r/blackmagicfuckery • u/imJackWilson • 1d ago

His Eyes

22.9k Upvotes

89% Upvoted

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3.4k

u/Vcheck1 1d ago

Okay, what cocktail of drugs do I need to achieve this ability

92

u/A_Feltz 1d ago

An eighth of Talent, two baggies of Perseverance, and about two keys of Time

90

u/n3ur0mncr 1d ago

Two bags of grass, seventy-five pellets of mescaline, five sheets of high powered blotter acid, a salt shaker half full of cocaine, and a whole galaxy of multi-colored uppers, downers, screamers, laughers... and also a quart of tequila, a quart of rum, a case of Budweiser, a pint of raw ether and two dozen amyls.

Oh - and some paint and a lesser key of solomon.

53

u/Baloooooooo 1d ago

There is nothing more helpless and depraved than a man in the depths of an ether binge

11

u/Johnnys_an_American 1d ago

You can turn your back on a person, but never turn your back on a drug, especially when its waving a razor sharp hunting knife in your eye.

19

u/archimidesx 1d ago

He’ll see the bats soon enough

12

u/saucerfulofsucrettes 1d ago

Just admiring the shape of your skull 😌

13

u/rkbizzle69 1d ago

Tell me about the f****ing golf shoes!

4

u/Old_Cameraguy_8311 19h ago

We can't stop here! This is bat country!

5

u/Dapper_Twist_4995 1d ago

And I knew we'd get into that rotten stuff pretty soon...

3

u/jc10189 11h ago

It's impossible to walk in this muck!

11

u/HarvardCistern208 1d ago

One thing that never made sense was the salt shaker half full of cocaine. You have so many drugs, but so little of this one drug. Why?!

5

u/wearereapingdoom 1d ago

You’re asking why in this economy?

6

u/Loosiepla 1d ago

In defense of the shaker...that's actually a lot of blow. I little dab’ll do ya.

2

u/Mahiel 1d ago

I assumed they started with more but that was all they had left at the time of him writing inventory.

2

u/n3ur0mncr 1d ago

While he probably did a little before the trip, thompson acquired all of it over a couple days right before they left using the cash advances he got for writing the two articles.

The man was beyond batshit crazy.

1

u/w3bar3b3ars 1d ago

Because cocaine fucking sucks in almost all measurable ways...

There's times that may require a certified bell ringer, and that it is.

1

u/HarvardCistern208 2h ago

Interesting take, but hold on a sec. Go try Arcoline and then get back to me. Then again, maybe you haven't had the real thing...

1

u/Youngsinatra345 21h ago

Because he was a fucking narcotics agent

2

u/A_Feltz 1d ago

The ether is fun at parties but non smoking only

2

u/Scared-Cut-4571 1d ago

Did you see what GOD just did to us, man!?!?!

1

u/Efficient-Maximum651 1d ago

55 joints, 55 blunts, 55 bowls, 100 GUMMIES...

1

u/jgab145 1d ago

Where can I get each of these things and how much will it cost me?

1

u/hpr928 1d ago

Damn, we humans have some really creative ways of altering our state of mind.

1

u/ArcticSeaSalt 1d ago

Don't forget to take off your shoes and put in hoop earrings mandatory requirement.

1

u/Sugar_Kowalczyk 1d ago

Will half a Greater Seal work? I don't want to buy a fresh one and waste it if I don't have to. 

1

u/Loosiepla 1d ago

I never thought of a salt shaker.....might have saved a year of my life, collectively.

1

u/Dinker54 22h ago

Good setup for a trip to bat country.

1

u/LowPreparation421 22h ago

Not that we needed all that for the trip, but once you get locked in to a serious drug collection. The tendency is to push it as far as you can.

0

u/Doschupacabras 1d ago

I sang this as a Christmas tune.