r/YouShouldKnow • u/LtSoundwave • Jul 19 '20

Other YSK That many people with a disability consider their aides (wheelchair, etc.) an extension of themselves. You should ask before touching or moving them.

Read this article and was surprised to hear how many people struggle with this. Even if you are trying to help, you should ask first.

www.bbc.com/news/disability-49584591

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u/[deleted] Jul 19 '20 edited Jul 19 '20

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u/Ein_Maschinengewehr Jul 19 '20

Get her a walker for christmas (if you plan on giving her a gift and it's in your budget, obviously), see if she gets the message.

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u/[deleted] Jul 19 '20

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u/[deleted] Jul 19 '20

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u/J3ST3RR Jul 20 '20

Yeah your mom sounds like a bit of a cunt

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u/[deleted] Jul 20 '20

Fuck her. Those are your wheels and you need to sit up for yourself. If she's whining about your speed tell her to go alone. You're an independent adult and so is she.

Also. Buy her the damn rollator regardless. Give her a walking aid and then remove the handles from the chair. Saw the damn things off if you have to. Cover them with zip ties with the free end cut at jagged angles, all criss crossed around it. Do whatever, but make your point. She isn't pushing you because you're slow, she's just too proud and cheap to get a proper aid.

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u/ShesMeLMFAO Jul 20 '20

It's not easy to get out of a codependent relationship with a parent, especially when you have a disability.

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u/Noinipo12 Jul 19 '20

Sounds like you could use a Smart Drive or other power assist device. I just wish they weren't so damn expensive.

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u/[deleted] Jul 19 '20

Slap on some of these bad boys and see if she grabs your handles ever again lol

https://www.etsy.com/listing/768559885/spiked-faux-or-real-leather-wheelchair

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u/doobiee Jul 20 '20

You should be grateful for a mother that will still push you around constantly, every day, as well as taking care of your other needs. Like, that is brutal on a mom. Yet you want to embarass her at a funeral for touching your wheelchair. You kinda sound like the cunt here. Your wheelchair is an extension of you, but you have become an extension of her.

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u/[deleted] Jul 20 '20

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u/doobiee Jul 20 '20

I will apologize for being slightly rude. I have disabled friends, one of who is a real piece of work, and I was reminded of his behavior and I may have let that in my head when I posted my comment. Def a conversation you need to have with her, but I still think embarrassing someone at a funeral is a cunt thing to do.