r/ShitAmericansSay • u/InternationalBat1838 Indian who's called the usual names • 2d ago
Food This is why America is the number 1 country in the United States. Let's gooo baby!
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u/Quicker_Fixer From the Dutch socialistic monarchy of Europoora š³š± 2d ago
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u/Gothrait_PK 2d ago
So like slightly more than half of the US..? There's like 38% inside "poorly educated" that talk like they are entirely uneducated lol.
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u/Slow_Description_773 2d ago edited 2d ago
It's true, because at least once you'll get an heart attack from eating that crap you will have to pay the hospital with your own money rather than the ones we pool with taxes back in EU.
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u/Beagle432 2d ago
The expression: that costs an arm and a leg??
In US it is: that costs a house and your credit rating2
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u/lakas76 2d ago
It does look good though. I personally wouldnāt eat it, at least not all of it, but it does look tasty.
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u/GoldenBhoys 2d ago
I would once after a proper session and love it, but would wake up feeling worse than I had cheated on my wife.
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u/BaitmasterG 2d ago
Don't worry, your wife was whispering to me the other day that she's ok with cheating
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u/Medium_Trade8371 Australian 2d ago
There must be something wrong with your eyesight. It looks like shit and vomit to me.
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u/Practical_Repeat5009 2d ago
itās a burger with cheese and onions šš itās just a monstrosity of a burger with cheese and onions
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u/Medium_Trade8371 Australian 2d ago
You keep telling yourself that. My condolences to your family.
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u/Practical_Repeat5009 2d ago
iām not eating this monstrosity. but it does look tasty. which doesnāt change the fact itās a heart attack on bread š
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u/lakas76 2d ago
Itās hamburger, grilled onions, and cheese. I donāt see the shit or vomit. Maybe you have really good looking vomit?
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u/Medium_Trade8371 Australian 2d ago
I'm not answering. The last thing I want is another argument about what deranged people eat, drink or cook.
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u/Western-Calendar-352 2d ago
āWhere would this country be without this great nation of ours.ā
Ronald Reagan
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u/Sexy_farm_animals 2d ago
There's an old saying in Tennessee ā I know it's in Texas, probably in Tennessee ā that says, fool me once, shame on ā shame on you. Fool me ā you can't get fooled again. George Bush
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u/ducktape8856 1d ago
I miss the days US Presidents only said stupid things once in a while. Even Dubya was quite boring. Boring is good.
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u/No-Minimum3259 4h ago
Well US politics is boring and predictabla as well: seldom in favor of the people.
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u/SgtTreehugger 2d ago
Guys... That's an obvious joke...
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u/eifiontherelic 2d ago
Also I'd admittedly want to try that burger once and never again.
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u/NoManufacturer7372 2d ago
Iām not even tempted to try it once.
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u/eifiontherelic 2d ago
And that's fine. I'd have to mentally and physically prepare myself to eat this thing, given the chance anyway.
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u/No_Necessary_3356 hAhA eUrOpoOr!!! 2d ago
Good wish because you won't be in a condition to try it a second time anyways
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u/Bulky-Adeptness7997 2d ago
Hm with some Americans you never know these days you did it to yourself you guys set the bar so low noone can tell if it's real or not. Alone the realistic possibility is sad for americans.
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u/-UnseenCat-030 2d ago
I mean, with blatant, over the top, flashy nationalism on the rise, the joke isn't even THAT obvious tbf. Nationalism, as a sentiment, will often reward rather silly statements as long as they are patriotic because if you say something dumb out of patriotism, you're not ignorant, you're just "candide", "innocent", "uncorrupted by the world" or "have a wonderous, childlike faith".
So yes, it's definitely a joke, but imo it still fits the sub very well, exactly because in our current day and age, it's not always clear wether a statement like that is serious or not.
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u/Bradamante-kun 2d ago
I've had complaints at my retail job over mistaking an idiotic statement for a joke. The person was asking for live performances of a composer playing his own music. They were offended when I pointed out that the composer died before recording technology existed.
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u/HeadMoose 2d ago
American (Yank) here: checks out. Most people know f*ckall about geography. And it is getting worse...quickly.
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u/Terminusaquo 2d ago
Number 1 for obesity and heart attacks maybe. š¤
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u/Master-Dot-2288 2d ago
America is absolutely the number one country at everything in the United States, brother.... only one country makes up the United States.
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u/Organic_Mechanic_702 2d ago
Did you throw that up?...Oh sorry thats American 'food' isn't...no wonder life expectancy is lower...
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u/Mastamindcook 2d ago
As an American I don't even find this to be satire lol. I think most of these fools actually think this stuff for real and worse tbh š¤Æš«£
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u/randomthrowaway8993 2d ago
Because we're dumb enough to willingly give ourselves a heart attack for a few moments of mediocre enjoyment? Yeah I guess that kind of makes sense
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u/Gysburne 2d ago
Ah yeah.. my bottle is the number one in the liquid.
First... "The United States is the number 1 in America."
Second... that is subjective.
Third... "The United States is probably 35th of the 35 sovereign countries in America."
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u/Hydrangeia 2d ago
Guys, we donāt have to take obvious jokes seriously. They say a lot of dumb shit already. Chill.
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u/notAugustbutordinary 2d ago
I admit I do really enjoy a good burger occasionally. For all I know this burger tastes really good, but genuinely that picture looks like someone has picked up a turd with a flattened bread bun.
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u/bindermichi ooohh! custom flair!! 2d ago
Itās also the only country in the United States⦠soooo r/technicallythetruth
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u/matt-r_hatter 2d ago
Im not sure having extremely yummy cheeseburgers is what does the trick... lots of countries have really good food. That does look good though.
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u/iTmkoeln Cologne native, Hamburg exicled - Europoor šŖšŗ 2d ago
Only trust it if exactly this is added to Orange Manās diet every meal for the rest of his life
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u/Candid_Code7024 2d ago
You know what I think when i hear - breaking news from America - I think
A) What is Trump doing/saying now that is mad
B) How many kids have died in the latest mass shooting
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u/glarbung 2d ago
Fun fact: the US is tied for first place when ranking countries by people per capita.
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u/JagsFan_1698 Sadly an American 2d ago
Theyāre correct, United States is the #1 country in the United States
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u/-Generaloberst- 2d ago
That looks as if someone had to puke, scrapped of the street and put it in something that should be bread?
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u/BigN1sfa š¬š· Greek Europ**r š¤®š¤®š¤¢š¤¢ 2d ago
Why is this sub recently getting filled with stuff that look like jokes?
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u/Standard_Jackfruit63 2d ago
At least this one doesnt pretend to know that the rest of the world exists.
When that is said, this statement almost seems like something someone outside of the US would say to get into this sub
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u/Philsie136 2d ago
Itās a sad fact that this sort of nonsense contributes to the ever growing (pun intended) Obesity crisis, Put another way your the number 1 fat cunts in the world.
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u/damnnewphone 2d ago
Number one out of one is both first place and last place. Congratulations amarica, you get two awards.
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u/Rustyguts257 2d ago
Umm, I live in that nice condo called Canada just above the meth lab known as the USA. I had a better hamburger at a local restaurant last night. Please donāt tell me the USA āinventedā the hamburger - putting a hunk of meat between two pieces of bread was a thing before 1776 as was apple pie and motherhood but I digress.
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u/Possible-Zone904 2d ago
And the dumbassery keeps on rolling, no end to this stupido train. Keep eating trash like that, and keep heart disease number one!
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u/Dmpoaod_v2 2d ago
One of the rare occasions when american is somewhat right. Also one of the not-so-rare occasions when american while being somewhat right is also somehow completely wrong xD
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u/Sxn747Strangers 2d ago
So many health problems to choose from, so so many? š¤£
Theyāre also a major buyer on the mobility scooter market, go figure! š¤š¤
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u/MessyRaptor2047 2d ago
How flexible is this guy because he clearly loves to kiss his own backside.
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u/Balseraph666 2d ago
I feel like vomiting just from seeing that. My arteries are crying in pain just from the sight of it.
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u/robfuscate 2d ago
Looks like somebody clapped in a bun and the Capitalists sold it as food ⦠oh wait ā¦
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u/Desperate_Ship_4283 2d ago
But outside america, people do not want to eat something that looks like dogshit
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u/ElectronicDingo836 2d ago
World Series champions every freakin year, No other country has ever won it, everā¦.American Exceptionalā¦
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u/deedee2148 2d ago
Look, I enjoy a greasy burger once in awhile like a lot of people but that just looks gross and way too much.Ā
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u/SatchSaysPlay 2d ago
Ohh ohh is it an authoritarian government? So cool /s Best part is from the administrations point of view, the public are making excuses for their tyrannical behaviour lmfao Just incredible
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u/crankyticket 2d ago
Maybe Trump was onto something about building a wall. We need one that goes right around the entire United States to keep the madness in.
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u/Expensive_Laugh_5589 1d ago
America might be the number one in the US, but it's still smaller than Texas
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u/Key_Natural_2881 1d ago
Kinda looks vaguely like food, but is a guaranteed retirement plan for a cardiologist.
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u/No-Minimum3259 4h ago
Strange: what I see happening these days in the US, doesn't look like a number 1 country. It looks more like scenes from The Turner diaries.
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u/DefinitionOfAsleep The 13 Colonies were a Mistake 2d ago
For heart disease?
That actually looks really oily.
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u/Morlakar 2d ago
I can't argue that.