I just want to cry everytime I look at myself now.

After I had a baby I have no time for my hair. I dont really have belp around me and I slack a lot in the "me time" department. I tried braids, bonnets what have you, but my hair would get matted to the point where my scalp would get sore and it would take a pound of conditioner to fix it, only for it to get rematted again in a couple weeks. It became impossible.
Braiding it took too much time. Bonnets were a sensory nightmare. Buns and ponytails would just make it matt faster. Again. No one really to watch the baby long enough for me to figure it out.

The only solution was to cut it. Even now. My baby is 10 months old and Its still just me. I dont think "waiting it out" was an option either. The tangles were painful and I would rush and it was just too stressful

But man oh man is it a terrible haircut.

I guess its fine for now, its me and the baby in the house for the most part. But in a couple months, I will be going back to work and I am finding this length difficult to manage. It takes just as much time but does not look nearly as pretty when I am done. I dont want to go to interviews and eventually a brand new job with hair like this but theres nothing left to do but wait it out.

I am considering buying a wig??

I dont know. I am just really bummed. My hair was a really big part of my identity and I had to let it go due to a lack of a village. I know its just hair but I am sad about it.

My routine is Ouidad clariflying shampoo Miss Jessies multicultural conditioner Ouidad leave in Miss jessies multicultural curl cream Airdry

There are a few things I want to change, specially to have less hair close to the front and use gel at the end instead of mousse, but I really love it! What do you all think?

Hair routine: -Tresemme curly shampoo and conditioner -Brush shampoo through in the shower with a wet brush -Rake conditioner through hair with fingers -Rinse out excess conditioner at the very end of my shower -Remove some excess water and rake Not Your Mother’s mousse through (use more than you think) -Squeeze out excess water until no longer dripping wet -Use a brush with those prongs on the side to style and clump curls -Scrunch in more mousse (or NYM gel for more hold) -Plop for ~15 minutes -Air dry or diffuse to dry -Final scrunch with hair oil

I was a skeptic. I didn’t want to believe the hype. And then I tried it . . . RIP my wallet. 🥹

Routine: 1. Clarify with Malibu C Hard Water Wellness 2. Redken All Soft shampoo 3. Redken All Soft conditioner; detangle with wide tooth comb 4. Leave some of the conditioner in during rinsing 5. Praying hands coat with Miche Anti-Humidity Gel; scrunch 6. Dry with hood dryer or diffuser 7. Scrunch to break cast

First pic is right after my haircut and second is 2 months post haircut. My hairdresser was super knowledgeable and I’ve been using the tips she’s given me. Idk if I’ve ever found a hairdresser I trust/love this much. My hair is still kinda adjusting but I’m loving this new routine

Lazy Routine:

Shampoo/conditioner: Ouidad climate control Apply Ouidad climate control gel after conditioner to lock in moisture The doux crazy/sexy/curl mousse A little bit more gel to prevent frizz

If I want more definition I’ll add the gel then mix the mousse and gel together, apply in sections, and define with a brush

I have always had long heavy hair, at its longest and thickest I didn't need to straighten it, the weight of it did. That is except the ringlets I would sometimes get in the shorter hair beside my ears. My hair is thinner these days and I recently cut off around 8 inches of damaged hair from previous bleaching. The quick routine I tried after my shower tonight was brush, shampoo, put conditioner on, scrunch, rinse, apply gel, scrunch dry with a towel then diffuser. I can't decide if my hair just looks messy, or if there are some very abused curls in there trying to break free. Thoughts?

I've been struggling with my hair for sometime now. I'm hesitant to jump fully into CGM as I can't really afford to spend a lot on products right now, especially when you factor in the trial an error. I’m also afraid of the maintenance as it seems like quite a lot of work. That being said, I'm fed up of how my hair looks and I really don’t think it suits me. I would like advice on what to do with it and how to avoid it looking so awkward all the time, in particular, the weird triangle when I wear it down and how frizzy it is at the top.

Some background info:

• I have never dyed it (box or professional)
• I rarely use heat (maybe 3-4 times a year) I haven't cut it since November 2024
• I'm using an anti-frizz shampoo but clearly it's not doing much
• I use one of those towel wrap things to get the water out and then let it air dry

My routine: - First shampoo: Aussie Hair Miracle Moist - Second shampoo: Being Bye Bye Frizz Smoothing Shampoo for wavy hair - Maybe twice a month I use a hair mask: Garnier Ultimate Blends Hair Remedy Repairing Mask - Conditioner: Being Nourish + Shine Daily Clean Conditioner for all hair types

Thanks!

Do you guys have any tricks to get more defined curls that dont include sitting there and finger coiling each curl? I've done that in the past and it's just so time consuming. Usually the front of my hair is okay, like in my bangs, but I also tend to hand twist those more while the back of my head just does whatever it feels like. Any advice is appreciated!

Routine: shampoo with matrix, condition with shea intensive hydration, scrunch dry with an old shirt, i use a mix of curls creme brule whipped curl cream and design essential mousse to style, let air dry (in this photo I attempted to use a diffuser to style)

I love a great Day 2 and beyond! Routine (this time): Washed with Pantene Nutrient Blends Strengthening Damage Repair shampoo, conditioned with Aussie 3 minute miracle curls Leave in: rhyme & reason Quench & Curl The Doux Crazy Sexy Curls & Bonita Bubble Balm. Scrunched & separated after dry with árgan oil

Taking care of curly hair has been an extremely long journey and I wanted to share my routine and thoughts on products as I continue to search for “better” routines.

Back in 2016 I started my curly journey learning about DevaCurl and DevaCuts. I quickly incorporated many of their products and for a while it worked. My poofy frizzy hair actually had definition. From treating my hair like you would straight hair to actually doing what it desperately needed, I finally gained confidence in wearing my hair down and naturally curly.

After the lawsuits etc. came out about DevaCurl I moved away from their products but still used the Devafuser and got DevaCuts.

Next in my journey was Umberto Giannani. This was a great affordable hairline that I used for 2 and a half years. Products used: Curl Magic Shampoo and Conditioner Curl Magic Mask Growth Tonic Banana Butter

After my hair “got use to it” I switched it up in 2022 and started using LUS haircare. I used the Shampoo, Conditioner, and All in one cream. I tried the deep repair mask-wasn’t a fan. *I do still currently use the LUS elixir oil and the clarifying scalp scrub

I felt like my hair looked nice with LUS but that it had the potential to look better.

• also with LUS I used Curlsmith In shower Styler as my strong hold gel and the Curlsmith Bond Salve once a month

*I also got really into using hair oiling instead of masks. Some that I use include Red Pimento Oil, Fable and Mane, Coconut Oil, and Amla Oil I still use a hair oil treatment once a week leaving in for 2-6 hours and steam treat it with the Pattern Beauty steamer or use a hot head for a quicker treatment

Next on my list is innersense beauty. I really wanted to love the shampoo/conditioner but they were just too heavy on my hair-both the Pure Harmony line and the Hydrating Line I also tried the sweet spritz leave in, detox mask, and hydrating mask-I didn’t like them either. My hair stylist used I create volume and I create curl memory- I still use these two as a combo and have good results.

Since the shampoo and conditioner was weighing my hair down, I decided to search for a new brand and stumbled upon a recent launch of the Cecred Haircare Line. I purchased travel kits for all products. LOVED the shampoo and conditioner and am still using to this day. Felt the masks were alright but not the best, the only one I felt really worked was the fermented rose water one but it was the most expensive and time consuming so currently searching for something else.

Along with the shampoo and conditioner, I decided to look to another brand for a mousse on my in between wash days and found Ouidad VitaCurl and Whipped Curls. I prefer VitaCurl when I need more definition and Whipped curls for when I need more moisture.

Currently looking into new stylers and oils, stay tuned for results as I continue my journey towards better curly hair.

Products used in this photo: LUS Shampoo & Conditioner LUS all in one curly cream LUS Elixir Oil

Products used atm: Hair oil once a week,Curlsmith Bond Salve once a month, LUS scalp scrub to get hair oil out

Cecred Hydrating shampoo and conditioner LUS Elixir Hair Oil Innersense I create volume & I create curl memory Off days:VitaCurl Ouidad Mousse

For reference I have thick 3B curls with medium porosity. Hope my hair journey can inspire others and hope to learn more about other routines to make mine better.

Hey, so my hair has always been thick and a bit difficult to handle (except if I blow dry it with a brush and some product) otherwise it’s a bit frizzy and has its own little head haha anyways I tried the squish method with regular conditioner and put some gel in my wet hair and squished. I couldn’t figure out how to use a diffuser so I’m just letting it air dry for now. It’s still a bit moist and I didn’t use a t shirt just a regular towel. So it was mostly winging it. Is that curly or wavy or is it just messy and I squeezed it into place? Thank you for helping me out ♥️

Ok, for context, I straightened my hair this week. I KNOWWWW, I know. I don't know what possessed me. So it is currently straight.

Last time I washed immediately after straightening though, it turned out incredible for me (see attached images - not sure why I'm being so extra about covering my face but there we go haha).

Basically, do I take the risk and just wash and style it tomorrow morning given that this is what happened last time (knowing that curly hair never does the same thing twice! 😡)?

Orrrrrrrrrr, do I wash today to try and get some of the curl back and get some moisture in, then wash and style again tomorrow morning?

Washing and styling tonight isn't an option. I've got a lot better about preserving my curls, but they still look limp and sometimes a bit matted lol. Given I've got an interview, I know this would just stress me out and I'd end up doing it all over again.

I know it could go any way really, but a bit of curly advice would be much appreciated!

EDIT:

Also, any advice for helping definition in that back top bit would be vvv welcome! I diffuse upside down, then side to side, always trying to avoid a flat back, and get some volume. But almost always, that bit ends up frizzy, flat, and a bit matted-looking.

EDIT:
Think this was blocked as I hadn't put my routine.

Products:

• Umberto Giannini Curl Jelly Shampoo
• Skala Babosa
  • (I know Skala's a bit divisive, but I've been really liking their range. I think for hair like mine on the boundary between wavy and curly, it’s pretty good. Babosa isn’t my usual but was the only one they had at the shop and I’ve been loving it.)
• Umberto Giannini Thirsty Curls conditioner as curl cream
• Umberto Giannini Curl Jelly scrunching gel
• Wella Shockwaves Level 5 mousse
  • Weirdly, I’ve found the cheaper mousses work best for me. Result!
• Umberto Giannini Heat Shield heat protectant
• Microfibre towel 
• Hair dryer with diffuser

Current routine:

• Shampoo with Umberto Giannini Curl Jelly Shampoo
• Skala Babosa as conditioner - detangle then leave in for about 10 mins
• Rinse out
• Rake through a little bit of Umberto Giannini Thirsty Curls conditioner as curl cream
• Head upside down
• Scrunch in Umberto Giannini Curl Jelly scrunching gel
  • I switched to the Boho Beach Jelly for a bit thinking it’d be lighter so better for my waves, but they just came out limp.
• Scrunch in a tiny bit of Wella Shockwaves Level 5 mousse to ends, and add a bit to roots
• Finally get out of shower and crick neck
• Go to room to start mammoth task of drying
• Spray Umberto Giannini Heat Shield
• Depending on frizz level, add a bit more mousse
• Plop curls very very gently with microfibre towel till no longer soaking wet
• Head upside-down again (and apologise to neck)
• In sections, gently put curls into diffuser and - placing the diffuser head against my scalp - diffuse on medium heat and medium-high speed
• Diffuse all around from a distance
• Flip head up slowly
• Curls in diffuser head against scalp again - side to side, avoiding creating a hair part
• Upside down again and repeat whole thing until dry
• Contemplate life decisions
• Once dry, decide it was all worth it 
• Thank the universe for giving me this hair, but curse it for such a poisoned chalice

Hi, all! I’ve been embracing my natural curls since 2019/2020 (before then I’d been damaging my hair with straightenings because my mom and I simply didn’t know how to manage it 😔)

I like the way my hair looks now, but I’d love to have the same definition some of yall have! I guess I haven’t found the right curl-accommodating stylist yet, since everyone seems to have a different opinion of what curl type I actually am.

Routine: every other day I condition with silicone-free Pantene conditioner. Lately, though, I’ve been replacing it with Not Your Mother’s hair mask. Every other wash, I shampoo with Bedhead 2. After showering, I either air dry my hair or put Pattern cream or Not Your Mother’s/Herbal Essence curl mousse. This is where I run into trouble—as you can see, my curls just don’t form with as much definition as I’d like. I sleep on a silk pillow with my hair up. I usually (mostly, honestly) wear my hair up in a scrunchie bun or ponytail. I just want to have organized curls so I can wear it down once in a while.

Thanks, y’all! I appreciate how supportive this community is 🥹 I hope to look as amazing as the folks I see here sometimes!

I guess I have Caucasian type of curls (even tho I'm from middle Asia my grandma is russian), thick and in between medium and low porosity. At the from they are defined and kinda ok. But in the back it's flat, almost straight and frizzy as fuck. There are no curly hairdressers in my city, I once went for a cut and... its visible on the photos. Recently cut my owns bangs, idek just got bored . I've discovered that I have curly hair about 2 years ago, and it was a struggle since. Tried different products, different techniques. Never did my hair make me feel pretty. It's just a mess, and for a year I hid it in a ponytail which made me look horrible too. I'm exhausted by the curly hair routine. Conditioner, leave in, gel, (mousse) are the bare minimum, I have to soak my hair DRIPPING wet, spread the products differently on every side of my head so that curls aren't flat,scrunch, diffuse every little section for half an hour and melt my arms off just to end up with frizz or curls clumped together, then wear that pineapple bun with that satin bonnet that will fly off my head anyway. And it stays somehow 'good' just for a day. I gotta do refresh EVERY. SINGLE. MORNING. I'm getting overstimulated about it, i don't always have energy for it and make a ponytail, ruining the curls structure entirely 'till I wash my hair again. And the worst part is, it always turns out bad! No matter what effort I put, it's hideous. Tried going out with hair down, got insecure too fast. It's bulky, big, and just in the way! Wanted to add wild, but it's a cool word. And my hair aren't. It's a fucking triangle or a lion mane. I'm so jealous of people with straight hair that can wake up, brush their hair and go where they need. I want it so bad. I'm sick of everything related to CuRls. help Gonna delete soon

Hey y'all! I posted my online dating profile for a review and I was told my hair looks "old lady" or "grandma-esque." Any ideas on how to style it so it looks younger?

Routine:

-Olaplex hair treatment 1-2x a week

-Washing with not your mother's shampoo 2x a week

-Olaplex deep conditioner 2-3x a week

Product:

-Not your mother's gel

-Not your mother's hair cream

Thanks so much!

hi ! i’ve been wearing my natural curls down for like 7 years now but i’ve never felt like i fully understood what my hair needed. i’ve tried so many different products and done all the porosity tests etc but my hair remains an enigma to me lol. it often feels frizzy and dry/straw-like, but gets weighed down by product easily and throwing conditioner/leave-ins at it makes it overly soft and limp. when i use leave ins and gels some parts of it look super greasy and others still bone dry. this photo is my hair just washed with conditioner, no other products and no brushing or blow drying (don’t usually wear my curls like this, but i’m trying to see what my baseline is).

routine: i often just wear my hair in braids but when i wear it curly, my routine is shea moisture apple cider vinegar shampoo, a variety of conditioners i’ve tried, and the as i am leave in. then i use miss jessie’s pillow soft and a denman to style and blow dry.

(also i know it’s crooked i’m growing it out from a diy mullet and don’t wanna pay for a salon cut lol)

So before pregnancy my hair pattern was much more curly than what it is now, I’d say 3a/b and a couple 2c pieces throughout. I followed a consistent method with my hair, washing it once a week (shampoo roots/scalp, rinse, shampoo again letting it run through ends, rinse, condition, detangle with wide tooth comb, rinse), for products I would start with not your mothers curl cream and rake it through my hair, then use the same brand gel and scrunch it in, let it air dry 90% and then use nou hair oil to scrunch out cast.

HOWEVER, since about halfway through pregnancy to now 9 months pp, it just does not do what it’s supposed to do????? I have tried switching up the routine and everything. At first I thought it was how much it had grown because this is the longest my hair has been like ever, but even with a refreshing cut with a bunch of layers it now ON A GOOD DAY might be half 2b/half straight and nothing but frizz! The only thing that seems to give it any more oomph is if I get rained on hahaha

Did anyone else experience this and if so what did you do to get your hair back? I don’t even care if my curl pattern has just changed, but it’s so frizzy and dull and lifeless now I just look like I don’t know what I’m doing!

Hi guys! So im not exactly sure if my hair is even curly or if its just super wavy. I feel like its between 2c and 3a.

The pictures are what my hair looks like a few hours after waking up if I don’t mess with my bedhead too much. After styling it doesn’t look that great, the curls are no longer tight like in these pictures, they become loose.

I want my hair to look like in the pictures above but without the frizz. I need your help!

Heres my current routine:

1. Tresseme Bondplex Shampoo. Massage scalp for a bit and then the rest of the hair.

2. Scrunch in Tresseme anti frizz conditioner starting at the ends.

3. Scrunch with a t shirt until it’s a little wet but not too wet.

4. Apply the L’ Oreal Paris Elnett Creme de Mousse for hold.

(Also- I’m looking for a low budget minimalist routine as I really don’t have the budget to invest in a lot of products right now)

routine im using based shampoo and conditioner shea leave in and based, not together i change it up some days,and jamacian black castor oil air dryed and i use satin pillow cases

Hi everyone, I need y'all's help with my hair type. I am really trying to create a better routine for my curls and actually start to like them and wear them down. Its typically in a bun all the time. This is it without any products after I washed it. Took about 40 minutes to fully dry. I don't have any products that are my holy grail. I've tried expensive and drugstore products and nothing seems to really work well. The only consistent thing that I've done is gotten a Quidad cut, which helps thin out my hair, but it still ends up being really thick in the top 1/4, and then the ends are thinner. My main goal is to grow my hair, my entire life, which has always been what I desired but not much has worked. Any help would be greatly appreciated!

I'm at a point where I don't know how to make my hair look good. The curls at the top are tighter and it looks like it's weirdly shorter even tho it's the same length as the rest. Any advice would be appreciated. Maybe a way to style it or a haircut I should get. Some people suggested a mullet, but I don't think I can pull it off.

Routine: Clarifying shampoo and hair mask once a week Leave in conditioner Curl cream Let it airdry

Mid week: Conditioner Leave in conditioner Curl cream Let it airdry

General question?

So, I’ve been embracing my curls since February. My curl pattern had massively improved and I can really see my actual pattern now and I think I have my routine down….. except I can’t get past day 1.

Generally I wash when my hair needs it which sometimes its once a week and sometimes it’s twice. I have general haircare down as I used to be a hairdresser. But I cannot for the life of me figure out what my hair wants when it comes to sleeping. I have tried raw dogging it and just sleeping, I have tried a silk bonnet, I have a tried a pineapple, I have tried a mix. I always wake up with my ends straight and messed up curls. I have really curly pieces all over and it takes pretty much zero effort and not a lot of product to define my curls. But I always wake up looking like one of those videos where someone needed a massive haircut to revive their curls.

I cut my hair about 10 weeks ago and it made a small difference, but not very noticeable. I just cut over two inches off it tonight but I know that I will wake up tomorrow and my hair will be completely lifeless and stringy. I don’t think I’m using too much product because theres no residue left on my hair after I scrunch out the crunch.

I have waves more than curls but I do have some ringlets. I think I’m right on the cusp of full blown curls because generally my pattern is tight waves. If my hair lasts overnight I will have loose waves from day 3 onwards.

Here is my normal routine: - a quick brush with a detangling brush before I shower (I usually brush my hair out so I can put it up in a pony tail with a braid towards the end of a wash so it’s never really knotted too bad) - 2 shampoos with Garnier Hair Food Aloe Vera shampoo - Condition using the matching Aloe Vera mask - Detangle while conditioner is in using a detangling brush (I barely get any tugs) - Rinse and lightly squeeze out the water that is pouring, leaving it dripping - Rake through Umberto Giannini curl crème - Section my hair in to 3 sections, brush through and define each section using a curl defining brush - Scrunch in Cantu curl defining mousse with avocado oil (I am obsessed with this product and Im not open to changing it. It gives me so much definition and some hold) - Scrunch in Umberto Giannini scrunching Jelly and scrunch out the heavy wet with a microfibre hair towel -With my head fully up I start to hover diffuse until the gel cast starts to form, tip my head over and dry my roots all over. -Once my roots are dry I will lightly cup my hair in my hands and dry each section for about 20-30 seconds depending on where the section is on my head. My top section is a little looser. This provides a lot of definition for me. I usually do this all over at least once but not more than 3 times -I tip my head back up and hover diffuse all over until nearly dry. I air dry the rest of the way and leave my cast in as long as possible -Scrunch out the crunch with Olaplex bonding oil

Today I did it a little different because I chopped 2 inches off and I also used the olaplex bond builder before my shampoo.

I clarify when I can feel build up which is generally every 3 weeks or so. I don’t play with my hair between washes. I only style my hair curly and sometimes I even sacrifice a wash day where I don’t use any styling products and just let my hair air dry how it wants to. I will generally wet my hair down and restyle on day 3

I just want to know how I can get nice day 2 hair. I really haven’t figured out what works for me. The picture is me now, pre scrunching of the crunch and post haircut

Hello! I have 2B and 2C (maybe 3A at the bottom) textures all around my head. The top of my head is the least curly and is giving me the most problems.

I started my curly hair journey since about 2018. My hair was constantly straightened before that. I cut it all off and I’ve been kind of struggling since.

In 2022, my hair was almost to my shoulders, I stupidly bleached it and dyed it a bright blue. But my hair was still in pretty good condition for the most part. I did deep conditioners, oils, etc. My hair looked so beautiful and moisturized. What really killed my hair is that after awhile I used a black hair dye that was on the cheaper side and it totally ruined my entire head. My hair was super thin, dry, gross looking. I cut it all off again.

My hair now is basically an outgrown pixie cut. But it still feels ruined. My hair constantly feels like straw. It’s always dry. I’ve gotten trims every few months and my hair will feel fine for the first few days but go right back to having these ridiculous split ends. I feel like my hair isn’t even growing out anymore.

My hair care routine consists of;

Garnier Fructis Clarifying Shampoo once a week.

Not Your Mothers Curl Talk Shampoo every 2 days.

Not your mother’s Daily Nutrition Apple Butter Mask as a conditioner.

Miss Jessie’s Multi Cultural Curls Leave in

Hollywood Beauty Jojoba oil

….I used to use Not your mothers Curl Talk Gel but I stopped because it made my hair feel heavy and crunchy.

My diet is pretty good and consistent for the most part. I drink plenty of water and I always add some kind of fruit and vegetable to my meals.

I’m starting to think this is due to stress? Is that possible? My hair isn’t falling out, or anything like that. It just doesn’t keep moisture anymore. I’ve spent sooooo much money on products I’m just lost now.

Shea moisture used to make my hair feel amazing, but ever since they changed their formula, it made my hair feel TERRIBLE. Rhyme & Reason didn’t do much for me, Aussie was okay, but not the best either, Mielle was too heavy for my hair type, and Aunt Jackie’s didn’t do much for my hair either.

Thank you for any help it’s really appreciated!