r/nosurf • u/TheStar1359 • 4d ago
Every 4 minutes. That’s how often I grabbed my phone yesterday. Wtf is wrong with me?
I thought my phone use was normal. Scroll a bit before bed. Check stuff in the day. Maybe a few videos. Nothing crazy.
Then I looked at the stats. Over 300 pickups in one day. That’s like once every 4 minutes I was awake.
What got me wasn’t just the number. It was how I didn’t even remember half of it. Unlock scroll close unlock again. Pure autopilot.
And honestly I couldn’t even tell you what I got out of it. No good convos. No new info. Just loops that left me drained.
Seeing that number made me feel gross. Like my brain’s been hijacked. I don’t want to keep living like this but breaking the reflex feels almost impossible.
Anyone here actually manage to retrain themselves? What worked for you?
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u/Garlickzinger911 4d ago
Blackberry hardware is basically obsolete and support for WhatsApp has ended on most models. So even if you pick one up you are likely going to run into compatibility issues. The cleanest option is to keep your main phone but control which apps run and when. A strict block system gives you a lighter version of a detox without losing essential communication. Roots is an app that provides this kind of structured blocking and scheduling and is worth trying before you commit to extra hardware.
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u/WesternZucchini8098 3d ago
You have been physically conditioned by corporations that seek to keep you enthralled by a product that is intentionally made to be that way.
Start going places without the phone. Dont bring it to the grocery store. Dont bring it to the bath room. Start by physically conditioning yourself.
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u/Express_Item_554 4d ago
Dude that autopilot feeling is so real. I was literally doing the same thing, opening apps just to close them and reopen them like some kind of digital zombie.
Here's what actually worked for me
Start asking yourself "Why am I opening this?" every single time before you unlock your phone. This question is based on CBT techniques that Stanford and Harvard research shows are crazy effective for breaking automatic behaviors. It's like installing a speed bump in your brain.
Clear your home screen completely and turn off all notifications except calls/texts. Make your phone boring and harder to use mindlessly.
Create actual physical barriers - charge it in another room, get a real alarm clock, keep your hands busy with something else when you feel the urge.
Use something that forces that pause moment before opening distracting apps. I started using Naze which stops me and makes me set a purpose and time limit. That interruption broke the automatic pattern for me and cut my mindless usage by like 95%.
The addiction feeling is real btw, your brain literally gets dopamine hits from those notifications. But once you break the cycle it gets so much easier.
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u/tardigradesRverycool 4d ago
I cannot overemphasize how important it is to charge it in another room!!! This helped me break the habit of scrolling in bed first thing in the morning.
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u/MacViller 3d ago
Delete the exciting apps. You will keep reflexively reaching for your phone for a while but once you realise there's no dopamine kick to be had there you'll stop.
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u/smallapps 3d ago
I've tried willpowering changes. — I'd delete social media apps, last two days, then reinstall them. I'd put my phone in another room, then find reasons to go get it. I'd try app timers, screen time limits, grayscale mode — everything felt like fighting against myself.
The breakthrough came when I stopped trying to eliminate my phone and started changing what my phone could do. Focus modes became my secret weapon. Not to block everything, but to curate what's available when. Different tools for different contexts. Work phone vs. evening phone vs. weekend phone.
Instead of having willpower battles with Instagram, I just made Instagram unavailable during work hours. Instead of fighting the urge to check Reddit, I made Reddit require three deliberate steps to access.
What seems to be working for me: having changed the phone environment after my intended expectations for what I want it be. It sounds obvious saying it now. Constraint is what created freedom for me. When the decision is already made, the mind is free to focus on other stuff. The result: my phone became the tool I actually wanted it to be.
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u/Fragrant-Departure 3d ago
For when I need my phone but can’t be distracted: Brick app and device. Sometimes I even put the device in a container with a timed lock, so I can’t un-brick my phone. When I don’t need my phone, I just put the whole thing in the locked container.
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u/Sanch0Supreme 3d ago
There's nothing "wrong" with you. Quite the opposite. These devices were set up by some of the smartest people on the planet to be as addictive as possible. Your behavior is normal and you're ahead of many people in the sense that you know you have a problem. Now, it's time to fight back. Get an app that makes you pause before you open any apps you have trouble with. I use screen zen. You can also try other apps that turn your phone black and white to make the screen less appealing. Delete the most troubling apps or at the very least turn off notifications from them. If you can access the app through a web browser try that instead.
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u/PeanutButAJellyThyme 3d ago
Breaking patterns/habits for a week or two, through willpower if necessary, but do it. See how you feel differently. At least it gives you some perspective. A week or two isn't much but it really is doable, the first 2-3 days breaking any habit are probably the worst. Go very low-internet (essential coms/work/study/bookings/weather whatever, you get the point.) and even for a week. It's not a big ask. See how it makes you look at stuff differently.
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u/superchick3177 3d ago
Congratulations! You have a normal human brain.
- You're not broken, lazy or weak.
Your normal human brain is being hijacked (as you mentioned) by tech companies.
They suck you in, keep you scrolling and make your brain dependent on the hit.
This is called dopamine dependence.
Over time, our brains can become less efficient at releasing our own dopamine, and we feel even more hooked into our screens.
Recognize the limits of willpower.
Willpower alone is never a viable solution to any kind of addiction.
You have to learn how to outsmart your brain and hack your habits with automations to limit screen time.Address the root cause
Look at WHY you scroll:
Loneliness?
Boredom?
Lack of Direction / Purpose?
Typically, I find it's an avoidance of feeling discomfort of ANY of these 'Big Emotion' that can get us started with screen time.
Learning holistic coping skills is really helpful to address the root cause.
--
Those are some initial thoughts to get you started. There's a lot of support to be found on this sub. If you're looking for a more concise and digestible format, I have a free masterclass to stop scrolling coming up in September. The link is in my profile.
Best of luck!
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u/anson_2004 2d ago
What helped me was simple: remove and replace. I deleted the apps, cut off porn, gaming, and doom scrolling. I also kept Chrome not easily accessible and used focus mode to add resistance. Then I replaced those habits with better ones like fitness and projects. Removing alone didn’t work, replacing made it stick.
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u/Shot-Practice-5906 119 days 4d ago
dude that stat is wild. honestly the biggest thing is just making the phone harder to grab. put it in another room or turn off all the little buzzes. the less frictionless it is the less you autopilot into it.
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u/Negative-Ad-3673 4d ago
Understand that digital addiction is a behavioural/habit issue. To change habits, you need time and patience. The goal of de-addiction should not be to quit using certain platforms, then you always find a substitute or get overwhelmed and relapse to old habits, but your goal should be to find a healthy balance between beneficial and harmful use
EXAMPLE
The size of the habit doesn’t matter at first, as long as it feels easy for you to maintain.
The key is to maintain this habit consistently and just focus on this habit. If you miss a few days or even weeks, don’t go on a guilt trip; simply accept it and start again the next day. What truly matters is that you keep returning to your routine. Essentially, you keep building gradually on these small, manageable steps to create lasting change. Few tips