r/boniver 2d ago

Spoke to Justin at Song Exploder!

i was selected to ask a question last night, and it was such a dream. i’ve imagined so many times over the years what i would say to justin if i could; the one thing that always started the conversation was “thank you”. thank you for this world; this expansive universe that holds so much of my lived experience. for the art that has challenged me, held me in some of my darkest moments, time capsules to relive so many different timelines. it’s why i always go back to bon iver; it is a living, breathing body of work that feels like a gentle caress from an old friend, the past versions of myself. a homecoming.

so last night i thanked justin, and he said thank you back. i’m usually good with public speaking, but suddenly speaking to my favorite artist, i was so nervous. i did my best to tell briefly him everything i’d thought about saying for over a decade. but also to set context for my question; if this is my relationship to the art as a listener, what is that relationship like for you as the creator, the messenger of this work?

honestly, i blacked out a bit because i couldn’t believe what was happening. the host co-opted my question a little, but justin spoke directly to me in his answer. from what i remember, his first response was “i’m sitting right there next to you”. which pulled at my heart, because genuinely the music has always felt like that. like justin himself is right there with you in it all. he went on about how when he’s making the music he’s in it and in that moment, but after, he’s on the outside of it with us. if anyone else remembers more of that answer, please share. or if you have a recording of that part of the Q&A i would absolutely love to have it! i wish i audio recorded his answer, but i was so overwhelmed with everything happening. bad day to forget my adhd meds lol.

anyway, it truly still (and probably always will) feels surreal that i spoke with justin after all these years of imagining what i might say, but never thinking i’d actually have the opportunity. his eye contact and really tuning in with me was such a gift. two people after the show said i really touched him/made him think, so to have that moment of humanness with someone i hold so much respect and appreciation for is an unbelievable gift. 18 y/o me getting her first tattoo of the “bon iver” script from the self-titled album is beyond thrilled. the best night ❤️

133 Upvotes

35 comments sorted by

56

u/AaronBleyaert 2d ago

You had a great question! I also liked how, after he finished answering your question, Justin quietly said "Thanks for saying all that." He seemed really touched.

24

u/starfinder22 2d ago edited 2d ago

Thank you sm for reminding me of that!! That’s partly why I posted, I was feeling so many things that some of the interaction has slipped my memory and I’m hoping others can fill in the gaps haha.

It’s really incredible to think I might’ve touched him for a moment, like how he’s touched me for all this time 🥺

16

u/SteveNovoa 2d ago

I’m so happy for you. Can’t wait to listen when it’s out.

14

u/starfinder22 2d ago

thank you 🥺 i really hope it gets released and they leave the q&a bits in

1

u/Brief_Air3732 2d ago

Have they confirmed they’ll release it as a podcast ep?

4

u/Due_Grapefruit5250 2d ago

I’d be shocked if it wasn’t — Hrishi always released the live events he did for the West Wing Weekly podcast that he hosted as a regular episode eventually. I don’t think he’s done a live taping of song exploder before, so I could be wrong, but I’d assume it’s going to be released at some point

3

u/captain_wetbeard 2d ago

There are live episodes of it which have been released in the past they are so well produced that you'd not notice that they were. He'll normally mention at the start about how the conversation was recorded live at whichever auditorium

19

u/yamm3rs 2d ago

I could tell a few people around me, including myself, were choked up by your story, question, and his response. Thanks for being brave enough to put yourself out there. It was a really cool moment of the show.

6

u/starfinder22 2d ago

ty for your kind words 🥺

10

u/j4321g4321 2d ago

Amazing! So happy you got to have that experience. Every story I’ve heard of Justin is so wholesome.

8

u/starfinder22 2d ago

I deeply appreciated how connected that moment felt. I’m not big on celebrity because at the end of the day we’re all humans living this human experience, and i think that’s something he clearly operates from/resonates with as well

10

u/deeplevitation 2d ago

It was a great question and your gratitude was deeply felt and expressed. I loved it.

I thought his answer was perfect to. He’s one of us, he loves the music and gets to experience it to. Once it’s out in the world it’s no longer his, he becomes a fan just like us.

Thanks for being so beautiful and saying what we all wanted to say. I had my hand raised to ask a question and after you I felt no need to anymore.

3

u/starfinder22 2d ago

ahh, such a good summary of his answer. and my heart!! ty for being so kind. i’m honored my words resonated like that 🫶🏽

8

u/OscarMike44 Beth/Rest 2d ago

“I’m sitting right there next to you” 😭😭😭😭😭😭

1

u/starfinder22 2d ago

no bc my heart?? i paraphrased it might’ve been a word or two different but that was the core sentiment. i had never thought of it that way but it resonated so much

0

u/_skyskysky 2d ago

Wow. And your post is worded so beautifully, it pulls at my heart. Thank you, love.

5

u/AprilBase 2d ago

Kudos for making your dream come true - I can imagine anyone getting terribly nervous in that situation! Seems like you did really good ❤️

5

u/friedchiken21 715 - CR∑∑KS 2d ago

Wonderfully eloquent question and well deserved applause. I will say I was a bit upset that the host hijacked your question. I'm glad you are happy with Justin's response but I felt it was a little short.

2

u/starfinder22 2d ago

ty!! tbh after 90 minutes of talk show i’d probably be short too haha

5

u/millenialshortbread 2d ago

I also loved how Justin suggested you as the next audience question! He said “there’s this lovely lady at the front” or something. It was great.

3

u/starfinder22 2d ago

it’s funny bc i was under the impression the intention was for him to choose the questions?? i remember he picked me then a different guy was started talking lmaoo. it was very kind was intentional about getting back to me

2

u/Allmygoodnesstoshow 1d ago

I’m sitting right there next to you 😭😭😭

3

u/hjmartinez 2d ago

Your question and your initial sentiment was so eloquently said, loved your question!! Was a little peeved the host took over to ask a question but it got back to yours 😅

4

u/starfinder22 2d ago

i was too, bc let me have my 2 minutes smh! but i really appreciate how justin came back and centered it to me :)

2

u/Delicious_Device_87 2d ago

Wonderful question, and response!

I always think it must be so surreal as an artist, especially one's like Justin who dive so deep into their own emotional openings, to see or hear how people you've never met one-on-one react, and this is quite beautiful.

2

u/starfinder22 2d ago

it is a bit of touching souls isn’t it? i try to remind myself in dark moments that pretty much every human emotion is not unique to me, that i share this pain with others and for that i am not unique. he joked about how bon music before sable, fable is very “sad bastard.” love bc i am also a sad bastard lol. at one point he also expressed how the song/creating music with these other talented individuals makes him better as in a better person, and that resonated deeply because it’s what bon iver has done for me. i am better for having this vehicle that carries me through so much of living and reminds me that the burden, the joy, the chaos, is also being deeply felt by others

0

u/Delicious_Device_87 2d ago

I think how you, as an individual, can feel can be unique in your experience but that's okay amongst the wealth and rivers of all the emotions, yet I also completely understand what you're saying - I'm outwardly optimistic bc sometimes I feel so lost that I don't want others to feel the same, if that makes any sense.

Bon Iver, man, what a tremendous part of the artistry we've all been lucky enough to discover along the way

NB: Your first line there threw me straight into a Joni and A Case of You, what a song!

1

u/roland1013 1h ago

I’m so glad you had that experience and thank you for sharing it. I wish I could say thanks personally and give justin a big hug

-25

u/OccasionallyCurrent 2d ago

Man, this I why I can’t hang in these fan subreddits.

This is borderline mental illness, and you all are cheering it on.

All of you should get outside. This is terrifying.

8

u/PurpleLunarMoths Beth/Rest 2d ago

I bet you're fun at parties... Way to try to ruins someone's touching moment.

4

u/Baskets_GM 1d ago

Oh please, drama queen

3

u/rapier999 2d ago

Dude, there’s nothing remotely unhealthy about this post. OP had a little bit of anxiety speaking to an artist they admire about art that has been profound and influential in their life, and it all went down at a Q&A that was explicitly inviting questions. I agree that parasocial relationships and obsessive behavior are unhealthy but I’m not convinced that you actually know what that looks like.

3

u/Delicious_Device_87 2d ago

Exactly this. I've read a lot of worrying things on reddit but this post was not one of them!

-1

u/dkinmn 2d ago

I'll gather downvotes in solidarity with you. This makes me extremely uncomfortable.