r/politics Dec 19 '17

Democrat wins Va. House seat in recount by single vote; creating 50-50 tie in legislature

https://www.washingtonpost.com/local/virginia-politics/democrat-wins-va-house-seat-in-recount-by-single-vote-creating-50-50-tie-in-legislature/2017/12/19/3ff227ae-e43e-11e7-ab50-621fe0588340_story.html?utm_term=.82f2b85b50fa
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u/throwaway_ghast California Dec 19 '17

My anus has puckered into singularity.

730

u/Spaceman2901 Texas Dec 19 '17

Truly the blackest of holes.

298

u/InFearn0 California Dec 19 '17

Truly the brownest of holes.

84

u/[deleted] Dec 19 '17

Truly the brownest of eyes.

19

u/super_aardvark Dec 19 '17

♪ Hey where did we go ♪

4

u/_vrmln_ California Dec 19 '17

♪ The days when the rain came♪

5

u/AdamInChainz Dec 20 '17

The misty hollow is also a euphemism!

2

u/_vrmln_ California Dec 20 '17

For a 🅱ajyna?

8

u/kaptainkeel America Dec 19 '17

What if black holes are the eyes of some gigantic creature?

2

u/UncleDadd Canada Dec 20 '17

Black eye-holes? Get up on outta here with my eye-holes!

1

u/Ayn-Randy_Savage Dec 20 '17

They are, and the creature is called Entropy, and it will kill even the stars as time winds down...

3

u/timidforrestcreature Dec 19 '17

when you stare into the abyss... the abyss stares back into you....

1

u/InFearn0 California Dec 20 '17

when you stare into the abyss... the abyss poops on you....

3

u/poiuytrewq23e Maryland Dec 19 '17

My special eyes...

3

u/MisterHatred Dec 19 '17

Behind brown eyes.

2

u/selophane43 Dec 20 '17

Balloooon knot. Oh myyyy.

1

u/CobaltRose800 New Hampshire Dec 20 '17

I thought that was EnergyFirst Stadium in Cleveland though.

5

u/[deleted] Dec 19 '17

May I recommend /r/Bleached_Assholes?

5

u/The_Dog_Of_Wisdom Maryland Dec 19 '17

It sucks in any poor penis that gets near!!!

2

u/MchugN Minnesota Dec 19 '17

Makes it truly hard to resist.

1

u/capron Dec 19 '17

The darkest of seamlines.

1

u/Adamskinater Dec 19 '17

Tight buttblackhole

1

u/[deleted] Dec 20 '17

Nearly puckered as McCain's brow is furled the past year

0

u/maux_zaikq Dec 19 '17

Lmfao. 😂

0

u/[deleted] Dec 19 '17

Every hole counts!! GANGBANG!

2

u/closer_to_the_flame South Carolina Dec 19 '17

How many anuses did you have before?

3

u/sagan_drinks_cosmos Dec 19 '17

Or rather, what was the Schwarzchild radius of the anus in question?

4

u/closer_to_the_flame South Carolina Dec 19 '17

Are you asking me about the size of child anuses? I guess it depends - was Roy Moore around?

2

u/throwaway_ghast California Dec 19 '17

12.

1

u/JohnGillnitz Dec 19 '17

If it puckers, lube it.

1

u/MrRipShitUp Dec 19 '17

Sugar-free gummy bears will help fix that

1

u/[deleted] Dec 19 '17

this needs to be a Cards Against Humanity white card "my anus puckering into a singularity"

1

u/atmosphere325 Dec 19 '17

singularity

I demand a recount.

1

u/askmatt Dec 19 '17

That’s how brown holes are made

1

u/maux_zaikq Dec 19 '17

I laughed out loud at this in a restaurant.

1

u/[deleted] Dec 20 '17

Well that sounds interesting. Lube up and bite yer lip, I’m going in!

1

u/The-Orig3n Dec 20 '17

Intersmeller

  • Christopher Colon

1

u/[deleted] Dec 20 '17

Can I see it?