r/whowouldwin • u/LetterSequence • Aug 18 '16
Character Scramble VI Winner's Semifinals: The Royal Scramble
The Character Scramble is a bloodmatch tournament where people compete to write the best story they can. At the beginning, everyone submits characters that meet the guidelines, then those characters are randomized and distributed evenly. From then on, each week there's a new writing prompt for everyone to follow. At the end of the week, everyone votes for who they think should advance, until we have our winner at the end. The winner at the end of the tournament gets to choose the theme, tier, and rules of the next scramble, along with a nice custom flair as their reward. The current theme is Wrestling, and the current tier is 3/10 Venom to 7/10 Carnage. There are currently only two more weeks until the finale, so stay tuned!
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This match is between /u/Cleverly_Clearly and /u/Sanitymeter. This fight will decide who makes it to the grand finale, and who has to participate in the loser's finals. These two spent a whole three weeks on this prompt, so be sure to treat the stories with great respect, as it took a long time for everything to come together.
After delivering the orb to Phane, it seems like they really did manage to solve everything. Maybe a little too well, though. Your team has been left alone for a whole week. No matches, no threats from the Scramble Gods, no prompts, simply nothing. They’ve been enjoying this rest time (or hating it, I dunno I’m not your mom), but the back of their mind has always been wondering, what was up with everything? Is that really it? Is everything really fixed? But most importantly, who was trying to sabotage the scramble?
It seems that all of their questions will be answered tonight, because a mysterious note was left in their locker room. “Come to the ring in 10 minutes.” Seeing little else to do, they head there and see two things. The first is another wrestling team, which after a quick conversation realizes they got the same note as you. The second is a mysterious hooded figure in the middle of the ring, with a microphone in one hand, and the orb you retrieved earlier in the other!
“How do you have that?” one of the eight wrestlers asks. The hooded figure simply laughs. “I have it because I’m the one who’s been messing with the scramble. Pulling timelines left and right. When you have infinite power and you get bored. And when you get bored, well, lots of things seem fun. Even at the cost of some innocent scrambler’s lives.” The wrestlers get angry, when one of them shouts at the figure, “Who are you? Show yourself!” After a laugh, they get a simple response. “Unmask me yourself.”
The air is stiff, the crowd is silent in anticipation, and the scramblers don’t know what to do. They discuss it with each other, before one of them decides to jump in the ring. They hesitantly reach their hand out, and remove the hood in one fell swoop. “Y-you!? It was you!?” A menacing laugh is heard before he screams into the microphone in his hands. “It was me, Phane! It was me all along, Phane! You all bought it!” The mysterious figure, the one destroying timelines, bringing universes together, and tearing apart the very core of the scramble… was none other than Letter!
“I’ve also got a nice little surprise for you two teams. Using the power of Missingno inside this ball, I can rival even Phane. So, tonight, one of you will make it to the finals, ready for your championship match. The other… is going home tonight as a loser! Now, I just have one question for you guys…” He holds the ball high in the sky, releasing its dark energy into the air. “Are you all ready to rumble?” The energy surrounds the teams, before they all get sent teleported to different locations.
The scramblers are all sent backstage in their respective locker rooms. All they have on them is a number, and a rule sheet explaining what type of match this is. A royal rumble. Once their number is called, they’ll be teleported to the arena at the top of the ramp, with no way to escape unless they win or lose. They’ll simply have to fight. While they’re getting ready to fight, they notice someone very important is missing. Where’s their manager?
Well, it seems that Letter gets to make some new friends. Two, in fact. Phane’s office seems to be completely empty for some reason, and Letter has dragged both of them into the office with no way to leave. Mostly because he locked the door and hid the key somewhere real good. “Don’t worry guys. I’ve given you headsets to keep in touch with your team while they’re out there. But this way I can ensure there’s no last minute “enhancements” or “commands” given to anyone using your special powers. For now, sit back, relax…” Letter turns on a television, showing the wrestling arena as the first person enters the ring. “...and enjoy the show.”
Normal Rules
Team Preview: Look at all these obscure characters in the scramble! Give a brief summary of your characters in your post. Be sure to mention things like powers, personality, weaknesses, just stuff that the average reader should know before reading.
You Always Go Over: Wrestling is totally real and the fights are legit, never staged at all, promise. In your write up, your team needs to win. Even if you think your team would lose 9/10 times, mention that in your post, then say how your team wins 1/10 times.
Well, It’s the Big Show: The arena will always be able to hold all the wrestlers inside. No matter if you’re a giant robot, monster, or alien thing, you’ll always find a way to fit inside the ring. The ring is also indestructible, and won’t be destroyed because someone super strong jumped on it or anything like that.
Not Your Gimmick: Characters are assumed to be at the same power level they started the tournament at at all times. To clarify, this means you would not be able to loot Triple H of his Sledgehammer if you beat him in a previous round, or otherwise gain a competitive advantage based on anything that happened in a previous round. This is to aid your opponent in research of your character.
I Guess Every Superhero Needs His Theme Music: You can’t be a wrestling team without an entrance! Give your team a song that fits them. Doesn’t matter what type of song it is, as long as they have some sort of entrance music. It is common for there to be theme music for both each wrestler individually and one for the team, depending on who they are representing when they make their entrance.
Due Date: Whenever you finish tbh, you have three loser’s matches to go through.
Please Vote: If you don’t vote, then you don’t win. It’s that simple. Not voting means you get kicked out of the tournament, so you should probably do that shit ASAP rocky.
Round Specific Rules
Match Type: Royal Rumble. Let me give you a quick rundown of what a Royal Rumble is. A Royal Rumble is a simple match. Every 60 seconds, a new wrestler enters the ring, with a total of 30 wrestlers the whole match. If both of the wrestler’s feet touch the outside of the ring after being thrown over the top rope, they’re considered out. The objective is to throw as many people out of the ring as you can, while staying in the ring as long as you can. To count this as a win, at least one member of your team needs to be the last member remaining in the ring.
Manager Involvement: Becoming BFF’s with Letter. Both managers are side by side in a room with Letter, with headsets on to communicate to their team and real time footage of the fight. So naturally, issuing orders should be easy. However, with the other manager next to you, counter orders will also be easy. As will counter counter orders. As will… you get the idea.
You’re on First!: One of the members of your team was unlucky enough to draw the #1 slot. That means they’ll have to be in the ring from the beginning and last as long as they can against everyone else.
2-30: It’s your job to determine who got numbers 2-30. Now you may be wondering “But there’s only 6 people in this round, how am I supposed to get 24 more?” Well, it’s simple. Get creative. I’ll allow you to choose whoever you want to occupy the other slots, with the only restriction being that they need to be people who have been submitted to a scramble before.
Grounded: “Oh, I’ll just fly around the arena and won’t have to worry about a thing!” Nice try. If you spend more than 15 seconds flying or floating in the air, then gravity will begin to increase around you. It’ll be slow, but if you stay too long in the air, you’ll eventually sink like a stone into the ground. Wouldn’t want to drop like a rock outside the ring, would you?
Stupid Animals…: Making this so complicated. Alright, normally humans just need to touch the ground with their TWO feet to be eliminated. So, for Rainbow Dash, if two of her legs touch outside the arena, she’s out. If four of Kumonga’s legs touch the ground, he’s out. Lastly, considering the T-1000 is a pile of goop, if he gets thrown out the ring at all, he’s out.
Flavor Rules
By God, He’s Broken in Half!: Sometimes, there’s announcers during matches, and announcers usually say some crazy shit. If you so wish, you can write these announcers providing commentary over the match. Your announcers today are… whoever you want them to be.
I can’t believe you’ve done this.: Letter seems like a pretty crazy (and sexy) guy, but every villain must have a reason for doing what they’ve done. So, why is Letter trying to sabotage the scramble?
You can vote on the stories in this voting form. Voting will end on Sunday morning. Get ready to choose your potential future champion!
4
u/Cleverly_Clearly Aug 18 '16
Turn 51: Killswitch
Slice, slice, duck, turn, parry, dodge, spin!
Polnareff was battling at speeds so intense, Lelouch couldn’t even give him advice in time. He couldn’t remove his armor, he needed the extra protection, but Nanami might have been too fast for even him to handle. Even worse, she remained nonchalant the entire time. Any hit he made was negligible, every hit she made exacerbated his injuries. He was already having a hard time breathing. Polnareff had never had a broken rib press up against his lungs, but he was starting to think that that was what was happening. He coughed, giving Nanami an opening to cut into his shoulder with a mixed-combination strike. Things were going bad.
There had to be a trick, right? In all of his fights, there was some way to win. He’d brought Vanilla Ice into the sunlight. He’d fooled Alessi with the mirror. He needed to find that trick. He just needed to find that weak point! Well, the voice in his head wasn’t giving him any ideas, so he had to think it up himself. He would have one shot at this.
Silver Chariot lunged at her eyes. She caught the rapier in her teeth, but missed the other hand, which came up from underneath and jabbed two fingers in. She was only temporarily blinded, but that was all the time Polnareff needed. A diagonal slash across her chest opened her robe, revealing Akuto Bita. With his own bare hands, he reached in and pulled the sword out. With a great heave, he threw the sword far across the stomach, into a pool of viscous stomach acid.
Nanami wasn’t impressed. “You could have used that sword to heal yourself.”
What? Oh shit!
“I don’t need dishonorable tricks to win!”, he cried out. Silver Chariot began to tear Nanami apart with a vicious volley of passionate swordsmanship.
“Horahorahorahorahorahorahorahorahorahorahorahorahorahorahorahorahorahorahorahorahora!”
Nanami seemed suspended in air for a brief instant, as if pulled up by an invisible string, before smiling at the last moment.
“What a beautiful sword.”
She collapsed. Whether she was alive or dead, Polnareff couldn’t tell.
“Now, first thing’s first,” he said, looking around in the dank depths, “I’ve got to get out of this horrible place.”
Zipper Man
BRUNO BUCCELLATI
Awesome!
Are you ready to see the best character in Part V?
Besides Mista.
Oh, that’s not a fair comparison.
Let’s say they’re tied.
Another Jojo character, that’s all that matters.
If Kumonga fucking eats him, I swear…
Kumonga staggered again. His small arachnid brain was working overtime to figure out the problem. He felt like he was going to be sick. The little humans (human and cat, at least) nipping at his legs weren’t helping.
So, where is he?
Sshhh!
From out of the ether, a golden zipper appeared across the diagonal length of the arena. Corvo and Garfield leaped out of the way as the ring opened up to reveal Bruno Buccellati and his Stand, Sticky Fingers.
STICKY FINGERS!
Don’t say that, it’s copyrighted!
Oh shit! We’re getting thrown in jail!
We’re all going down to Green Dolphin Street.
Kumonga coughed, or hacked up, or something. He wasn’t sure what had happened to him, but he had involuntarily spat out a long rope of something sticky and blue. He didn’t recognize it at the time, but it was his blood.
Garfield moved forward with lightning speed to attack Bruno. Bruno leaned back into the ropes, rushed forward, and short-clotheslined him, knocking the tabby cat flat on his ass. Corvo fired a bolt at him, but Sticky Fingers caught it in three fingers and sent it back. Garfield retailated from the floor with his shotgun leg, but Sticky Fingers deflected the bullets with his incredible speed.
Kumonga was starting to shake. He couldn’t even comprehend what was happening to him. A spider has no grasp of its own mortality. It didn’t understand what was happening to it. It didn’t understand that it was about to die.
He reared back on his four back legs. The remaining combatants watched in horror as Kumonga prepared to stomp down on them with his powerful legs. At the last moment, something stopped him. He couldn’t find a way forward. His pseudo-muscles refused to work.
He cried out, and toppled backwards. The audience screamed as Kumonga crashed down backwards on top of them. Its legs twitched wildly for half a minute, then suddenly stopped. Kumonga was finished.
What the hell was that all about?
That’s it? He just died?
Well I’d imagine that radioactive spiders don’t have a long lifespan.
Wait a minute, what’s that? Look at like his web-shooters! Look at his ass!
Is that what I think it is?
Something was beginning to emerge from Kumonga’s rear end. Like the miracle of childbirth, smeared in mysterious bodily fluids, bloody and bruised, Polnareff emerged from the corpse of the giant spider, to raucous cheers (from the audience that hadn’t already died).
OH MY GOD!
IT’S POLNAREFF!
HE DID IT! HE DID THE IMPOSSIBLE!
HAVE MY CHILDREN, POLNAREFF!
Polnareff struck another incredible pose. “My Stand is Silver Chariot! It symbolizes invasion and victory! And with both of those things, I have triumphed!”
“How?”
Lelouch put his fists up in the air. “Checkmate!”
“No, no. I could understand cutting up Kumonga from the inside,” Bonesaw said, “but his body has been loaded down with diseases and rot. Polnareff should be a festering corpse by now.”
The cameras zoomed in on Polnareff. Bonesaw’s eyes focused in on his chest, and the subtle lump in between the pecs.
“Is that a joke?”
Lelouch smiled. “I had him fish Akuto Bita out of there. It melted his hand away, but the sword’s power licked his wounds and made it better.”
Letter cracked open another RC Cola. “*Probably should have done something about that,” he grumbled. “Ah, hell, that was the tribunal’s fault, not mine.”
AND WE’VE GOT ANOTHER CHARACTER COMING UP!
How can you distract from this awesome moment, dude? Polnareff just birthed himself from the monster like Ace Ventura!
Don’t bring up Ace Ventura.
No! I’m bringing up Ace Ventura.
You’ll like this one, it’s the incredible RAINBOW DASH!
Beloved Tomboyish Equine
RAINBOW DASH
Fuck.