i gave up

[u/Julesx23]

This is a long and deeply personal text. I feel the need to vent here, among strangers, because I simply don't have the courage to share what I'm going through with anyone close to me.

Summarizing my story: I have faced aggressive breast cancer. This is the third time it has returned and, this time, it has spread to other places and is much more aggressive than usual. I'm exhausted. I can't take any more treatments, with fading hopes, with the physical and emotional wear and tear, with the days full of uncertainty. I am fully aware that this is consuming me little by little, and, honestly, during all these years of illness, I have not felt that I was really living either. This is not life… not in any sense.

Is there anyone else here who has decided to stop fighting their illness, who has chosen to suspend treatments? I would like to read to you. My decision has several reasons: everything I already shared, but also the economic situation. In the country where I live, the most effective treatments are only obtained privately. I have spent everything I had: I sold my house, my car, everything of value, all my savings, just to have the hope of accessing an opportunity that, however, was denied to me time and time again. Now, when this illness returns, I have no strength or resources left, even if I wanted them with all my being.

I know I'm still young, but I no longer feel like I have anything to lose... or gain. I live this process in solitude; My family doesn't know, I haven't wanted to share it because I don't feel like they're interested in hearing it either. I feel alone, once again: the world against me.

I would like to read them to those who have made this decision, what motivated them, and what advice they can give me. Thank you for taking the time to read me.

[u/Evely_Ardor]

There are non-profit hospitals and maybe a doctor that specializes more in what you are experiencing! I’d suggest making a blog and each out more to others who have gone through similar