r/whowouldwin • u/Cleverly_Clearly • Jul 08 '17
Special Character Scramble Season VIII Round 2B: Dinner Bell
The Character Scramble is a writing prompt tournament where people compete to write the best story they can. At the beginning, everyone submits characters that meet the guidelines, then those characters are randomized and distributed evenly. From then on, each week there's a new writing prompt for everyone to follow. At the end of the week, everyone votes for who they think should advance, until we have our winner at the end. The winner at the end of the tournament gets to choose the theme, tier, and rules of the next scramble, along with a nice custom flair as their reward. The current theme is based on Part 6 of the Jojo’s Bizarre Adventure manga, and the tier is 2-8/10 against Captain America or Batman.
Without further ado, here we go!
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This round is only Matches 24-30! Check the pairings to see who you’re fighting!
(♫)
It’s dinner time in the prison schedule. The many inmates of Green Dolphin Street shuffle towards the canteen to fill their stomachs. But they’re in for a surprise. Your team needs to build up their rep among the other prisoners if they’re going to stand a chance in this prison, and an easy way to do that would be cooking up something tasty for them. So your team signs up for the kitchen’s prison labor program and heads down to the kitchen thirty minutes before dinner to fix up some grub for the inmates.
However, you aren’t the only prisoners in the kitchen tonight. Four other convicts are cooking right alongside you. Not working alongside you, no- they’re cooking something entirely separate. And they won’t let you help them or help you with your meals. What do they think this is, a competition or something? Well, it’s not going to help your reputation if these other guys cook something that’s way better than what you cooked, so you have to cook something that can blow their dish out of the water.
Pots are bubbling on the stove, the temperature is rising, and temperatures are flaring! All it’ll take is two hands reaching for the bell peppers at the same time for things to boil over and for this cooking contest to devolve into a full-blown fight. You’d better hurry up, though. Outside in the canteen, the prisoners wait, hungry like the wolf.
Yes, just like the Duran Duran song, “Hungry Like The Wolf”. See, there’s a reason I put that song there.
Normal Rules
People Living In Competition: Look at all these obscure characters in the scramble! Give a brief summary of your characters in your post. Be sure to mention things like powers, personality, weaknesses, just stuff that the average reader should know before reading.
All I Do Is Win: The Scramble is a game, and in the end the player always wins the game. This time the player is you, champ! That means that when your write your story, your team always comes out victorious. Even if the odds of you winning are 1 in 100, explain those odds in the analysis and then show us that 1 miracle run.
Take Your Hand Out Of My Pocket: Characters are assumed to be at the same power level they started the tournament at at all times. To clarify, this means you would not be able to loot Captain America of his shield if you beat him in a previous round, or otherwise gain a competitive advantage based on anything that happened in a previous round. This is to aid your opponent in research of your character.
Ballots Not Bullets: If you don’t vote, you don’t win. Simple. Voting qualifies you for each round, which means forgetting to vote gets you kicked out, regardless of whether or not you would have won. That means that when the voting goes up (after the due date), you should probably take care of it pronto-like.
Due Date: The night of Saturday, the 15th
Round-Specific Rules
Round Goal: Cooking By The Book! You’ve got to whip up a totally kickass meal for the other prisoners, or at least one that’s better than what the other team can make. Whether this involves pure culinary skill, sabotaging the enemy team, straight up pummeling the other team so that they can’t cook at all, or some other method, what you’re cooking has got to be better than what they cook.
Whatever You Like: This is a totally professional kitchen with access to a wide variety of fresh ingredients, allowing you to cook pretty much whatever you want. It’s like something out of a cooking show. Why do the cooks feed all of you slop instead of using the ingredients to make real food? That mystery may never be answered.
Let Them Eat War: There’s a lot of hungry prisoners out there! You might not be able to cook enough food to feed them all, but you should try to feed as many of them as possible. You don’t want the ones who go hungry to gang up on you and shiv you in the showers, do you?
4
u/LetterSequence Jul 16 '17
“Guys… shouldn’t we stop him?” Johnny realized how drastic this situation was, but the other two members of his team didn’t really seem to care.
“He’s fighting so that we can cook.” Anna had just finished searing both sides of the beef, and was beginning to set up the foil to wrap it in, a huge grin on her face the whole time. “Let him defend our honor and show off his strength.”
“Let the kid get his ass kicked. He deserves it.”
Johnny knew that if he was gonna get him to stop, he’d need to do something himself. Mustering all of his strength, he leapt out of his wheelchair, flying through the air over the crying limp body of Dragonfly until he landed right on Gangryong’s back.
“Get the fuck outta my way you damn cripple!” With a quick Judo throw, Gangryong threw Johnny over his shoulders and onto the cold hard ground underneath him. The impact reverberated throughout his body before being cut short below his waist, but he could still feel the pain and the message he was trying to send. ‘Don’t get in my way, or else.’
Leaping into the air, Gangryong went for a leaping superman punch on the largest man in the room, Neptuneman. “You’re first, you big fucker!” Putting all of his force behind the hit, he knew that he would need to supercharge the punch for it to affect someone of that size. With more lightning than he would normally use, the punch connected right with the giant hulk’s chin, but it did little more than cause him to stagger a mere step backwards.
“I must admit, that had some good force behind it. But a user of electricity will never be able to lay a scratch on me.” He cracked his knuckles, looking at the small teenager below him. “Still, you have potential. I shall test if you truly are worthy of facing someone as strong as me.”
“What the-” Without warning, Neptuneman grabbed both of his arms and put Gangryong in a shoulder lock that he couldn’t escape, no matter how much force he used or how much electricity he output. A few quaint moments later, Neptuneman released the lock with a look of disappointment.
“You are but a cruiserweight choujin, incapable of fighting a heavyweight. Good, but not good enough. Go train in the mountains and die. Perhaps if you beg God enough in the afterlife, you’ll be reborn as someone strong enough to be worthy of my time.” With this, he turned his back on the korean martial artist, refusing to fight him.
“What kind of pussy excuse is that?” Fueled by anger, Gangryong threw another electricity filled punch at Neptuneman’s back, which still didn’t do much to hurt him. To his surprise however, Gangryong couldn’t manage to remove his arm. It was completely stuck to the muscle bound wrestler’s backside.
“Ah yes, I forgot to mention. My body is essentially a magnetic field. Your puny electricity must be forcing you to be stuck to me. An embarrassing way to die, to be sure, but a fitting one. Your foolish recklessness will be your downfall.”
As he exerted more force to pull his arm away, he saw out of the corner of his eye the android woman rushing toward him with her sword out. At the rate she was moving, she’d be on him in the next three seconds. He needed to think fast, or else he’d become chopped liver. Magnets attract opposite polarities, right? That means that whatever shit this magnet was on, it was the opposite of his lightning fist. Which would mean he just needed to fill his ki with the same charge of the magnet to dissipate the effect.
“Thunder Break!” Using his free hand, he punched Neptuneman one last time, filling his fist with negative ki to negate the positive ki from his earlier electricity. This had the intended effect, and freed him from his capture. Quickly turning around, he faced 2B head on, ready for the sword to come crashing down into him. When she was only a few inches away, he activated his secret plan.
“Half step!” With minimal movement, Gangryong shifted his body to the side completely dodging the attack. By 2B’s calculations, it would have been impossible for him to dodge given the timing and positioning, so she wasn’t able to stop her movement in time. The sword continued on its movement path and stabbed Neptuneman with full force. He let out a scream of pain from the shock, causing 2B to reel backwards from regret. The perfect opportunity to strike.
Dashing forward, Gangryong wrapped his whole palm around 2B’s face. “Get overclocked, you bombacious bucket of bolts!” Using his other hand, he grabbed the back of her head, not being gentle with her hair whatsoever. “Electric Yo-Yo!” By flowing a steady stream of electricity between his hands, 2B became a battery of sorts, absorbing all the electricity he had within him. Of course, every battery reaches its capacity at some point, and the same was true of 2B. Eventually, she reached a point where her body wouldn’t handle any more power, and her systems began to short circuit until eventually her body shut down. When he felt the machine go limp in his hands, he threw her to the side and looked back at Neptuneman.
“One left.” He gripped the sword still stuck in his back and jammed it in further, relishing in the wrestler’s screams before finally pulling it out and throwing it to the side. “Nah, if I’m gonna beat you, it’s gonna be with my own strength.” Sending a negative ki charge throughout his whole body, he gripped onto the weakened wrestler as best he could. “Let’s see how you handle one of your own moves.” With his arms wrapped firmly around his abdomen, Gangryong used all the strength he could muster and fell backwards, lifting the wrestler above him the whole while. At the last minute, he let go, throwing the oversized man into a table with the perfect form of a german suplex. It was clear that the wrestler was out for the count.
“Fucker’s gotta be broken in half after that one. I don’t care who you are, going through a table is enough to end a match.” Tired and out of breath, Gangryong looked around to admire his handiwork. Four prisoners, each with strength comparable to his own, beaten in one foul swoop. Shit, five prisoners if you count Johnny, but he couldn’t put up much of a fight.
“Shit, is that all? I was expecting a challenge! I guess no one here can defeat the legend known as Gangryong Ma!” The thrill of battle got to his head once more, and he triumphantly lifted his hand in the air. Chuck didn’t seem to give a shit, Johnny looked on in horror, and Anna seemed to actually stop cooking for a moment to give him a short round of applause.
Sadly, it seemed that his fighting wasn’t over yet. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw a certain green costumed dumbass begin to move. To be fair, all he did was throw an onion at his face, so he didn’t get a proper beatdown. Gangryong caught his breath and walked over to Dragonfly, who had managed to muster enough strength to lift himself off the ground and look up at Gangryong.
“Yo, you ready to get your ass kicked?”
“Can I get a raincheck on that? I kinda have a thing later.”
“Not a chance.” Gangryong stretched his hand out to Dragonfly, who looked at him in confusion. “I don’t like to fight an opponent who’s down. Get up so we can fight like men.” Dragonfly nodded and took his hand, only to be met with a constant stream of electricity. The pain was too much for him to handle, and he let go of the hand while flopping back onto the ground with a gentle thud. “Hah, did you really think I’m gonna show respect to someone like you? Now get back up! I’m not done with you!”
Dragonfly instinctively reached out his hand for Gangryong to pick him up, simply confusing Gangryong before he kicked him while he was stuck on the ground. “I said get up!”
“I don’t even like Disney movies!”
“...What the hell are you talking about?”
As Gangryong’s anger and impatience reached its peak, his blood chilled as he felt a painful sensation in his abdomen. Looking down, he saw a large sword peaking through his body covered in blood. His blood. The sword was swiftly redrawn, and Gangryong used the last of his strength to turn around, only to see the robot woman from earlier, standing tall. She grabbed his head and slammed it to the ground, making a small crater on the floor next to Dragonfly. Satisfied with her work, she turned around and looked to the rest of the kitchen.
“System reboot successful. Various targets remaining in the immediate area.” She wiped the blood off of her sword and looked right at Johnny. “Eliminating hostiles.”