r/nosurf • u/MoanaArielle • 8d ago
Quitting smartphones/apps - tips for social folks?
I started parting ways with Facebook/instagram on and off since Spring. The trouble is, I really miss the social aspect. I’m very social, and normally would talk to lots of friends and share memes/videos during the day. Without it, I felt like I barely heard from anyone. I don’t fault them because it’s a pattern of how we usually communicate and relate to each other. This lead me to go back to both. I also enjoy seeing friends/family updates from other parts of the world. But, I also don’t want my kids to just remember their mom always being on her phone. It’s really important to me to break this addiction. I’m looking into a light phone/dumb phone. How did you deal with the loss of social relationships, and how did you fill the space it left? Thanks!
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u/Jojomomo123iscool 8d ago
I don’t think getting rid of your phone or deleting all social media apps is the right thing to do for everyone.
Have you tried screen blocker apps? I personally use Moshen because I can earn screen time by walking but there are a lot of other good ones out there too depending on what works for you
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u/SpoopyGrab 8d ago
Instead of cutting myself off completely, I find that using the phone’s in-built screen time function or a screen-blocking app like ScreenZen helps with finding moderation; cuz personally cutting myself off completely has never worked, but allowing leeways of even 5-10 mins lets me maintain control whilst still being able to engage in some social aspects
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u/Jurekkie 8d ago
Stepping away feels empty at first. Try replacing scrolling with short calls or a group chat for funny stuff. You keep the social without the trap. Kids notice your presence way more than screens.
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u/PlatypusBackground53 8d ago
I think the cut off from being ‘social’ is a sacrifice you need to make when getting off social media. Kind of the definition I guess? I have been off all year now (insta/facebook) and have really see how dependent people are on it. Even me. Occasionally I’ve thought ‘I’ll just log in to check what’s going’… but then I may as well just stay logged on. So I haven’t been back on at all and I feel better for it… I check Reddit and YouTube a lot now but it’s different. It’s not really ME showing the world me and I’m not up to date with friends but I don’t want to be either. It’s not natural and it gives us something to talk about when we do meet. You also realise no one cares if you deactivate or delete your social media. Maybe 2 or 3 people I don’t have regular contact with have asked me. It’s a fake world, a literal Matrix that we are all plugged in to. If it comes up in conversation, I encourage everyone to just get rid of it. Don’t make an announcement, it’s so cringy. Just DO IT. No one cares and they never will. But endless scrolling through slop and rage bait will take its toll on you without realising. I’m still getting over it.
I read the other day; One day off social media feels like you missed everything. One week off it feels like you missed nothing!
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u/Apprehensive_Pay6141 8d ago
You could try setting small check-ins with friends outside apps. A quick text or call can replace the scroll and still keep the connection. Sometimes people just need a little nudge to switch too.
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u/over60HRT 8d ago
Folks with whom I trade memes but no phone calls or in person are rarely actual friends. If we don’t show up for each other when the shit hits the fan, we are not friends. We are acquaintances.
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u/Fli_fo 6d ago
You could get a extra cheap used smartphone on which you install all those apps.
Then find another place that is not home where you will keep that phone. Maybe your parents, a friend etc.
Then you can still regularly get read up on their posts but it will not interfere with your life at home anymore.
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u/Mackwiss 8d ago
If you are on insta or facebook or any social media app you're not social. You're anti-social in the sense you're against socializing with people but you and everyone else don't even realize this.
Social media are not vessels for social interaction. They're entertainment media... vessels to entertain you and nothing else...