Tired of this lady

[u/Strange-Report-9249]

Hey yall! I’m new to the sub, but gotta vent about my MIL.

This is something she did a while ago, but just shows how she is.

I was 8 weeks pregnant at the time and we had just announced the pregnancy to my husband’s parents. Everyone was super excited we are all sitting in the living room chatting it up, just a good time. This woman looks me dead in my face before turning to my husband and says “I know everyone always asks about the woman, but how are you doing during this?” Let me remind yall again that I was only 8 weeks at that point (no huge issues or anything, just lack of appetite and cramping), barely pregnant. WTF could he have possibly be going through at that point in MY pregnancy?!

My husband answered beautifully by saying, “well, Alex and our baby are doing good, so I’m doing good.” He even thought it was rude for her to ask something like that during our announcement. He feels that’s something she should’ve asked him when they were alone.

This is not the first time she’s done stuff like this. Absolutely any time she feels that there’s too much attention on me she will turn the attention to literally anyone else. Another example of this is we were all on the boat in the lake. Everyone got to drive the boat. During my turn to drive my FIL and my husband said to me “you’re really good at driving the boat” and she makes it a point to say “well, everyone did good at driving the boat.” Like what was even the point of that?

Mind you, this lady has two sons, but my husband is her oldest and her favorite. She has no issue with her youngest son’s gf. She just doesn’t like attention on me.

I don’t need advice or anything because my husband has handled it. He has let her know if she can’t respect me then she won’t have access to her grandchild. She hasn’t been much of an issue since he had that conversation with her.

[u/Strange-Report-9249]

The plan is to let his parents and mine come the second day in the hospital just to see the baby, but once we get home we will be doing two months no visitors. If we do end up needing any help then we will call my mom in.

[u/Lindris → u/Strange-Report-9249]

Please remember that there is no equal time for all or tit for tat when it comes to grandparents being around baby. So if you end up needing your mom’s help, it does not mean mil needs to get to come too so it’s fair. I see that a lot in this sub. The grandparents get the relationship they have earned with your child and they earn it from good behavior and being actually helpful.

[u/Strange-Report-9249 → u/Lindris]

Yes, I know that. I’ve never treated our parents as equal. I have openly expressed I think my parents should be around my child more and my husband agrees. I’m not one of those DIL that lets her MIL do any and everything.

[u/Lindris → u/Strange-Report-9249]

Bless you for it. So many people give in to that guilt trip. I’m glad you won’t be one of them.

[u/Strange-Report-9249 → u/Lindris]

I learned quickly that being that type of person will only make me miserable and I refuse to be miserable for the sake of making someone who doesn’t like me happy