My partner passed away this morning and I'm distraught

[u/oceaninemotion]

Long-distance relationship, California/Tennessee. Her sibling messaged me this morning with the news.

I want to fly over there to support her mom and sibling so badly, but college resumes on Tuesday and I don't have the money to justify dropping everything when I'm already stretching the buck to stay in LA. Offered to shoulder the cost of her funeral and cremation service regardless.

I feel so deeply guilty and I don't know why. I couldn't have known, but I wish I had been there. We were laughing and joking on Friday about me visiting her for Thanksgiving and now I can't. We were dating for years and I finally made it to the US and now I don't know if I want to continue working here without her.

It hurts so fucking bad. I just hope she knew I wanted to be there to hold her tight before the end.

I miss you already, Ariel.

[u/Exotic-Caterpillar14]

There’s a community for this that you may resonate with more r/widowers