Im 16F and about a month ago a started talking to a guys that I met on the last day of a cruise. He lives a state away from me and he seemed really nice. We called almost every night after the cruise and texted all the time. Last night he asked if I could send a pic of me playing with myself, so I said sure and sent him one. It wasn’t THAT bad, it was just my hand in my underwear, but he immediately texted back that he’d leak it if I didn’t send more. That was the first time I ever sent nudes to somebody, so I begged him not to before blocking him on everything. I’ve been thinking abt it all day, Idk if I should’ve done something else, help pls😭

my friend (17f) was raped by a man 2 months ago. i have been friends with her since we were 5 so being there for her is a no brainer. i have been there to support and help since the day it happened and everyone around us is also very supportive of her. along with this, her parents are going through a divorce right now so there is lots of negative emotions and stress for her. a few days ago, she told me that her boyfriend (18m) was hinting at breaking up with her and she asked me to talk to him to understand what he was thinking. i have been friends with him since we were 10 and have also been pretty close with him so i really just wanted to see what was going on between my two close friends in a time of vulnerability. he told me straight up that he loves her so so much but he is 100% willing to break up with her if she doesn't have sex with him in the next few days or weeks. i genuinely don't know what to do because A. he knows about her rape and was one of the first people in the hospital with us, B. if i tell her i'm so scared that she's gonna hurt herself or something because she's already going through so much due to all the things she's processing right now, and C. what?? who threatens a relationship for sex after a traumatic time?? i don't even know if she can have sex because of all the physical trauma she has suffered in her body.

just to clear anything up, her birthday is in early september and his is in late august so there isn't any big age gap.

any advice would be appreciated

I’m at a complete loss, my entire world crashed this weekend when I found out my wife has been having an affair. I never saw it coming. My wife wants to work on our relationship but I don’t know how to forgive or forget what she did. For those who have had a spouse cheat, if you got back together, how were you able to overcome the hurt, embarrassment and anger?

Hey.

I work for a software company as an accountant. I get a long very well with some of the tech guys and everyone is really nice. Honestly one of the more positive workplaces I've been at.

Last weekend, my personal computer came up with what the guys referred to as the blue screen of death. When I was looking up how to fix it, I wasn't sure how to proceed because I was scared I was going to lose some of my dad's photos I still have of him.

I mentioned it on Monday to one of the techs. They said to bring it in and he'd have a look at it. He managed to get the photos and files backed up and reloaded it. So it was like the PC was out of the box experience and he gave me the photos on a USB and he placed them on a folder on the desktop. Another tech set up one drive for me so if this happened again. I'd have everything on the cloud.

My boyfriend works in marketing. He's not a programmer, software engineer, IT guy or anything like that for context. But he's upset with me that I wouldn't even let him try.

It's just my late father's photos we're on this PC. He was googling stuff with me and just as confused as I was on how to fix it. We've been arguing and I just feel like as if he's getting worked up over nothing.

My fiancé (36m) and I (35f) have been dating for five years. He proposed a few months ago and literally within the same week my mom was diagnosed with end stage emphysema and congestive heart failure. She’s been in and out of hospitals non-stop since. At first she was given 6 months but she’s been responding fairly well to treatments. We’re still not sure what her timeline is but we’re kind of expecting it could be any day or at least within the upcoming year.

Here’s where my dilemma is. My mom really wanted us to fast track a wedding so she could see us get married before she goes. We scheduled something small and intimate in October. I bought a dress and everything. But after thinking about it, I just realized I don’t want to get married. My fiancé has been dealing with some addiction issues that he’s working on getting help for but I’m still trying to decide if I even want to stay together. (That’s my own battle and I’m working on that)

My question though is how do I break the news to my dying mother that we’ve decided to cancel the wedding?

UPDATE AT THE BOTTOM:

A friend of my husband’s asked if he (29M) & his daughter (4F) could temporarily move in with my husband (31M) & I (29F) for a few months (he said no more than 6 months). This friend only has his child 50% of the time due to an agreement he has with his ex. This friend is one of my husband’s best friends. He stated that he is strapped very thin for cash as of late with starting his new job. He asked if we would be willing to take him in for the next few months while he gets back on his feet. Before anyone asks, he has no history of substance abuse & yes, he has family in the area. So with him asking us, I know he has considered every other option, even family, before asking us. He has offered to help out with expenses, groceries, house projects, etc., which would help us out as we continue some small renovations. My husband asked me if we could take them in & without hesitating, I said absolutely, because they are family & we help out family in need. We live in a decent sized house with 2 extra bedrooms that aren’t currently occupied, no kids yet, have one dog & have plenty of land.

I’m not asking people to talk me out of this as we are going to help him out, but what I am looking for advice on is: what types of rules or boundaries should we have/put in place? I’m not saying we don’t trust him, but I want us to take every precaution taking in a friend who is having money troubles & is struggling.

So far I have thought of: if this starts to affect our marriage, he’s out since our marriage comes first; getting written permission from the child’s mother for her to live with us part time (I used to work for Child Services & don’t need an angry parent coming after me or my husband); locking up all valuables in our safe; locking away firearms due to a child being in the house; allowing his GF over to hangout but not to sleepover since we don’t know her & we have firearms/valuables in the house—plus not giving our house code or key to anyone; but that’s all I can think of at the moment.

My husband has been busy helping out a family member the last few days with some house projects so we haven’t had time to discuss in detail any of the specifics yet, like how much rent will be, what will household chores look like, what looking after his child will look, etc. I want to be prepared with ideas for the conversation with my husband when he gets home & for later on, the conversation with the friend who wants to move in. I want to have a strong sense of rules, boundaries & expectations to present him with.

Any thoughts or ideas you all may have would be greatly appreciated, thanks in advance!

UPDATE: thank you all SO MUCH for your comments, suggestions, etc. the positive & the negative ones. They are all super helpful! I feel like I should add a few things:

•He & his ex do not have a legal custody agreement. They have had 50/50 custody since they split 3 years ago with no issues, but that is why I said I wanted her approval for her daughter to live here, since there’s nothing legally binding. •He has a stable job. In the 5-6 years I’ve known him, he’s worked 2 places. He has never had these money issues before but this new job doesn’t pay as much & he knew that going into it. •He currently has a place to live & is living there. We could help him out with his rent & that is something I will discuss with my husband. •I will 100% be asking him why he can’t stay with family & based on his response will dictate if we actually let him stay or not. Y’all are right about it being a red flag if family won’t take him in. But honestly, in the years I’ve known him, I would say it’s more so his family that is the problem, not him. •He & his daughter will have separate bedrooms located on our second floor & will use the second floor bathroom. •We are going to draw up a lease/agreement with a HARD end date along with a 30 day notice clause stating that any of us can end the agreement, which gives him 30 days to leave. •People said if we have this many rules, he won’t want to stay. Okay fine, don’t stay lol. He asked us & we said yes. If he can’t agree to sign our agreement, he doesn’t need someplace to stay that bad. •Groceries will be paid for separately. •Chores will be enforced. •I will NOT be a babysitter. If I offer to watch her, that is one thing but he will remain her sole caretaker when she is here. •There will be no overnight guests whatsoever. This will help break up his nights spent here. I know he will want to go to his girlfriends & spend the night. This will break up his days long streak of staying over. Plus we have ring cameras that record when people come in & out.

I feel like there’s more but that’s all I have for now. I have read all of your comments & suggestions even if I haven’t responded. I have written sooo many of them down & plan on presenting my list of worries & expectations to my husband. We will come up with an agreement together based off of this list you all helped me create. Then we will meet with our friend & talk everything over & very clearly lay out our expectations. I’ll keep yall posted. Thank you again, so much!

So I’m 18m I just walked out of this coffee shop I randomly went into and saw this girl who was around the same age as me and we talked for a bit and she even gave me some of the pastry they made and extra toppings on my coffee she seemed like she was into me but I’m just a little bad at reading that kind of thing so I’m not sure if I should go back and try to talk to her but from our conversation I am extremely into her lol

Edit: turns out she was into me and when she asked for my name for the order she just put that in instagram and she followed and dm’d a lil weird but oh well

He’s like my brother and we’re so close, but he has terminal cancer. I’m living in the present, making memories with him, but how am I supposed to move on when the time comes? What do I do when it’s too difficult to get out of bed in the mornings when he’s gone? How do I combat the depression and grief that comes with loss? By the way we’re both 16. He’s just a kid. FUCK CANCER

He was shot at 9 times by a “friend” that he had since he was younger. He was shot once in the arm and once in the chest. By the time anyone knew anything had happened, he was dead. My boys (twins) know that he’s “in heaven with mawmaw”, but that’s all they know. They’ve made a comment about “the bad man that slapped their daddy into heaven” I guess from hearing me on and off of the phone trying to get things figured out. They didn’t go to his mother’s funeral because we both agreed that we didn’t want their last memory of her to be of her in a casket. But this is their father. This is something that is going to affect them for the rest of their lives. I’m torn because I don’t know if their little brains can handle something this big right now. I don’t know if it could cause some kind of long term damage. But I also don’t want them to wake up one morning as teenagers and feel like they were robbed of seeing their father being buried. The only close blood relatives they have left on their dad’s side are their father’s aunt and uncle. And that’s it. I want to do what’s best for them long term, but I’m so upset I can’t even think or sleep. I don’t know what to do. Please give me some advice.

We co-taught prekindergarten. He was arrested during the work day. We taught together last year and he was an amazing teacher. We were really close friends, I loved him (non-romantic). The charges include producing and possessing child porn <13 years old. He's being held without bail. It seems undeniable and I'm heartbroken and devasted by the betrayal. I can't explain the grief of losing someone who did something evil. I've been having panic attacks and I'm struggling to return to work. I'm trying to start therapy. How do friends and family cope with learning they have a sex offender in their life?

I’ve been in this situationship for a few months now. We weren’t official, but we were definitely more than just casual. We’d spend weekends together, stay up stupid late talking, sometimes crash at each other’s places, and it always felt like there was this unspoken connection. He would open up about his family, his career stress, even some personal regrets, and I thought, okay, he trusts me.

But out of nowhere, he just… left. No conversation, no “I don’t think this is working,” not even a basic text saying goodbye. He just slipped out of my life like none of it ever mattered.

I’m 18, I’ve dealt with casual flings before, but this doesn’t feel like that. I can’t stop asking myself if I imagined the intimacy we shared. I don’t know if I should reach out for closure or if that would just embarrass me more.

Part of me wants to let it go, but part of me still waits for him to come back like maybe the story isn’t over.

I’m 23 (will be 24 in a few months…🥴) and have never had sex or had a relationship with a boy. What am I doing wrong? Why is it so hard for me to get a guy to pursue me or show any interest? I hate the way I look and I always have so that may have something to do with it. I’m tired of being told to “be confident” though and that it’ll happen when I least expect it. The fact of the matter is I’m just not conventionally attractive. I never get approached and it has always bothered me. It sucks.

I (18F) have been seeing this guy casually for a few months as FWB. At first it was fine because we both knew it was just casual and not serious. Recently though, he started saying he wants us to be exclusive. I didn’t expect that since we never really talked about anything serious, but I thought maybe his feelings were changing.

The thing is, even though he’s talking about exclusivity, he still flirts with some of my friends. Little things like joking around, sending memes that feel flirty, and making compliments when we hang out. When I brought it up, he just said it’s ‘not that deep’ and that I’m overthinking it.

I feel disrespected and honestly confused. I don’t want to overreact, but I also don’t want him to expect me to be exclusive while treating me like a casual option. I’m not sure if I should have a serious talk, set firmer boundaries, or just walk away.

Has anyone been in a situation like this? How would you handle it?

Hi guys I need advice as a 17 year old who feels genuinely so helpless.

A long story short: - a sexual assault occurred on my road and residents were given a letter stating this (although the incident had happened a month prior to being given it?) and were given a description of a black male going by the name of let’s say “George” (not the name of the real man) - a few months later whilst outside on the street (dark but not late) with my female family (three of us) a black male approaches. The best way I can describe the way he approached us is like a predator approaching prey circling us and giving us the Kubrick stare his hands up like he’s innocent and has no bad intentions saying “what?” like we’re crazy for being clearly terrified, until a man we knew came and he immediately disbursed. We thought of calling the tip line on the letter but the tip line closed basically at midday when all of us are busy so there is physically no way of getting into contact with them. Also what do we say? He was being creepy? That because he was black we just assumed it MUST be him?
- we move on a few months later my sister is sat outside by herself in front of our house. A man (the same man from the night before, although she didn’t know it was him 100% because it was dark) walking down the hill of our road stares at her as he walks even as he passes he continues to stare until he turns around and approaches her and introduces himself as GEORGE as if to hit on her. My sister immediately starts filming and he immediately runs away (suspicious). We call the police and tell them and bring up the letter however they have no record and are insinuating that the letter was somehow faked?????? We have a picture of it!!!! - this week my father sees the man out and follows him home. I know his exact address and have found his exact apartment from an estate agent website.

Question is what do I do? I’m terrified and the police aren’t doing anything.

I have spent a couple of evenings with my best friend’s brother, not necessarily planned but just ended up spending time together (getting drunk/stoned) for context we are both 28F he’s 27. For me it is completely platonic and we’re just talking shit and hanging out but I can’t tell if it’s made my bestie uncomfortable, although I have asked her and she said it was fine.

Should I back off or is this okay?

I started this FWB thinking it would be light and simple, but it’s turning into something I didn’t sign up for. At first everything was fine, but lately he’s started showing behavior that feels way too controlling.

He gets jealous if I talk to other guys, even just friends. He’s told me not to hang around certain people and asks where I’m going or who I’m with. If I don’t reply to his messages quickly, he’ll bring it up and make me feel guilty. He’s made comments like “If you were really into me, you wouldn’t need anyone else” and “You shouldn’t be messing with other people if you’re with me,” even though he’s the one who keeps saying we’re not exclusive.

It’s confusing because he still insists it’s “just casual” whenever I question things, but his actions say otherwise. I feel like he wants all the control of being a boyfriend without any of the responsibility that comes with it.

I don’t know if I should confront him, cut things off, or try to set stricter boundaries. I don’t want drama, but I also don’t want to feel trapped in something I never agreed to. How do I handle this the best way?

So my brother(24) and his gf(20) met only a few months ago, and her family is against this marriage. (So she basically left her family for him.) But they insisted on living together and getting married so everything happened so fast. Yesterday i found out that my brother is texting his ex-gf. They were pretty intimate, even if they weren't that's still cheating since he's still in touch with her after all that time. What if he continues to text and even meet her after marriage? Only I know what happened, I didn't say anything to anyone. They are getting married today and I don't know what to do.

They just can’t understand that we dont want it and that we wont eat that much and some things we dont like. We have 27 jars of fruit jam, 4 jars of honey. today they brought us a full sheet of cake and so many jars of pickles and 5 bottles of furit sirup and around 5 lbs of plumps. We dont eat / drink that and i feel sorry to throw it away. I tried to offer my neighbors, but we live in the city center, so its not common i guess, they politely refused. Last time I put a few bottles of jam in front of the entrance with a "donate" sign, but no one took it. They call us ungrateful, and i get it - they were poor as kids so they now accumulate everything. But i am depperate. We have small kitchen and its not minimalistic anymore (they even buy us more and more cups and jars as they think we had not enough) and i feel overwhelmed.

I was dancing with a girl the other night and I thought it was going well and we were vibing, but then her friend comes up and she just kind of left abruptly. I’m worried that I made her uncomfortable or nervous and I feel really bad. Should I message her to apologize? Honestly, I don’t care if she isn’t interested in me and I just want to make sure I didn’t make her uneasy or anything. Because if I did, I don’t want to repeat that mistake.

I wasn't allowed to ask this on any book-related sub, so here I am. I've been considering reading Animal Farm by George Orwell (jorjor wel), but I don't want to read it if it's not... good... for lack of a better word. I've just begun consistently reading so I don't really know much about literature, although I've read some classics and also many of Shakespeare's works. What can you tell me about the book without spoiling it? Can you rate it on a scale from 1-10 and explain why? I really want to make sure it's something I'm interested in reading because I only like to read physical copies of books, and I insist on buying my own copies of all the books I read, so, you know. All responses are appreciated!

I have a long-time male friend we go way way back. Recently he got flirty out of the blue and then made a physical move tha tmade me really uncomfortable. I told him directly I wasn’t okay with it and I want to keep things friendly and in a safe distance. He laughed and said I was “overreacting,” which made me feel I I tried a really clear “no” in the moment. Since then I’ve pulled back a bit, but haven’t had a sit-down or talk with him ever since

I want to feel safe and respected with him and dont really want to end on a bad note as well without a talk honestly

Should I give one last, direct boundary conversation + consequences saying like if this happens again i will never talk or communicate ever gain, or is it healthier to end it all right now?

I've only been at my job for 4 days and im a cna trainee. I just finished the online class for it, they have me working in the acute care ward where most of them are comfort care. For the past 3 days only myself and 1 other coworker have shown up for work on my wing and the cnas on the other wings dont want to come to my wing. There's 36 residents on my side tonight I was told I had to do all of the 1 person care alone. It is nonstop care for 8 hours with no time to even go to the bathroom or have a drink of water. If I say anything I get pegged as not wanting to do my job but im afraid I'll accidentally hurt someone. What do I do?

A mutual friend of ours made a really racist comment and dropped a meme about it a couple of months ago. I thought he was kinda ostracized because of it, but my friend and i had a talk about on friday and started defending him. Saying things like, oh it wasnt THAT bad, hes just ignorant, or that hes sorry about it (we never got an apology from him)

We got into an argument because i'm of the race that he memed on. It was a very offensive meme, i'm not that sensitive but racial hate or racial roasting is where i draw the line. I said i dont get why they were defending him when both of us are actually of the race he memed on. It was done in front of our face and still they defended them about what happened. I tried to say that them defending him is really fucking invalidating and idk why the empathy is on him and not us. It wasnt until after we went over what happened again that they said sorry.

I've kinda lost trust in this friend and i dont know how to go forward with this. Even if they apologized, it makes me really question why someone who was clearly in the wrong and offended many other people there was being defended. I dont know whether to continue this friendship or not. Any thoughts?

Hi. On a throwaway because I don't want people who know me to see me talk about this shit because I'm ashamed of it.

I don't know why I just realized this, but I feel as if there is something wrong with me.

I've been into true crime/crime scene photos/things like that ever since I was a child, maybe around 6-7 years old when I had unlimited access to the internet. My parents never checked what I watched or anything and I used to watch a lot of crime videos. This led me down to finding sites that showed the actual bodies of those victims, and even as a child, it never made me feel disgusted or anything that some people may feel when they see something like that. I used to watch gore videos and everything as well (the gauntlet challenge, if yk, yk.)

I'm F20 now, and I still do this. Sometimes, it makes me sad to think of all the shit people in this world, and it makes me anxious. What if something like this happens to me? How many people are dying right now from something like this? It scares me, but the photos themselves don't phase me, I guess. I actively search things like this often sometimes as well as I still watch gore stuff sometimes, sometimes for fun, sometimes because I saw someone on reddit talking about something to do with a crime or gore and I get intrigued. Sometimes, for as long as I can remember, I'd imagine it happening to me and I still wouldn't feel anything.

I realized that there is something wrong with me. I don't know what to do. I can't get therapy if that's something I need to do because I can't afford it. I don't want to tell anyone around me about this, because who the fuck watches gore like this?? Why am I like this??

I've been feeling like shit, and I feel horrible because of how disrespectful it is to see those bodies of these victims and not feeling anything and looking for them. These people suffered and I can't even be bothered to not look for the bodies. I feel like shit and Idek where else to post this other than getting advice. I'm fine with people ripping me a new one as well, because at this point, I deserve it for watching these people suffer. I know how bad it is, but I still look for it. Maybe there is no help for me. Maybe there is and I hope there is.

Thank you for reading if you read this far, i know this is a deeper subject and I'm sorry if it's too deep for this subreddit, I can gladly delete it if needed.