I kind of miss embalming!

I ended up getting laid off by my firm earlier in the year and due to a personal situation have not returned to work, and weirdly some days I find myself missing embalming.

I didn’t hate it while working, but it wasn’t always something I looked forward to (especially when the bodies were a challenge), but I do miss those easy straight cases!

As one of my coworkers put it, there was some solace in having the prep room to yourself where you weren’t bothered with other tasks and didn’t have to worry about the phone or people walking in.

Just had to come on here and say it, no one IRL would understand as I don’t know any funeral directors hahah.

Does anyone have experience with Legacy Memorial Group, Legacy Cremation Group, Legacy Funeral Group, Legacy Lane Urns? Perhaps associated with Broylman Memorial or Anthem Partners?

Looks like Legacy Cremation was previously called Heritage Cremation.

It looks like they outsource their calls for removal, transportation, cremation and mailing.

I wasn’t sure what other group I could ask. I’m not a funeral director but I do make headstones. I want to decorate my office for spooky season but am finding myself maybe a little hesitant because I don’t want to be insensitive. Obviously I’m not going to put fake bodies or anything like that, but how do you juggle holiday spirit with grief stricken families? Pics of the exterior of my office incase anything immediate comes to mind (whether ideas of things to do, or definitely do NOT do). Appreciate any help!

Hello there!! I live in Oregon, and I am going to apply for a part time apprenticeship at my town's funeral home soon, but I have never had a job before so I am super nervous about interviewing and am trying to learn as much as I can to be prepared. I did do a job shadow at this funeral home once however, so I think I have a little bit of a foot in the door when it comes to applying. I have a lot of questions and was hoping I could get at least a few answered on this subreddit.. I am a bit new to reddit, so hopefully I am doing this right, but here goes:

Will I be doing public speaking as an apprentice?

What is some advice for speaking with a client who is upset or angry, or simply grief ridden?

How do I express both professionalism and compassion while consoling a person in grief?

Is shedding tears considered unprofessional and something I should avoid at all costs?

I am a little shy and find speaking to be sometimes difficult thanks to growing up during COVID, is there any advice I could use to be more comfortable with speaking naturally?

Is it required to wear make up as a woman to be professional?

What length should I keep my nails and what colors are acceptable to paint them?

What hair styles are considered professional and acceptable?

Is dyed hair okay as long as it is a natural color like red, black, or blonde?

What type of earrings/jewelry are allowed?

Are there other colors besides black that are okay to wear?

One of my white button up shirts is slightly see-through but not overtly, so like if a guy was wearing it I’d imagine it’d be okay. However, I am a woman, hence I have to wear a bra underneath. The bra I have is pristine white, but you can still see the straps a little as well as part of the tops of the cups. My mother says this is okay when I asked her, but I have my doubts and am wondering if I need to wear a vest or something on top just in case?

What should I specifically avoid wearing?

As a woman, are ties considered okay or tacky?

What should I research before the job?

What sort of questions will they ask me at the interview?

Is there any other advice or important information I should know about before beginning to work at the funeral home?

Sorry this is a bit long. If anyone is willing to answer any of these questions or give advice, I would appreciate it tremendously. Thank you to anyone who reads this.

Location: Florida

It looks like there has been an ownership change at the funeral home / cemetery.

The new owner is saying the old owner was very sloppy with paperwork. He isn’t willing to honor anything stated in emails only what is in the contract. The emails state embalming is included with what I paid for.

The new owner charges 395 for refrigeration (48 hours) and 200 a day storage after that.

This was added after and was not on contract. I’m trying to locate a price list from the old owner. Do the have to go with the old price list or the new policies/price list?

I stated in emails I wanted to prepay for everything upfront 4 years ago.

I am unsure if this is allowed here but was curious to know if anyone is interested in work at a family owned firm.

Hello funeral professionals! I am in Virginia--my spouse is military and we may retire/be moving to Massachusetts or New York state--and am in the very early stages of planning my funeral. I am 49.

I searched and didn't see this asked before.

I've read that pets experience grief. I have a cat and a dog and I am my cat's person and he is my best fur friend. As I am working out the details for pre-paying and preplanning for my funeral (and their eventual end of lives/funerals), and while doing so it occurred to me that should I go first, my furry family members may be confused. I think our cat is pretty darn smart but the dog is who I am most concerned for.

I think if my pets were allowed to see my remains that the cat would at least understand what's happened. (I'd like to think our dog would also understand but I'm not so sure about him!)

Has anyone ever made arrangements for their pets to have visitation? Is this even thought of or done at all? (I'm going to take a guess and say no)

How would I even plan for this? I'm assuming just ask the funeral home I'm considering and make sure they're okay with it or allow pets to briefly visit? I' in no way saying I'd want them there for the entire viewing, just a few minutes so they can see me, smell me, and get some kind of closure.

Thank you in advance for any advice and thoughts you have on these questions.

Hey there, this fall I will be graduating from a state college (NY) with my BA in Anthropology and a minor in Communications. My long-term goal is to be a funeral director, but outside of my bachelors I don't have a specific funeral service degree or any licensing. I know the degree is necessary in my state, but I'm not looking to take out more student loans anytime soon (hopefully I can pay for it myself after a few years of working) and I was wondering what my immediate next steps should be in trying to get a Big Girl Job? I'd be happy just answering phones at a funeral home if it means getting one foot in the door. Luckily, I live near a medium-sized city, so there's a handful of homes I can apply to. I guess I'm asking you all if hiring a freshly graduated 20yo is something you would even entertain, or if I absolutely should go get the required degree first. Is there a position for someone like me at a funeral home? What should my next steps be before I graduate in December? Thank you so much!!!

How much do you make working full time as a crematory operator?

What about at sci?

Hey y’all, I don’t know if this is the right place to ask but I thought I’d give it a shot.

About 8 years ago (October 2018), my best friend passed away. Nobody’s ever been able to tell me how, when, or where, if he’s been cremated or buried. I’m 99.9% sure he passed in California, he’s not originally from this country but I don’t see why he wouldn’t be buried in the U.S.

How possible would it be to be able to find him? I really only have that information and his first and last name

EDIT: Thank you for your kind and helpful comments. U reallu appreciate it 🤗

Hi, I'm wondering if anyone could point me in a direction of what on earth we could say after the service as a final committal at the graveside for my dad's service. My dad is only 66. His death was unexpected, tragic after a long time of trauma and grief and subsequent alcohol addiction. My poor poor dad. He was a staunch atheist, problem solver, scientist brain, ND, music was his life (house, hip hop, soul mostly) he wasn't your average 66 year old for sure! I have no idea what could be said. And to add, I'm terrified of this final moment. We will have a celebrant with us

I’m a 27 (almost 28) year old artist from Latinoamérica. I’ve always loved art but now I have a boring desk job that has made me numb, I can’t even draw because I don’t have motivation.

I didn’t study to be in the funerary industry because, (it may sound bad but it’s what I felt/feel) I felt too stupid to do it. I’ve had ADHD and depression and can’t retain information easily, have strong emotions and difficulty remembering names and even things I like.

I constantly read books about the industry and stories of people participating in it. I don’t know if I’m romanticizing it, I never have seen a dead body in person, only behind my screen. But I really like the idea of giving people a caring and respectful funeral. I wish people didn’t see death as something so horrible, but myself have never lost someone human. Just my dog, and I suffered immensely as I saw him as my brother. But maybe I’ll feel different once I lose someone human?

I also think, isn’t it too late to get into it? I’m almost 28 and my only knowledge are facts of books and videos. I studied art… what studies should I need to be on it? How should I start? Am I being delusional about it? I feel childish and bad about my fascination with the dead, they are not funny, but I feel a spark when I read or talk about it.

EDIT: I want to make clear that i have a personal, horrible and dreadful urgency with having my life in order while I’m young. I know it’s ridiculous. I crave stability and I haven’t had it for much, and as an artist there’s always the strange pressure to be amazing, but young. It’s not as I feel like at 30 I’m a grandma, is just and anxiety of having everything in order as soon as possible. I’m just tired.

Hi, I'm from Brazil and I'm 16 years old. I've always been curious about thanatopraxy, but unfortunately, I haven't found a Brazilian community about it. My father worked as a necro-makeup artist in a funeral home for a long time.

I recently told my mother that when I'm 20, I want to take a course to become a thanatopraxy artist, and she's even supportive. My cat was cremated three weeks ago (I keep his ashes), and that also piqued my interest even more.

To begin with, what's essential to learn in this field? I've been researching a lot about the human body and everything related to it. I've never been scared by gore videos or images of dead people; I've always been serious about this. I don't want to be different in this post; I just want to truly learn about thanatopraxy.

(I know some people will say "you should be studying and not worrying about this", but bro, it’s just a personal life choice. You gotta respect it, and it’s good to start learning early 👍🏼)

This is in Florida

I purchased prearrangements 4 years ago. I was sold a graveside service that was supposed to be all inclusive. It was supposed to include embalming, dressing, viewing, etc. The sales representative just selected graveside service and didn't check all the boxes.

The funeral home/cemetery was purchased in early 2025.

I was charged a 400 refrigeration fee and around 300 for body prep. They were trying to charge me for embalming at 895. There was a 200 dollar storage fee that would also apply. This made us do the funeral faster than we wanted. We opted for Saturday. They charged us 600 for funeral director and 795 for cemetery Saturday service.

If they would have honored the emabalming, I would have had the funeral on Tuesday to avoid the Saturday fee. The director didn't think the body would last until Tuesday without embalming.

I spoke to the new owner. He pretty much just said a contract is a contract. If it isn't on the contract, they do not have an obligation to provide it. I was only provided the first page of four of the contract. I produced the email where the previous owner stated everything would be included, that didn't matter to the new owner. I adamantly asked for everything to be included in the contract except the tombstone.

The new owner said that Saturday service is additional no matter what. I mentioned that Saturday was selected in order to opt our of paying for the embalming. He also said that the refrigeration is mandatory and so is body prep. Basically, he just blamed the old owners.

I called the old manager (works at a new funeral home) and was told that refrigeration and body prep is covered under basic services.

If I would have had the funeral in 2024, I would have not had to pay the additional fees and would have been provided embalming. Since the new ownership came in, I got stuck with additional fees.

What are your thoughts? Should they refund some of the services since I have proof of what I was sold?

Hi, I was very excited about this opportunity at the beginning. I've never been a sales before, I applied for this Family Service Advisor (pre-planning sales) position simply because I truly believe in this product and I want to promote it, especially to some minority communities. I was so into it that I spent 4 hrs that day to drive to 4 different funeral homes and delivered my resumes in person.

After two rounds of interviews, I got the job offer. Now I am hesitated. Because I saw the employee benefits page online today.

The health insurance for a family of 4 is $650 per two weeks. For paid personal leave, it's 10 days a year. And only 24 hrs rollover time. For someone that has no sales experience, I assume I'll just make the base pay for the first 6 months, at least, which is $20/hr, that means after all the insurance fee, I only take home less than $300 per pay check. That's insane.

My direct manager is super friendly and nice, I hate to be an ass#@&* to him. I don't know what to do. I'll just let them run my background check first I guess....

I’ve worked in the industry, but I am planning on starting my own business and I’m unsure what the proper charges should be. I don’t want to sell my services, but I do want to be competitive. I haven’t found a good venue for finding out what to charge. Would 350 per body be fair within a 50 mile radius? With a 100 mile radius 450? Can anyone tell me what they charge for similar services just as a comparison?

I live in Indiana, low-middle class, and the two schools that I had my eye on are either too far away to rationalize for a ~2 year program or have questionable accreditation status (Ivy Tech's mortuary science program and Mid-America College of Funeral Service respectively). I haven't researched many out of state institutions as I'm worried about the cost, and I would like to hear a professional opinion before making any big moves. Any advice is appreciated. Thank you.

I'm more curious than anything else. I'm in Massachusetts, and had my dog cremated years ago.

I was curious as to if I could have her cremains put into the casket/coffin with me ?

Her cremains are in a plastic bag inside a closed tin.

Would love to be able to have her buried with me if this is even possible.

Has anything like this ever been done or even allowed ?

Arizona In 2018 my mom died in her bed. She was 68. Her husband slept in a different bedroom due to snoring. He discovered my mom. She was taken straight to the funeral home. No autopsy. I was recovering from a major surgery with a csf leak. Unable to travel. Her husband decided she would be cremated. I lived 1600 miles away. My brother lived 700 miles away. He drove 2 days and when he arrived they refused to let him see her unless he paid $200 viewing fee. I threatened to call the news outlets. Eventually they gave in and he saw her. She was frozen exactly how she was found. There was supposed to be a memorial service after I healed. When I spoke to her husband last, I asked for some ashes to put in a necklace. He refused. He also said he was planning to combine his ashes with her. She wouldn't want that! Isn't it illegal? Well he never got an urn, he has disappeared and there was never a service. My mom deserved better! I cry about this often. It doesn't feel like she is really dead because of everything that happened. Is there anything I can do to find out where she is? To obtain her remains after he passes? He has no children. The whole situation is unreal to me. I don't understand why they didn't do an autopsy. I learned after the fact that she had a bad UTI and had been throwing up.

Hello, aspiring mortician here, I was sure I knew how most of the preparations of a body for a casket burial would go, that is until my cousin in law died tragically and was buried. Ever since then I have had questions I can’t seem to be answered. He unfortunately died in a car crash, where the car ignited in flames, charing majority if not all of his body. I was told that when his father was allowed to view his body, he was completely unrecognizable. Now, I’m not exactly ignorant, I know when a body or person is burnt in a fire, the body’s response is to curl up, knees and arms usually raised. So I’m wondering.. if they were to be so stiff like that, how would they be positioned into a casket? He wasn’t cremated, he was buried, his funeral was of course closed casket. I just don’t understand how that was possible..

I just came across a TikTok posted by PIMS that their graduation speaker is going to be that Lauren the Mortician girl.

Any thoughts on this?

My alum friends and I are massively disappointed that they wouldn't look into her as a person or an online persona. She's got loads of drama on her name, a rumor of no licensure, being a TERF, amongst being someone who insanely exaggerates her experiences.

This is a bad look for them... How do you all feel?

TikTok

Edit: PIMS deleted all the comments that aren't in Lauren's favor. Yikes!

Edit 2: A few alumn and I have made this petition to be signed and sent to the school. If you're interested, consider signing and sharing :) Petition

I got a verbal offer from my interview Thursday morning(yay). I filled out WOTC form later that evening and haven’t heard anything back about background and drug testing. My status in the portal says offer, I’m just curious how long it typically takes to get the ball rolling. Plus it was a holiday weekend so I’m not sure if I should wait a couple more business days or reach out to the hiring lady on my application?

I’m 17 M and I my uncle is dying. I’ve been to one funeral before for a distant family member, and it had no casket. For this one how ever, it most likely is going to be open casket. I have never seen a lifeless body before, especially when it comes to a family member I know, and I just can’t see the dead body of a family member. How can I manage this?

So I just started a mortuary science program two weeks ago, and my Thanato Microbiology/Pathology course is already giving me that “uh oh” feeling. I got B’s in accelerated A&P I and II, but that fried the crap out of my brain and I still feel like I’m burnt out from those even 5 months later. I’m sitting here trying to read my chapters and all I can think is, “I am never going to pull this off.”

Is the whole program like this? Is it going to absolutely kick the crap out of me? I consider myself to be fairly intelligent with a killer work ethic and pretty good study habits, but I am freaking the heck out right now.

Is the NBE very difficult? How many times can you retake it if you fail? Did anybody else feel like this during their courses? This is what I want to be doing, but I feel so intimidated right now, and this is only the beginning of the program!! My classes don’t have any study guides, so I feel like I’m deep diving into every single term I’ve never seen before and spending hours on things that I might not even be tested on, just because I really want to know the material, but I also don’t want to back myself into a corner spending too much time on every detail…how did you guys do it?? How do I do this??