
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u/ImLostAndILikeIt 4d ago
In high school I went to a friends house for the first time. It had a really odd smell to it, kind of like a pet shop/reptile store but there were no visible terrariums anywhere. I was sitting on a futon in his room and felt something bump my foot. I looked down to see a giant python head poking out from under. It startled the shit out of me. I pulled myself together and took a peak and there was two 10-12 foot long pythons underneath. He let them roam freely through the house. Never went back again.
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u/MaximusCanibis 5d ago
Having a pet like that is like being in a relationship with a redhead. You're never sure if its going to turn on you.
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u/Pariah84_ 5d ago
What type of snake is this?
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u/DrWYSIWYG 4d ago
I remember working in ER and a body came in, very dead. He had stuck his head out of a train window and lost it (think those Indian videos but in UK). I was asked to certify him dead which officially involves listening for heart and breathing sounds with a stethoscope and checking pupils. So I listen to the lack of heart beat and then walk the other side of the resuscitation room to check pupils. It was very surreal.
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u/cloisteredsaturn 5d ago
I would love to give it little head pats but jeez, leave the poor thing alone.
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u/JakobiiKenobii 4d ago
I know you're not supposed to play with your food.....but what about when your food plays with you????
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u/Embarrassed-Music-64 4d ago
I had sex with a dude who had one of these free roaming his room. And he kept tryna comfort my by saying she was chill and blind in one eye lmaooo. Shit was pretty terrifying
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u/dend7369 5d ago
I honestly don’t like snakes. But for some reason he/she is soo cute! I wanna give them a snuggle
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u/Competitive-Set5051 5d ago
Rough translation of what he’s saying:
Look, he’ll come if we tickle him
tickle, tickle tickle, look at him
come here
tickle, tickle
There… good boy, hes a good boy
hes so big, his head is…
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u/Airwolfhelicopter 5d ago
“Oh no, it’s going to attack him.”
30 seconds later
“Or maybe not, he’s a good boy!!!”
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u/ComprehensiveEnd248 4d ago
I wanna hold a big snake like I did in school, that thing felt so weird. Like plastic bags full of room temp water and rags, little snakes feel like lizard tails, big snakes soft 😌
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u/RogersPlaces 5d ago
I saw it was a part of python at first but for some reason it started looking like legs with leggings with python pattern lol
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u/tomikos8257 4d ago
Can someone educate me? Do these “pet” snakes actually understand somehow his owner and likes him? Or is it purely “I will feed you, you will not suffocate me” type of deal?
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u/LarrytheGunner57 5d ago edited 5d ago
I wouldn't be surprised if this dude ends up getting eaten in his sleep with the way he's patting and touching that Anaconda
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u/brandonhabanero 5d ago
I thought it was a snake at first, and then I thought it was a thigh in snake scale print leggings, and then realized it was a snake and was horrified that it's that thick
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u/PopPicklesPie 4d ago
I hear a small child in the background. That snake is almost certainly large enough to eat that child.
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u/NaiveSolution_ 5d ago
He don’t experience affection the same way you do mate. These guys look at us like potential food
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u/zssl 5d ago
A lot of snake hate in here. I've had pet snakes before, while it is right that they don't really care about you like a normal pet they are not as dangerous as everyone is saying, IF, and thats a big if, you keep them happy and well fed. Even then one of this size I wouldn't be handling him like this. Tbf I wouldn't get a reticulated python in the first place, I prefer ball pythons they don't get very big and they're super cute. 😊
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u/Different-Chest-5716 5d ago
To any professional: do snakes like petting and affection the same way a dog would?
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u/jenna_beterson 5d ago
Ouch! Are you not supposed to pet upward against the scales? bro is petting him like a dog
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u/BarrelRider621 5d ago
“IS THAT ME?” “IS THAT ME; STRONGER THAN ME?” “I’LL F*CKING KILL ME!”
- Vegeta DBZ Abridged
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u/TaTa_there_retard 5d ago
I don’t know if the snake enjoys that