Black sheep at the dinner table

[u/FancyLadyLite]

I just need to vent about something that hit me hard after another dinner with extended family. I’ve always felt like the black sheep in my family, not because of who I am, but because of what I value. I started working for a medical school 3 years ago and I teach family centered care, health policy, how to advocate, and sexuality topics all within in the lens of disability. This drove me to pursue my MPH. I love my work. I love my degree. I just had my first guest lecture at an Ivy League for a workshop I’m developing all before I even graduate with my masters. I have had some of the greatest highs of my career and I can’t even celebrate them because my family can’t look past their discomfort. No one ever asks me about how work is or what I’m learning, or what’s going on in my life outside my relationship or how I look. My degree is “controversial” and my work is “political”. Yet still I sit there quietly, waiting for my turn, waiting for someone to show curiosity about me… but it never comes. As the youngest, I’ve spent years thinking eventually they’d see me, that my moment would come. But I’m realizing maybe it never will. We live in a different world now. I don’t want applause or praise. I just want to be considered, to be asked, to feel like I belong in my own family. And it stings to realize that in their eyes, my existence feels less comfortable to engage with than others’ all because after covid I chose to run towards the chaos not from it…

[u/deadbeatsummers]

Oh dear. I wish I could give you a hug. Your work is important and I’m sure they’re proud of your accomplishments but can’t relate to an extent. This is a great sub full of public health workers who share your enthusiasm and passion. We’re all in this together. I know you are needing that validation from family (we all do!). I feel like a black sheep sometimes too for similar reasons. Just remember you’ve got a great community here. Also, congratulations on the guest lecture, that’s amazing! 🤍