r/converts • u/dgdg4213 • 2d ago
How long did it take you to tell your family?
So I reverted a few days ago. My dad is very hardcore Christian and my mom kinda has her own beliefs in God. Anyways, I wanted to tell them yesterday but the right moment just didn't come up. I'm nervous how they'd react, I don't even think they'd react bad I guess just the unknown of such a change makes it hard for me to tell them. How long did it take you guys to tell your family about you becoming Muslim?
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u/Depr3ssed_owl 2d ago
I told them a few months after reverting but I will say there's no right time to tell anyone but when you are ready. Take your time. Also make sure you are safe and depending on if you're dependent on them, male sure you have a 'safety net' if they react badly even if you don't think they will. People are complicated and can react unexpectedly.
Unfortunately for me my parents didn't take it well so I just want to warn you. Of course every family is different. Hope everything goes well for you when you do tell them and may Allah make it pass easily. Ameen.
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u/Mysterious-Idea4925 2d ago
Took about 4 or 6 weeks before my husband straight out asked me, and I told him yes. Things blew up and were bad. About 2 weeks later, I put on my 1-piece prayer dress, and he stayed in the bedroom while I dressed in the living room. This went on for 2 weeks. When I came home, he asked if this was how I would dress at home, and I took my abhaya off and made him dinner.
I was concentrating on applying Islamic marital principles. Didn't work very well. He said numerous times that I broke our marriage covenant. I had found (inadvertently) a web page up on his phone regarding divorce laws in our state.
But at this point, he started talking about divorce and talking about me moving out. I was terrified because I am partially disabled from injuries and botched surgeries and on pain management. Add that to working a physical job (nurse) only part-time. I have no family to rely on for help.
He started learning and developed acceptance. I had an electronic prayer mat delivered and asked him for help with a screwdriver to put batteries in. He immediately took care of it, and it started playing the adhan, and he was pressing buttons to quiet it down. He walked up to me and said, "Praise Allah!"
And we laughed.
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u/sulaymanf 2d ago
I didn’t tell them but they figured out after a few days that I was waking up early for fajr.
I agree with others commenting, wait until the time is right. When you’re a new Muslim they may have a lot of questions and you want to make sure you’re able to answer them when you have a stronger Iman. My parents wanted me to see the priest to see if he could talk me out of it but his answers weren’t convincing when you actually know what Islam is and the better alternative it offers.
My family sees themselves as strong Christians too and they were really upset in the beginning. That can be normal. I recommend having a plan if you need to take a few days apart. But after time it got better; they saw I’m not a worse person and I’m more patient. They met my Muslim friends and realized they’re normal looking people and not a bad influence. It just took time for them. Now they cook halal food for me, which was unthinkable in the beginning.
If you need some comfort, know that the sahabas went through the same thing you’re going through. And God rewarded them. Patience is the best good feed because of how hard it can be sometimes.
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u/ericfromct 2d ago
Six months for my mom, she’s the only one I’ve told. I don’t plan to tell anyone in my extended family, they’ll figure it out one day, but I don’t think anyone in my immediate family would care besides my mom. So after I told her I didn’t feel a need to tell anyone else.
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u/WhyNotIslam 2d ago edited 2d ago
Assalamu'alaikum wrwb dear brother
Very happy to hear about your conversion and may Allah keep you firm and steadfast and increase you in knowledge and reward you immensely
I suggest if you're not sure how they will take it then you slowly introduce the idea. For example you say "I made a new friend today and he was telling me about his faith and I learned all these new things like did you know that Muslims believe in Jesus too"
Basically you start planting the idea in their mind and trying to undo the islamophobia this country teaches and you get an idea of how they react to Islam
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u/mandzeete 2d ago
Approximately one year. My mother was an Atheist. A religion never existed in our family and we saw religious people as mentally ill lunatics. Having Jehovah Witnesses knocking on our door did not make it any better (a real example of lunatics who were annoying us). But as I got an offer to participate in a dawah course in another country then I just had to tell that I'm traveling to this and that place and because of being a Muslim. Surely, my mother did not like it at all but I could not hide it either, any more.
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u/berrysalad22 2d ago
My dad showed up at my work unexpectedly where I was wearing hijab a few weeks after taking my shahadah. It didn't bode well and I got kicked out, but alhamdulillah we're doing better 6 years later. They are super evangelical Christians and try to sway me, but I grey rock or refute any points now
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u/GreenBettyfrog 2d ago
I’m still on my journey. But I’ve talked about it with my mom. She said she is a Muslim by conviction. But hasn’t taken the Shahada. I became a Christian. Because it is a normal thing to do and I wanted to be close to God. My mother said I should not convert to Islam. As it would take away my credibility.
Make a choice and stick with it.
But that’s my story. Not yours
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u/GreenBettyfrog 2d ago
I’m still on my journey. But I’ve talked about it with my mom. She said she is a Muslim by conviction. But hasn’t taken the Shahada. I became a Christian. Because it is a normal thing to do and I wanted to be close to God. My mother said I should not convert to Islam. As it would take away my credibility.
Make a choice and stick with it.
But that’s my story. Not yours
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u/CriticalAd299 2d ago
You have professed your faith to the one that matters (Allah). It’s not about anyone else but you and our creator
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u/clouvelle 2d ago
Mine just found out eventually and started abusing me so after a point I just went all in and started screaming the shahada to their face out of frustration they tried to kill me lol