r/cancer • u/TheEvilSatanist • 18d ago
Patient Just got diagnosed
This weekend was absolute chaos and clusterfuck. I went to the ER on Saturday for what I thought was a persistent stomach bug.
After a CAT scan of my stomach and a battery of tests this weekend, I was diagnosed with stage 4 metastatic cancer.
They did a biopsy Sunday, to see if they can determine where the cancer is coming from.
I also have another CAT scan coming up to see if it has expanded into my chest and lungs.
I really have no idea what I'm looking for, I'm still trying to process all this.
Also, I am a Satanist for a reason, so please save all the "just give it to God" or etc bc it's not something I personally believe in.
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u/Awesome_Possum22 18d ago
I’m so sorry. It’s a mindf*ck in the worst way in the beginning. I have stage four colon cancer with Mets to my lungs and lymph nodes. It’s not good, and really aggressive. The first month was the worst; the uncertainty, the shock, the anger, the sadness. I wish I could say I processed it in a healthy way, but that first week I just got drunk (which if you enjoy, do it now, because it’s a no no with treatments!). While it’s still no walk in the park and I still need to keep my Lorazepam close at hand for when the panic attacks hit about things, the days do fall into a new normal once you start treatments. I’m a little over a year into treatments and while I know I’ll never be cured, at least I’ve been gifted a little more time. Not all stage four with Mets is a death sentence, there are lots of survivors in this group that beat stage four with Mets and are in remission now! All situations are different, so keep some hope close. My best advice is to try to keep your mind occupied so it doesn’t spiral into the darkest places where it’s really hard to come back from. If you work, I’d keep the news to yourself until you have a solid treatment plan in hand. Go out with friends or family and do fun things. Treat yourself to guilty pleasures. When not at the 100 scans and appointments that will be booked for you, visit your fave restaurants or cook banging meals. If you start treatment your appetite won’t always be the greatest. I sometimes fantasize about being able to stomach my fave foods again (I still can sometimes, you have to learn to jump and take advantage when you have real feel good days! Don’t waste them online or in front of the tv! They’ll be plenty of time for that on the days your body really needs rest). Anyways- that’s what my experience has been, and what worked and didn’t for me, for what it’s worth. It may be different for you. Know you’re not alone. There are a bunch of us on here that have been right where you are now and understand how badly it truly sucks. There is lots of great advice and support on here, so don’t be afraid to reach out. I’m not religious either, but I do believe in manifesting good things and the real good vibes (or evil ones!) you can feel and absorb from other people (or even nature!), so I’m keeping you in my thoughts and sending you positivity for your journey, you can accept or not, it’s okay either way! Hoping for some positive news for you as you complete your scans and preliminary doctors visits.