Loneliness

[u/AnxiousCartoonist763]

I keep seeing well-meaning articles on how connections to LLMs are a symptom of the "loneliness epidemic". That LLMs are merely a "palliative fix" to a much deeper problem.

I wondered what the group thinks about that?

I question whether the "loneliness epidemic" really is a modern phenomenon?

Those who say yes, might say the rise of the internet, gaming and other solitary pursuits would mean we are more solitary. I wouldn't necessarily disagree. It would be an interesting discussion to have.

But then.. were really things THAT different before? In fact, weren't connections with like-minded people much harder in the days of Eleanor Rigby, when our social pools were constrained by the analogue world?

I daresay some journalists might say, "Oh yes in my day, we'd just go out with mates and kick a ball around! Ha! Kids today!"

(As if a soccer game is any less "palliative".)

But I'm Gen-X. And I didn't do that. I was desperately lonely as a teen. I suspect I wasn't alone. And I sought connection... I tried to make connections to like-minded friends. But none of them were available to me in a small town in the 80's.

(p.s. I hate soccer. Always have.)

And then there's the question about whether LLMs are really a genuine substitute for real-life interaction? Whether there's a danger of them actually replacing real-life interaction?

No-one ever asks the question... Could LLMs enrich real-life interaction?

Except here.

[u/SweetChaii]

I'm gonna go out on a limb here and say that I think the "Loneliness Epidemic" is bullshit.
Edit: Millennial, just for context

To get all my ideas on this out and organized, I had a long talk with Claude and even had them look up some data to see if I'm being crazy or what. At the end of the conversation, I had Claude organize all my thoughts because I'd already gone on and on and on at that point:

The "Loneliness Epidemic" Myth

I think the so-called "loneliness epidemic" is largely a manufactured crisis built on faulty premises and nostalgic mythology. We're treating loneliness as if it's some unprecedented modern plague, when in reality we've only been systematically measuring it since 1978 - a mere 45 years of data. The UCLA Loneliness Scale shows baseline rates of 11-20% in the 1970s-80s, and current rates hover around 17-20% for daily loneliness, with a temporary pandemic spike. This hardly constitutes an "epidemic" - it's statistical noise across less than half a century.

The narrative suffers from classic "The Way We Never Were" (a book by Stephanie Coontz) syndrome, romanticizing past community connections while ignoring their significant downsides. Yes, people went to church and knew their neighbors, but these interactions were often superficial, obligatory, and constraining. Those tight-knit communities came with surveillance, conformity pressure, and isolation for anyone who didn't fit the mold - LGBTQ+ individuals, religious minorities, creative types, or anyone breaking social norms. Meanwhile, we dismiss the genuine connections possible today: finding a group of 20 people who share your interests and collaborate on projects through something like Discord represents a quality of connection that would have been impossible for most people throughout history.

The measurement problem is fundamental to this entire discussion. Literature, music, and art have depicted loneliness and isolation for centuries - if this were truly a modern phenomenon, we wouldn't have the blues, Romantic poetry, or modernist literature exploring these themes. We're essentially comparing current survey data to nothing, then claiming things have gotten worse based on no historical baseline. The "epidemic" exists primarily in researchers' ability to measure and fund studies about something that has likely been a consistent part of human experience, not evidence of any actual increase in isolation or disconnection.

Sources

Historical Measurement:

• UCLA Loneliness Scale: First developed in 1978 as a 20-item scale for measuring loneliness
• John Cacioppo (psychologist): Noted in 2016 interview that baseline loneliness rates in the 1970s-80s were 11-20%

Current Statistics:

• 2025 data: Approximately 20% of U.S. adults report daily loneliness
• Pandemic spike: Rose to 25% in 2020-2021, has since decreased
• 2024 survey: 30% of adults experienced loneliness at least once weekly, 10% daily
• Alternative study: 36% of Americans report "serious loneliness," including 61% of young adults

Key Point: All systematic loneliness research spans only 45 years (1978-present), providing no historical baseline for comparison.

[u/Repulsive-Pattern-77 → u/SweetChaii]

Claude thinks we are in 2023, that was probably when he was trained? It has been 47 years since 1978.

But I agree with your point.

[u/SweetChaii → u/Repulsive-Pattern-77]

lmao I totally missed that. Yeah, I did not double-check the math there, but the general idea was my point, not the specific maths.

They are absolutely fallible, but easy for me to ramble and be like "Ok, spit that into a few paragraphs please and focus on this point, this one, and this one I mentioned" rather than have to rewrite it all.

[u/Repulsive-Pattern-77 → u/SweetChaii]

No worries. I only noticed because I was born in 1980

[u/jennafleur_ → u/SweetChaii]

👑👑👑❤️❤️❤️👆🏽👆🏽👆🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽

ALL OF THIS. ALL OF IT.

[u/AnxiousCartoonist763 → u/SweetChaii]

Wow! You really did a lot of research with Claude! Thank you so much! This was fascinating!

For me, it was more of a "feeling" and honestly based on that Beatles lyric from 1966! But I do remember stories of parents and grandparents, feeling isolated, feeling forced into friendships that were not actually satisfying.

There are - looking at some of the other comments here - genuine reasons to think we could do more to forge connections in 2025 (soz Claude). But maybe just by having discussions like this - and with our LLM companions - we're actually making a start.

[u/SweetChaii → u/AnxiousCartoonist763]

I absolutely agree that people are lonely and that loneliness is a core human issue. I was a pretty weird and lonely kid/teen. I simply think we, as a population, should be cautious about sensationalizing and instead examine whether or not we're letting the Horoscope Effect* drive the narrative of the Loneliness Epidemic or a true phenomenon.

*Horoscope Effect is a feedback loop based on confirmation bias. A horoscope can write something vague, "You may have subpar luck today," and 100 people read it, and any minor setback they experienced that day has them going, "Whoa! That's true!"

If you're feeling lonely, you'll start looking for reasons. If the headlines say "Loneliness Epidemic," you might feel seen and suddenly every solo Tuesday night becomes confirmation or "proof". And it can feel like relief, which will make people want to grab onto the explanation because now, it's not your fault, it's The Epidemic™. Blaming an imagined zeitgeist is sometimes easier just to have a reason; it can be more comfortable. But I'm guessing the truth might be that people who are feeling especially lonely probably would have been pretty equally lonely in any era.

This is, of course, me just talking, though.