I’m stage 4 (with shitty odds of beating leomyosarcoma) and I think I may just want to sell my house and travel before the end instead of some shitty existence with chemo for maybe 2-3 yrs). My oncologist wants to help me fight but I just found out my husband is texting other women… I’m not sure I really want to stick around for much more of this. I’d prefer to see France, Greece, Africa… then head over that rainbow bridge. Take my husband off the life insurance and leave it all to my kid instead, sell the house and use the funds to live it up… not sure where I’ll die… some hospice somewhere I guess. But I don’t want to die pretending this guy loves me or sitting around in shitty Phoenix, AZ when I could be on some heavenly beach (just me and God). Am I overreacting or do you get me?

I was diagnosed with lung cancer and a bunch of other problems earlier this year. I have progressed to using oxygen 24/7. While my oxygen with the supplemental stays over 90 I still feel like I'm suffocating. I can't even lay down fully and have to sleep sitting partially up because of this. Has anyone else dealt with this and what did you do to make it better?

Test after test after test. I’m exhausted and decided I need my end of life crisis. I really want someone to spend the rest of this journey with, but at this point I’ll settle for a bike to ride into the sunset. Has anyone else done this? I mean.. it’ll never happen because.. bills and getting 4k is impossible. But has anyone just said .. screw it let’s have fun on the way out.

I want to relive my youth of riding the backroads. I want to see the sights of America, or just ride around town.

It’s a nice thing to think about while I schedule the next appointment.

Finally found where my cancer started basically what multiple doctors told me for years was a hemiroid for YEARS…was actually where my SCC started to make matters worse i am atleast stage 3 atm as far as i k ow since it has spred to my lymph nodes (which was at first thought to be Sarcoma but when the biopsy came back i found out it was SCC. Still waiting on my PETscan been the longest one and a half week of my life tbh getting that scan will tell me if im stage 3 or stage 4 and i am sooo scared.

I feel depressed cant sleep and just i want to know if anyone else that has or has had this type before. I have family here with me and amazing support system but i feel so alone in this atm. Got told if it has already gotten to stage 4 my situation will look pretty grim :/

I must admit I don't know exactly what I'm expecting to gain from this, but I don't really know anyone who I'm able to speak to. And I apologise in advance if my questions are not appropriate for this sub. If they aren't, mods please remove it.

My now 10 year old son was diagnosed with medulloblastoma when he was 20 months old. He went through surgery, followed by 6 months of chemotherapy, followed by 6 weeks of radiation. The entire experience destroyed me. I felt like I couldn't breathe for the entire time he was undergoing treatment. Fortunately for us (and here I do apologise, as I know we were lucky, and many others reading this have not been), he survived the treatment and after 5 years of follow ups, he was deemed cured. To everyone else, I should be elated. However, in his surgery, he suffered a stroke, which has had physical impacts on him since then, and he has massive learning difficulties now too. But these are things which nobody else sees or understands are still ongoing, and may be for life. But for us as parents, every time he stumbles, or can't keep up with the other kids his age, or fails a test it is a reminder of his cancer and of the the experience we went through with him. And it breaks my heart for him that he will be impacted by it for the rest of his life. I am also racked with guilt that I don't feel ecstatic about his survival, as I know what others are going through when the cancer is terminal, however even 8 years after it all happening, I still cry and my chest gets tight when I remember it all, and I have these daily reminders. I feel like it is just following us around, and I have never been able to be the person I was before, nor have I been able to let go of the anxiety. I'm really just wondering if anyone else is going through anything similar, or if anyone can give some advice on how long it took them to feel normal again after their child going through and surviving cancer. If you feel like I should just shut up and be grateful, then please feel free to comment that too. I don't know if I'm purposefully wallowing in self pity, or if this is actually something which other people go through.

Apologies again if this isn't the right place to ask something like this. And to everyone going through this shitshow, I can't find any way to make it better for you, but I can just say that you're not alone in feeling how you are.

My mom was diagnosed with breast cancer in 2023 and after about a year of chemo and a double mastectomy, she is now in remission! 🩷

One of the ways I hyped her up when she first started chemo was by telling her about chemo curls. She always hated how limp and straight her hair was, so it was kind of like a, “Hey, it’s gonna suck but maybe you’ll get a new hair texture!” thing.

Well she did! Her hair was graying a little before chemo and it grew back in completely salt and pepper gray. She also got chemo curls, but they’re loose little ringlets and not crazy curls. She loves it. She looks a lot like a gray haired Jenna Fischer (who I’m glad also beat bc 🩷).

My mom really enjoys learning how to take care of her curly hair and she wants to do color rinses like a lil old lady from the 1960s to give herself fun highlights (when she’s approved to use hair dye again). I would feel really bad if, in a few months, it goes back to being brown and stick-straight.

However, now I’m learning the changes chemo causes to hair regrowth aren’t usually permanent. I would love to hear from those of you who have been through chemo, did any changes it made to your hair stick around? Or did you end up going back to growing the same hair as before treatment in the end? If it makes a difference, her mom had salt and pepper hair with curls in her old age but I don’t think her mom ever went through chemotherapy.

How do you guys cope with pain management after surgery? I am 8 weeks post op and still having shooting nerve pain and muscle aching especially at night. I am allergic to NSAIDs and hate the way Oxy or tramadol makes me feel. Gabapentin is ok but I think I am building a tolerance to it. I am thinking about asking the doctor for Ambian so I can just sleep through it. I just want to know if anybody’s had success with anything else.

A close family friend’s 4-year-old was just diagnosed with leukemia. We’d like to support them in ways that are actually helpful.

For the child in the hospital: what kinds of toys, comfort items, or activities work well for a 4-year-old who will be spending long days in treatment?

For his older brother at home: what can help him cope with being without his best friend for a while? Any toy or activity suggestions that might keep him engaged and feeling cared for?

For the parents: practical support ideas are welcome too.

Would love advice from anyone who has been through something similar. what truly helps and what makes a difference? thank you!

Both better to me and to others. I used to be really harsh on myself for making a simple mistake. Now I accept I am just a human who is going to die anyway and I can't beat myself up all the time. I used to get mad at people for not behaving the way I think they should. Now I just let them be. Strangely enough I feel more at peace after my cancer diagnosis. And these white clouds and blue sky are awesome to look at everyday!

35f, stage 3b melanoma in 2022, now NED

My unc has been fighting cancer for almost a year now - his right lung is failing and is filling with water and now his left lung is slowly shrinking. Am sorry for my bad English but is it possible to beat cancer?

I have Stage 4 rectal cancer. Already been through CAPOX, Irinotecan/Erbitux, and recently CAPOX again which I needed to stop due to major side effect issues. If my next scan shows any growth, my doctor is considering going to Lonsurf for oral chemo. Anyone have any experience they can share?

F, just turned 64. I downsized after the first wave of AI swept through my industry, moving from AZ to Texas to be near my sister in Oct '23. I discovered a lump in my breast in Jan '24 - no family history of breast cancer. From there, I was launched into the spiral of find a new doctor and get referred for a mammogram (nightmare), which quickly turned into scans, surgery, and then months of chemo and radiation, leaving me dazed, disoriented, and barely able to walk.

Three months of intensive cancer rehab followed treatment, which transitioned to workouts in the gym when my deductible reset for 2025. I've been trying to heal but it's so hard when I'm exhausted all the time. This year, I've had to have three molars removed due to chemo damage. Chemo also pushed me fully into diabetic territory, and now I'm on Ozempic, barf all the time and can barely eat. I feel awful most days, but people keep telling me every day how great I look. It's wildly at odds with what I feel.

In Mar/Apr, my oncologist said I was in remission, no evidence of cancer, and could go to 6 month check-up intervals. I'm also in an important Phase 3 breast cancer research trial. All great. And today is my one year anniversary of finishing active treatment, yay, me! But as I sit here, I'm trying hard not to spiral and I'm losing that game. This coming Tuesday, I was supposed to undergo a full knee replacement, but suddenly it's going to be a bone scan because some of my liver enzymes spiked. I also had a pelvic ultrasound this week because I've been having abdominal pain, which showed something like a fibroid in my uterus, which is going to require another referral. (No ovaries due to recurring tumors) The significance of the areas in question is not lost on me.

I'm trying not to freak out, but it feels like my body has been screaming all year that something is wrong while everyone has said, be patient, you just need time, no we're keeping an eye on that, don't worry, yada yada. How do you handle the big scary "what ifs" that come along with sudden change and still manage to stay calm? Any suggestions? Just typing this out has made me a feel a little better. Argh. Thanks for reading.

Erin

Hello everyone, I didn’t want to feel alone in this situation but I wanted to know who is going through terminal stage and how are you coping? Thank you 🙏

Context, I already suffered with anxiety before all this (anxiety and panic attacks and am on an SSRI and have clonazepam for as needed though I hate to rely on it because it took me a long while to titrate off of it from consistently taking it back when I was adjusting my SSRI when my brother passed in November)

But I am gearing up to go in for my 3rd inpatient round of chemo tomorrow, and the anxiety of it all is just hitting me like a truck. And I get upset at myself for already hitting that point where I no longer feel stoic and strong willed and it’s only been 2 rounds. I don’t look forward to being checked every 2hours and tasting the alcohol swab when they check the return on my port. Being tethered to the pole and having to get up so often cus of the fluids. I’m starting to hate my pj set I wear because it reminds me of being in the hospital. My bag I’ve designated my hospital bag as well, putting off setting it up because it just brings me back to being inpatient. The inevitable nausea hitting me by day 2, and lasting a week and a half. Feeling so weak by discharge that it’s exhausting even having to walk to the washroom.

Knowing I’m going to be at the halfway mark now and gearing up for repeat scans and a surgery game plan that’s going to most likely consist of a total knee replacement and part of my femur removed. It’s just all coming at me, and I’m rightfully anxious. And I hate it.

Hello. So my mom is in remission for lung and brain cancer. Although she’s been dealing with her pancreatic cancer since fall. She’s been doing good. Except recently things have been really bad.

She doesn’t want to eat or drink. We’ve been getting her to drink ensure drinks and little meals. She fainted on Sunday.. stopped breathing for a bit. We took her to the ER at a Sanford location. They took her labs and everything was normal.. so they said they can’t admit her. Same thing happened yesterday too. Their excuse was “it’s a side effect of chemo.” I know this is not that.

She has lost about 30-40lbs in the last 6 weeks. She now has a hard time walking, going to the bathroom, etc. She is sleeping a lot. She threw up yesterday at the ER. All liquids, no chunks. I’m very scared that this is resembling end stage pancreatic cancer/failure. I don’t want her to die. I’m only 22. I need my mom.

Is there any way to get her admitted? Is there anything I can do for her to help her more than getting her to eat? Please help me.

In my journey I have had two times I have felt extremely anxious. The first time was just after Nero surgery and the second time occurred when I was waiting for my scan results. Both times I could swear my dad, who passed a couple years ago stopped by to tell me it was going to be ok and both times I received good news. The first time I felt his presence, I felt a hand squeeze mine while I was laying in recovery and the second time I saw a billboard advertising his favourite breakfast sandwich in a place that was in the middle of nowhere. Anyone else experience something like that?

Hey, I posted a couple days ago about starting chemo for AML (it’s been about two weeks). Things got really bad, and I wanted to update because I don’t really know anyone else who’s been through this. I ended up in septic shock, and the doctors said it’s life threatening.

It started with a small fever and feeling really weak. At first, I thought it was just chemo side effects, but it got worse really fast. My whole body started feeling off, and my feet even went purple. That part really freaked me out.

I’ve been in the hospital since, on IV antibiotics, fluids, and other treatments to try to stabilize me. I’m still not feeling much better yet everything is exhausting, and it’s scary how quickly something like this can get dangerous.

Chemo was already really hard, and now dealing with septic shock on top of it makes everything feel even more overwhelming. I just wanted to share this

Hi everyone,

I’m a leukemia survivor — diagnosed at 19 — and I know firsthand how isolating the journey through cancer and recovery can feel. Finding people who truly understand what you’re going through can make a huge difference.

I’ve created a Discord community specifically for people recovering from cancer and other serious illnesses. It’s a safe, supportive space to: • 💬 Share your experiences, challenges, and victories • 🤝 Connect with others who truly understand the journey • 🌟 Receive and offer encouragement in a positive, understanding environment

Whether you’re in treatment, post-treatment, or supporting someone else, this is a place where you won’t feel alone.

🔗 Join us here: https://discord.gg/8xSqPhRh

We’re building a community of hope and support — because recovery is easier when you’re not doing it alone. 💙

I just want to get this out, I'm not looking for advice or to fix what I feel. I just recently woke up from an induced coma, all due to severe seizures and, the truth is, a lot more happened, but I prefer not to lengthen the story. Today, my cancer and things don't even seem like the most serious thing anymore; (although it is) what really bothers me is how I feel inside. My mind and emotions are a mess: I feel totally out of place, I understand almost nothing of what is happening and, to make matters worse, I have the feeling that I forgot a lot of things that were previously my daily routine and my life...

It's like being in an unknown place, although in theory I should feel “safe” because there are people nearby, but I don't feel comfortable with anyone and I don't have anyone to turn to even for a hug to help me put a stop to all this. Paranoia invades me, my head keeps creating strange scenarios, stories that feel too real. I also started psychiatric medications and I feel that they are very strong, everything feels even more blurry. Honestly, I'm lost, completely adrift, and it's so hard for me to admit it out loud and I just wanted to express it at least in a place where I hope not to be judged, I'm not looking for anything more than to express myself... Thanks for reading.

All of the stuffs i read is about two or three short-term survivors, but we can live more than ten years?

My beautiful 3 year old boy lost his battle with neuroblastoma in mid-August. We are busy planning his funeral celebration and it is surprising how joyful it has been to simply talk about his favourite music, share photos and memories. Every day is rough, but there are bright spots of joy.

To all of you still fighting, or fighting for one you love, our hearts go out to you. Fill your days with brightness if you can and keep loving each other xx

First course of chemo & radio treatment appears to have failed, moving me from an 80+% survival rate category to < 20% (radio & chemo resistant oropharyngeal cancer). I made a living by talking, so being mute isn’t an option. I tried my first speaking heavy event early this month and it was a disaster.

As I was being put under this week for another biopsy, I found myself praying that I wouldn’t wake up. I was pretty disappointed when I did.

My ex wives have taken almost all of my savings. I’m in my 50s. I have no insurance. I’m unable to work consistently because of issues with my throat, pain & pain med side effects. My last remnants of retirement savings are rapidly being drained.

I really don’t want to spend the next 5 years living like this. I probably only have savings for 2 years anyway.

It may be selfish of me but “living for my kids” or “living for my girlfriend” isn’t motivating. It just feels like another burden.

How do you keep going?