r/cancer • u/SnooBeans3982 • Jul 14 '25
Death Looking to take a little solo road trip before it's all over. Any suggestions?
29m. I'm currently in hospice care dying of lung cancer. The doctors told me in May that I likely had 1-4 months left. I Just got my backpay from my disability claim ( like 7k) and I'd like to go travel somewhere. I grew up in Philly and haven't really done much of that in my life. My pain & symptoms are mostly under control with my current meds and I am mobile. I also have a reliable vehicle that can take me wherever. I spent my whole life in a big city so I'd like to go somewhere more...naturey.. I guess? I'm thinking about going solo as well. Just wanna be with myself. Any suggestions on the east coast? Anything up to 10-12 hours away is fine with me. Just want to do/see something before I go out as I likely only have a few weeks to a few months at best left.
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u/TampaBob57 Esophagus IIIc, NSLC II Jul 14 '25
Maybe a trip thru the Blue Ridge and Smokey Mountains? Only a few hours south and west of Philly and a drive along the Skyline Drive is gorgeous anytime of year. There is some waterfalls within easy walking distance off the drive. If you could make it down to NC via the Blue Ridge Parkway and on to Asheville for some nice little restaurants and downtown area. Once in Asheville there's all sorts of natural sites to see and experience, day trips from Asheville to Sliding Rock or go to the top of Mt Mitchell (highest peak east of the Mississippi) . But getting down to Aville will be a bit outside of your 12 hour range, but not by much.
If you plan your trip you can do side trips to check out caves like Luray Caverns or vineyards, civil war sites (both large and small) or even cast a line in some trout waters (stocked or native).
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u/TampaBob57 Esophagus IIIc, NSLC II Jul 14 '25
And btw, I was in Asheville in April and they've pretty much recovered from Helene). Recommend a place called 12 Bones (in Arden NC) for some pretty good ribs and sides (don't miss out on the corn pudding). I drove from Tampa to Philly the long way and stopped for 2 nights in Aville with 12 Bones being a primary reason,
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u/SnooBeans3982 Jul 14 '25
Yeah I might just plan a route & stop in different little places. I really just want a change of scenery
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u/ChichiriPikachu Jul 15 '25
I second Tampa's suggestion of Blue Ridge and Smokey mountains. Peaks of Otter, I forgot the exact name of the Caverns there... But yeah. Virginia, the Carolinas, Tennessee (near Dollywood is good).
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u/happy123z Jul 28 '25
Blue Ridge Parkway definitely. So beautiful and many Lookout points to stop at. Asheville is a lovely little town. Maybe you can raft down the river toothed its very peaceful and beautiful. Sending love bro
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u/Basic-Outcome-7001 Jul 14 '25
Niagara Falls. The US side is naturey, and you can walk across the bridge to the Canada side and that place is really fun! You could also drive across.
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u/BuffaloPotholeBandit Jul 28 '25
I live near Niagara and while the falls are cool I wouldnāt call them Naturey. Definitely work a pass through to somewhere else
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u/No-Camera-720 Jul 14 '25
I feel you. I have done one 3rd world road trip. And it was sublime for the scenery and people. I will eventually run out of options and I wouldn't mind seeing the place again, while I'm still able.
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u/Cat_Mom_Indefinitely Jul 15 '25
If you can make it on a plane, Northern California is beautiful and scenic. Itās not too hot and could be comfortable.
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u/SnooBeans3982 Jul 16 '25
Yeah I can do planes, was just thinking it would be more convenient to have my car. Iād have to go get that dumb āreal idā thing first tho
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u/Cat_Mom_Indefinitely Jul 16 '25
You can use your passport. Not forcing at all. Only suggesting because itās less hot/humid/muggy on west coast. (I lived in Philly for 10 years so I speak feelingly). The Pacific Northwest - San Juan islands and the beautiful Pacific Ocean- is another bucket list.
East coast beaches are much more swimmable than west coasted.
If staying in east coast, Maine and New Hampshire are beautiful.
Iāve always wanted to go to Sanibel island and Anna Maria Island in Florida where you can swim in their beautiful warm beaches. Given high retirement population in FL, there would be healthcare for your cancer if you need it.
(Also, if you are mobile now, I think you have more than 1-4 months. Cancer progresses fast but not that fast).
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u/SnooBeans3982 Jul 16 '25
Yeah I feel as though I have a LITTLE more time than that. I mean, I'm not God, and only he knows, but if I had to guess based on progression/how I feel, I'll probably make it to right around new years maybe. My cancer is everywhere tho (Lungs, Pleura, Liver, Bones, 3 different lymph nodes) so things could change quick. Before all the meds, It felt like any day so maybe my symptoms are just really well managed. I was in UNBEARABLE pain that I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy before I was officially diagnosed. So much so, that I thought I might not even make it to the biopsy. Right now, I'm on 30mg oxy IR every 3hrs, 100mg of morphine every 6hrs, kolonopin 2x a day, Steroids, and a water pill (which is a pain in the ass because it makes me pee every 15 min)
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u/Cat_Mom_Indefinitely Jul 16 '25
Some things to help decide:
Can you eat? Or are there restrictions?
Will you need medical care or emergency medical care at any point? May want to stay near towns or cities?
Do the meds let you drive long distances or would it be safer to fly/train/bus?
Any family or friends who could travel with you or let you stop in with them? (Iām thinking of all your pills and if it helps to have a caregiver)
Do you have the funds for a comfortable hotel?
Are there any physical restrictions? Can you hike, climb up hills? Or would a beautiful beach be better for your energy?
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u/DismalDistribution61 Jul 16 '25
Iām British so I canāt contribute but wishing you the most wonderful and peaceful trip ā¤ļø
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u/CelebrationConnect31 M30, Melanoma stage 3b, not very hopeful Jul 14 '25
I would suggest Italy. It's a good scenery to die but it's not 10-12 hours away.
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u/Expert_Respond1076 Jul 14 '25
Agree with others re:coastal Maine. Also Adirondacks and Catskills, maybe up to Lake Saranac and Lake Placid. Summer up there can be so beautiful.
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u/funkygrrl Myeloproliferative neoplasm (PV) Jul 14 '25
The Berkshires in Western Mass. Beautiful mountains but also world class theater and dance in the summer.
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u/Similar_Track_4488 Jul 15 '25
Maine is beautiful from Portland to Bar Harbor. Also, a ride to Niagara falls . Don't let the doctor's estimate of your life span guide you...choose life each day and pray to Jesus as Heaven is a good place to live eternally.
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u/Mister_Big_Stuff Jul 15 '25
Washington, DC has lots of great museums, if you enjoy visiting them. There's several very beautiful spots in the region as well, like Haines Point.
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u/Ok_Act7808 Jul 16 '25
We love living in Havelock NC. Trails her like Neusiok. Also just 25 miles to beach - 2 of them. Our river is huge Neuse River. We are 18 miles to the town of Beaufort which has been in a magazine. History of Blackbeard. Itās relaxing and on the water & they have small tour boats to the little island where wild horses are. Larger ride the Cape Lookout. Atlantic beach has Fort Macon- pretty cool and beachfront as well. Iām sorry youāre facing such. I have been stage 4 rare liver cancer incurable but this year got into a clinical trial. What type of lung cancer do you have? Chemo worked well for me for 11 sessions but my cancer learns to work around it after a bit & now Mets to spine and pelvis. My timeline was 10-12 months which is almost done but with me doing the clinical trial I hope to get some good news from the August scan. There has been some meds that work great for stage 4 lung cancer. I know someone who is almost done with chemo and radiation & doing better. Not to mention immunotherapy drugs available. My cancer was treated with chemo same as lung even though mine is large cell it was still effective.
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u/SnooBeans3982 Jul 16 '25 edited Jul 16 '25
If Iām being honest, Iāve fought enough battles in my life. Iām just not up for it. My cancer is incurable and also VERY rare for my age, Stage IVB adenocarcinoma metastasized to both lungs, my Liver, lymph nodes, bones(t2 vertebrae, ribcage, femur) , & Pleura. They offered treatments, but all they would do is delay the inevitable and thatās IF my body responded to them (which was about a %40 chance). I declined the treatments and went into hospice. I donāt want to spend my last days like that. But everyone is different. Luckily I donāt have any kids or wife or anyone that relies on me so maybe itās a little easier for me than someone who does and wants to be around for them.
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u/Cat_Mom_Indefinitely Jul 16 '25
Sorry for writing again, but your post really touched me. Something you could consider is a cruise. Our family loves cruises and itās a great way to see a few places you would normally not get to. I would not recommend a party cruise going to Bahamas but there are likely cruises going up the Canadian coast. Two years ago, we took an Alaska cruise and the scenery is beautiful. Cruises often leave from beautiful ports so you could spend a few days there.
Why recommend- lots of time to relax and look at the oceans. Likely a beach destination along the way. No worry about food. Doctors on board for minor issues.
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u/Ok_Act7808 Jul 17 '25
I was diagnosed with stage4 neuroendocrine liver carcinoma July 2024 incurable as well. I opted for chemo the next am, they werenāt sure Iād survive it. 10 rounds later- March 2025. I found a clinical trial did another round of chemo due to Mets of spine and pelvis to hold me till trial began. I have been in trial since June and will know later August how itās working. I just wasnāt ready to give up. Iām 56 year old female with adult kids husband etc. but I had just been through breast cancer mastectomy & some lymph nodes removed with chemo and rads. Here I am 4 years later doing it again. Itās all a personal choice but I am very hard headed. I respect your choice but if you change your mind - giving it a try is worth it. ā¤ļøāš©¹
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u/SnooBeans3982 Jul 17 '25 edited Jul 17 '25
Everyoneās different. Iāve fought enough battles in my life, I donāt have it in me. Iād rather just go as peacefully as possible. If I could be cured, I would, but thatās not possible. Itās in my lungs, lymph nodes , liver, bones, pleura and who knows where else itās spread since Iāve been on hospice
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u/Clean-Course-3242 Jul 19 '25
Drive up to the Poconos, the PA Wildlands & Elk County, visit the beaches in Erie.
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u/dirkwoods Jul 20 '25
How far are you willing to travel and be away from your home base?
I live a few hours from Tahoe, Sonoma/Napa wine country, Yosemite, Santa Cruz, Monterey, a few redwood forests, Point Reyes seashore, Mendocino/Sea Ranch, the ocean, and a handful of other less famous natural sites. My son-in-law recently took his French mother on this tour with his uncle who has cancer and they loved it.
It would of course mean flying in and out of San Francisco, Oakland, or San Jose. I would also figure out where the nearest healthcare is for each of these places just in case. Happy to provide more info if it sounds appealing.
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u/dirkwoods Jul 20 '25
Sorry. Please disregard. 10-12 hours and east coast in your own car puts CA out. Flying less than 10 hours and renting a car would of course make it doable.
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u/myrightnut11 Jul 27 '25
Maybe this'll get buried, but how much time do you think you have where you can travel? I've been to many of the places mentioned here, but if a plane isn't an issue my favorite place on earth is southern Chile. Planning on moving back down there. If you want to go there I'd happily share my favorite spots, many of them not well known. If you fly there and road trip north to south, the variable scenery of the country is insane.
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u/charmingbadger357 Jul 27 '25
Hi friend, idk where you're located but if you're on the East Coast, I would highly recommend Shenandoah National Park. There are lots of beautiful trails and views along Skyline Drive (lots of places to stop your car and park for scenery, no need to walk a lot) and there are some manageable trails that aren't too long or intense that can get you some beautiful views as well (Stony Man trail is amazing and relatively short). They also have Skyland cabins you can stay in (within the park) and I haven't stayed there but it seems really nice. I wish you every peace and happiness.
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u/Piano-bandit Jul 27 '25 edited Jul 27 '25
If you make it to the coastline of Massachusetts lmk we can get up and go checkout w.e. if need a friend to hang out with for a few hours or w.e. restaurant, bar, fishing, walking the canal or downtown new bedford or Portuguese food in Fall River. Go to a church or Quaker meeting. You coild also do a whale watch, deep sea fish, sky dive, get party in Ptown, see the dunes of the cape, rent a scooter and see the mansion on the island, Also, this is a state that weed is legal. Lots of stuff if any interest you
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u/Solid_While1259 Jul 28 '25
How about traveling down to Long island, The Hamptons beautiful beaches & restaurants , Mystic seaport CT or cap cod. If thats not your scene theres plenty of beautiful falls & caves in the catskills. Sorry youāre going through this. I wish you peace & happiness in the interim
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u/brttvnyy Jul 28 '25
I just want to extend my condolences. Iām so sorry that you are dealing with this and I wish you peace in whichever form is best for you. Iāll pray for you šš¾
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u/Straight-Macaron2023 Jul 28 '25
Much love buddy. You were dealt a rougher hand than most. Death is not the end. Make sure everyone you have ever loved, knows how much you love them. You can let it all out to them now. Enjoy your time left with us idiots and i hope you feel better up there or for whatever is next <3
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u/Logical-Ease-3142 Jul 28 '25
Howdy internet stranger, sorry to hear of your diagnosis. Glad you are considering exploring with your time left.
If I had limited time I would drive to Banff, Alberta Canada. Heck, I would drive you there if you needed a pal.
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u/SpaceCaptainJeeves Jul 28 '25
As others have said, the Blue Ridge Parkway is a gorgeous drive. And this is going to sound a little morbid, but I peeked at your profile and I don't think you'd mind the sentiment...
I usually advise against young people taking up motorcycling, but in your case, we're talking weeks of it instead of months, so it's less dangerous.
My old professor adored riding through the mountainous Parkway on a motorbike, feeling very close to nature. The views are spectacular, and since you're a man of faith, I think you'd find a lot of Allah/God/love there.
I wish you peace and joy during your remaining weeks. ā¤ļø
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u/womp-the-womper Jul 28 '25
How long of a trip do you want to do? I think the best route I can think of would be going from canada, go to Banff, then down to glacier national park- make sure to do going to the sun road. Then youāll go down through Montana. Iād recommend going to the north entrance of yellowstone by red lodge. Youāll go down the west side to see all the hot springs and geyserās and go to Hayden to see the bears and wolves. Down through the Tetons and to Colorado. Youāll definitely want to do trail ridge road and then go over to independence pass. Then you can go through aspen (beautiful in the fall with the leave change) and over to glenwood springs. Go to iron mountain hot springs and the amusement part- make sure to do the cave tours.
You could cut it up if you wanted a smaller trip.
Lots of love, I hope you have a wonderful journey!
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u/Nervous_Bird_1698 Jul 28 '25
Hello I am a 50 yr old who has been living with Stage 4 colon cancer for 3 years. I was diagnosed with this exactly a year to the day that the love of my life died in my arms....of CANCER. If you need to talk, visit, scream, or celebrate anything and/or everything I am here. I think I maybe have something that may help you find clarity and peace.
C
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u/sonkcaja Jul 28 '25
I'm from California. I lived on my East Coast for 10 years, Maryland and Florida for some time. I experienced loss and I searched for healing with adventure, nature, running and Afternoon Tea. I loved the smokies and exploring Pigeon Forge area. I searched for Big Foot in Alabama which there's a few state parks surprisingly peaceful vibe. Florida has the most beautiful and warm waters you'll ever experience. If you want to see an underground grotto, Devil's Den is a sight to experience. If you like jazz and street music, Louisiana NOLA is a must.
What are you hoping to see, feel and experience? Do you prefer hot or cold weather? Do you want excitement or relaxation?
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u/Organic_Half_9818 Jul 28 '25
Reading that youāre going to almost maybe even die made my throat drop. I know that this isnāt even related, but I wish we could have a solution to cancer. Sad to think that in four months, this Reddit account could be completely unused.
On the serious side I recommend you hang out with all of your friends and family before you pass. Go see the world, travel everywhere youāve wanted to go. Do everything that youāve never got the chance to do, but I donāt have time to wait for. If you wanna do something do it this type of situation to me really just isnāt a what should I do? Itās a when should I do it?
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u/The_Elite_Guy_ Jul 28 '25
OP , Iām sorry to ask but what was the cause of this lung cancer ? Did u ever smoke cigarettes , weed , vape ?
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u/BubbleHeadMonster Jul 28 '25
Any National parks, preferably ones with hot springs !! We have so many of them here in the US, Yosemite is where I want my ashes spread. š«¶ā®ļø
I also encourage you to enjoy thc or psychedelics lol, you canāt bring any weed into national parks, but you can eat some before you go into them!
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u/IamRocko Jul 28 '25
Come to Wisconsin. Its Americas well kept secret. Door county is an absolute vibe. But there's beauty everywhere here. Totally slept on. š
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u/Littleshuswap Jul 14 '25
Maine is beautiful. Drive up the coast to New Brunswick! You'll get delicious lobster and won't be disappointed! Sending you a hug.š©·